The Secret Base of the Rebel Black Dot Society

2012-02-12T18:11:00.004-05:00

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXII - The bathyscaphe Trieste & Project NEKTON, the conquest of the Challenger Deep.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Hippos, "So Lonely" from Forget the World (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Perhaps my favorite characteristic of third wave ska/ska-punk is the juxtaposition of peppy melodies with sad lyrics, a smile & snarky cynicism barely glossing over a profound, persistent gloom. The masters of this were & are the Reel Big Fish, but in their now-bygone time The Hippos were no slouches, though "So Lonely" is perhaps not the best example of those peppy melodies.

2012-02-11T23:59:00.001-05:00

You're no idea how thrilled I was to be able to shovel snow from the driveway this morning. I say that without the slightest trace of irony. I've missed the winter, "the dark, killing winter," like a drowning man misses dry land. The snow! The ice! The bone-chilling wind that cuts through your parka as if it wasn't even there! I enjoy immensely each of these things & have been by & large denied their splendor all this long, pathetically warm & sunny winter. I know this won't last, that the misaligned jetstream will soon enough return us to the abominable warmth, but for a few days at least my beloved winter is here & I am so very, very happy.

Project GLOWWORM
As much as I love both winter & my whiskers, & as much as I reveled in today's snowy wonderland, icicles in my bear & my moustache are no fun at all. Through two winters, I've not devised a way around the problem. In the same fashion, though I have breakfast cereal more mornings than not, I've not yet devised a method for keeping milk from soaking the lowest-hanging strands of my moustaches's flying handlebars. Small prices to pay for the day-in & day-out pleasure of the whiskers, but prices to pay nonetheless.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The New Main Street Singers, "The Good Book Song" from A Mighty Wind: The Album (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "It's scary, but it's true…"

2012-02-10T20:37:00.003-05:00

The Queue
Some of the short stories in Hauntings were magnificent triumphs, others were spectacular failures & utter wastes of time. I discovered authors whose works I wish to investigate further & authors whom I would not read again for love or money. Overall, I was reminded that I greatly prefer to the novel to the short story, prizing the virtues of the longer form. Still, I declare Hauntings a success as an experiment.

Recently
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Calculus Affair, The Red Sea Sharks, & Tintin in Tibet
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Castafiore Emerald, Flight 714, & Tintin and the Picaros
Henry Mazzeo, editor, & Edward Gorey, illustrator, Hauntings: Tales of the Supernatural

Currently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes

Presently
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Fountains of Wayne, "Valley Winter Song" from Welcome Interstate Managers (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Snow, clouds, ice, at long last.

"What else is new? What can I do,
But sing this valley winter song I wrote for you?"

Donnerstag, 9 Februar
Brian Carpenter's Ghost Train Orchestra, "Ghost Train (Orchestra)" from Hothouse Stomp: The Music of 1920s Chicago and Harlem (T.L.A.M.)

2012-02-08T22:15:00.007-05:00

Happy Birthday!
Warmest wishes for the happiest of birthdays to the most enigmatic of all my kith, The Ace! If ever you hear that I've relocated to Thailand to open a Mexican-style cantina called El Norteamericano, you'll know that The Ace & I are up to no good & looking for trouble. In the meantime, I'm reading his manuscript of the Project TROIKA novel & looking forward to an illustrious career in letters as his collaborator. Incidentally, The Ace is either the smartest or the second-smartest person with whom I've ever been acquainted. Happy birthday, Jon!

Project PANDORA
This afternoon, whilst walking about campus in the—at long last—bone-chilling cold in the company of Ska Army, he told me that he'd taken my advice & asked out April May June, an eager young photojournalist for the campus rag whom I met a few weeks back the last time I saw The Loose Ties at the Soggy Bottom (she was on assignment, taking snapshots of the band). April May June is cute as a button, one of those girls who still looks like she's sixteen well into her twenties, & I well understand Ska Army's interest. He made what I regard as a fairly obvious blunder, not in asking her out but in asking her out for Valentine's Day. Of what would I accuse Ska Army? Overreach, I suppose. Asking a girl to go out with you for the first time on Valentine's Day has to be setting yourself up for failure. (Perhaps I shouldn't judge, as Ska Army has had two comely girlfleshes in the time I've known him, compared to my none, but I will judge, because I remain confident in my reasoning.) I reassured him that he'd made the right move, that it was better to ask a girl out & be rejected than to delay & pine & end up never casting the die. I then jested that with his rejection the field was open for my advances, using a tone & phrasing that set us both about a good laugh.

The question is, Should I make a move on April May June? I think not. We hit it off at the Soggy Bottom & I am attracted to her insofar as she's {a} a girl & {b} a cute girl, but I'm not infatuated with her. My instincts have often lead me astray & perhaps I should ignore them, but I cannot; deaf & blind as they are, they're still the best tools I've got. But if not April May June, whom? Who are my current prospects? It's fair to say that PANDORA is in the doldrums. There's nothing for it but to shake out the rust & shake off the winter's lethargy. If there aren't any intriguing lasses in my everyday orbits, it's time to resume using ye older interwebs to cast a wider net. Plenty o' fish in the sea, as they say. Ahoy, ladies!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Elvis Costello & The Attractions, "Radio, Radio" from This Year's Model (T.L.A.M.)

2012-02-07T22:53:00.002-05:00

Project MERCATOR
In a rare midweek outing, & a reunion with chums of longstanding, I rode down to Great Lakes Crossing with Daddy Dylweed, & we were joined there by the Anonymous Friend for dinner & a motion picture, The Grey. 'Twas delightful seeing them both, though once the film Cowboys & Aliens was mentioned my mind kept casting back to last summer & a date with The Redhead, when I saw the mediocre film at her insistence. The circumstances of today's reunion were less than ideal, but such is life; when given lemons, make lemonade.

Also, this morning I awoke to a report on the radio about the wolf population in Michigan. It seems that most of the wolves are in the vast wilderness of the Upper Peninsula ("the U.P."), but some have made their unholy way down to the Lower Peninsula ("the Mitten"). Yeah, so even in downtown Flint I'm going to be paranoid about wolves for the next few days; not perhaps the most auspicious day on which to have seen The Grey.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Flogging Molly, "Every Dog Has Its Day" from Swagger (T.L.A.M.)

2012-02-06T20:01:00.006-05:00

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXI - The Marianas Trench, including the Challenger Deep, the deepest point on the Earth's surface.

Project MERCATOR
This Super Bowl Sunday (or, as our guest priest pointed out at Mass, the Fifth Sunday of Ordinary Time), I found myself in the horns of a dilemma. I'd received invitations to two discrete Super Bowl parties, but the dilemma was not in deciding which to attend (one was in Grand Blanc & the other in Lapeer, past B.F.E.); rather, not being a fan of the No Fun League, whyever should I want to watch Super Bowl XLVI? (Aside from a fondness for Roman numerals that will surprise no regular reader of "The Explorers' Club," that is.) In the end, in clear violation of Project MERCATOR's strictures, I stayed home. I made good use of my hermitage, though, watching This is Spinal Tap, laughing & laughing & laughing…

Obamboozled
President Obama left United States allies the Czech Republic & the Republic of Poland twisting in the wind over ballistic missile defense in order to foster his prized "reset" of relations with the Russian Federation. Later, in order to curry favor with the People's Republic of China (P.R.C.), Mr. Obama declined to put American defense industry workers back on the job when he refused permission for Taiwan (the Republic of China) to purchase vast quantities of weapons from the U.S. The fruits of the president's suborning of American security & economic interests to generate goodwill with Moscow & Beijing? The Russian Federation & the P.R.C. vetoed an already watered-down United Nations Security Council resolution concerning the ongoing civil strife in the Syrian Arab Republic: veto-link.

Normally, the title of this feature, "Obamboozled," refers to the way in which then-Senator Obama bamboozled so many non-hardcore left-wing voters into supporting his '08 campaign. In this specific instance, though, it perhaps more rightly reflects the way in which the Russians & the Chinese bamboozled President Obama & Mrs. Clinton, his hapless Secretary of State, tricking them into making vital compromises of American interests & American values in exchange for empty promises & all-too-predictable betrayals. He who Obamboozled has himself been Obamboozled. I'd guffaw but for all the innocent Syrian blood shed.

Vote for Kodos
Misfortune befell me today insofar as I found myself engaged in a political discussion with a wretched Libertarian, a supporter of Representative Ron Paul's bid for the Republican presidential nomination. (He was not especially wretched, beyond the de rigueur wretchedness of all that misbegotten ilk.) Our discussion was fairly grounded in reality until he got to the "real reasons" for the Iraq War & the recent Western intervention in the Libyan civil war: in 2003, Saddam Hussein was about to start selling petroleum in euros; in 2011, Muammar Gaddafi was about to begin selling petroleum in a "gold-backed pan-African currency." Wow. A slow, ironic wow. You never have to dig too deeply into the beliefs of a Paul supporter before you find the break from reality. The misfortune ended shortly thereafter when I was able to make a lucky escape.

I strenuously wish those duplicitous Libertarians would go back to their own screwball party & stop pretending to be Republicans. I want my G.O.P. back, you rat finks!

CADMUS
Operation VAUXHALL is back in effect, & so far so good.

The Queue
There is a noticeable decline in the quality of The Adventures of Tintin at the end of the series, specifically in Flight 714 & Tintin and the Picaros. I'm confident that much more goodness awaits in the early & middle adventures, based on the strength of Cigars of the Pharaoh & Tintin in Tibet. For now, back to ghost (short) stories.

Recently
Stephen Weiner, Jason Hall, & Victoria Blake, illustrated by Mike Mignola, et al., Hellboy: The Companion
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Calculus Affair, The Red Sea Sharks, & Tintin in Tibet
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Castafiore Emerald, Flight 714, & Tintin and the Picaros

Currently
Henry Mazzeo, editor, & Edward Gorey, illustrator, Hauntings: Tales of the Supernatural

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Fountains of Wayne, "The Girl I Can't Forget" from Out-of-State Plates, Disc Two (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: One of my very favorite songs. I will need The Last Angry Bride, whether I've met her & just not yet realized who she is or our paths have not yet crossed, to have the sense of fun & generosity of spirit of the titular girl.

Sonntag, 5 Februar
Spinal Tap, "(Tonight I'm Gonna) Rock You Tonight" from This is Spinal Tap (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I am a persnickety chap, insisting on ångström instead of angstrom, for example, but I cannot countenance the "official" spelling of Spinal Tap due both to the ridiculous & ungrammatical umlaut over the "n" & the lack of a dot over the "i". The characters are so outlandishly unreal—which is the point of them, yes, I know—that even when I cut & pasted that spelling of Spinal Tap into this post's H.T.M.L., it would not display properly on the published post. The R.B.D.S.O.T.D. was a toss-up between "(Tonight I'm Gonna) Rock You Tonight" & "Big Bottom," because I do love that bass line.

Samstag, 4 Februar
Flogging Molly, "Devil's Dance Floor" from Swagger (T.L.A.M.)

2012-02-03T16:23:00.004-05:00

My Macintosh is no longer able to connect reliably to the house's wireless internet. My Macintosh's wireless modem, Airport, can occasionally find the house's network, but the network will then immediately disappear from the menu. At other times, Airport is entirely unable to find the network. I do not know if the fault is in the network—which has been glitchy in the past, sometimes failing for days at a time only to be restored to functionality without any intervention—or in Airport itself, which went on the fritz not long before my Macintosh crashed & burned a couple years hence. In either event, I've dug my old cable out of storage & connected my Macintosh to the house's modem physically. Only time will tell if this wireless outage is temporary or permanent.

Project MERCATOR | Project PANDORA
I ran into Jojo on Wednesday & she was looking particularly delectable. A host of good reasons remain why not even to attempt to pursue her romantically, & I abide by my decision to be nothing other than her friend, but not everything I feel for her is strictly… friendly. *insert wolfish grin here*

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Golem, "Citizen Boris" from Citizen Boris (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Boris Hoffman, you are now a citizen of the United States, so help you God."

2012-02-02T16:28:00.001-05:00

Operation AXIOM
Happy Groundhog Day, treasured readers! Punxsutawney Phil prognosticated six more weeks of winter this morn, though the "more" part is risible in the midst of this, the worst winter ever. Temperatures have been in the forties more often than they've been in the twenties, & in the fifties at least twice every fortnight. This winter is a disgrace. Let us hope that the Inner Circle aren't just blow smoke, because these next six weeks are the last chance we have for the ill-fated Winter of 2011-12.

All I ask is everything in its season. I don't ask for cool summers, I ask only that Summer's heat be confined to the period of May through September. I ask not for winter is July, I ask only for winter in its season. Come on, Aeolus, let's not make a liar out of Phil!

Also on the theme of better late than never...

The Victors: 2012 Sugar Bowl Champions
(№ 13) Michigan 23-20 Virginia Tech. (№ 11) (O.T.)
11-2, Big Ten 6-2

My father & I watched the Sugar Bowl at a family friend's house, because that evening(3 January 2012) my mother was hosting her monthly bunco game at our home. Our host, Bob, a casual football fan, was unfamiliar with the, shall we say, unconventional play of the valiant Wolverines. I do not deny that watching the valiant Wolverines under the leadership of junior quarterback Denard "Shoelace" Robinson is often frustrating, sometimes infuriating, & very much unlike watching almost any other football squad. My father in particular railed against Shoelace's "fundamentally unsound" play, continuing at such length & with such venom that at last I had had enough & struck back viciously, reminding him of the habitual futility in which his alma mater, Purdue, labors on the gridiron, & pointing out the utter unfairness of his comparing the valiant Wolverines to the New England Patriots, an elite squad even amongst the other teams at the pinnacle of American football, the N.F.L. But as I reminded my father & instructed Bob, the paramount thing to keep in mind is that Shoelace & the boys get the job done far more often than not. The valiant Wolverines might not be pretty, but they are winners, this year prevailing in eleven out of thirteen contests (a feat unequaled anywhere in the annals of ill-starred Boilermaker football). If fans can never be sure what to expect from Michigan, neither can the Maize & Blue's opponents. There is much to be said for aesthetics, much to be said for conforming to the traditional view of fundamentally sound football, but at the end of the day we are Americans, & as Americans we embrace General MacArthur's words about war, applying them to virtually all circumstances: "there is no substitute for victory." The valiant Wolverines played inconsistently, & downright poorly for long stretches of the game against the epithetless Hokies, but well enough to thwart Virginia Tech. time & again. Shoelace was at his improvisational best when the valiant Wolverines needed points, showing the signature flair of making something from nothing that has endeared him to every Michigan man. In the end, special teams play was the margin of victory, something that would have been unimaginable under Coach Rodriguez, who neglected the specials teams as severely as he did the defense. The Sugar Bowl might have been disappointing to anyone who thought Brady Hoke's arrival would mark an immediately return to the days of yore, to "three yards & a cloud of dust," but it was the perfect send-off for the 2011 squad of the valiant Wolverines. Well done, men! "The team, the team, the team."

In the final poll, released after the appallingly dull "B.C.S. Bowl," Michigan was № 12, Virginia Tech № 21. (As always, we here at The Secret Base adhere to the Associated Press poll, even if the Coaches' Poll rates the valiant Wolverines more highly.) Eleven wins, a B.C.S. bowl, a bowl victory, &, best of all, a reunified Maize & Blue faithful. "This is Michigan," indeed.

Go Blue!

The Queue
Recently
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin In the Land of the Soviets & Cigars of the Pharaoh
Stephen Weiner, Jason Hall, & Victoria Blake, illustrated by Mike Mignola, et al., Hellboy: The Companion
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Calculus Affair, The Red Sea Sharks, & Tintin in Tibet

Currently
Henry Mazzeo, ed., & Edward Gorey, illustrator, Hauntings: Tales of the Supernatural
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Castafiore Emerald, Flight 714, & Tintin and the Picaros

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Groundhog Day
Reel Big Fish, "'Til I Hit the Ground" from Monkeys For Nothin' and the Chimps For Free (T.L.A.M.)

2012-02-01T20:22:00.009-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXX - The Giant's Causeway, Northern Ireland.

The Giant's Causeway is in Northern Ireland, a constituent nation of the United Kingdom. My recent visit to the Emerald Isle was to the Republic of Ireland & I did not see the Giant's Causeway, alas.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Allister, "Fraggle Rawk" from Dead Ends and Girlfriends (T.L.A.M.)

2012-01-31T20:56:00.006-05:00

Project PARRAFIN
Project PARAFFIN begins upon the morrow, ready or not. The dark bastard is confident, regarding failure as inevitable. For this I thank him, as spite will serve as an additional motivation. My thanks infuriate him to no end, but he's no one to blame but himself, for he understands as well as I do that by tempting Mankind Old Scratch serves the Lord's purpose, & should have known enough not to be similarly ensnared. I've been waiting for tomorrow my whole life. It's finally here. I'm terrified. I'm excited. I might throw up. I do this for myself. I do this to spite myself. I do this for her.

Grow or die.

The Queue
On the flights to & from Ireland, I supplemented Hellboy: The Companion with a pair of issues of The Economist. Sweet fancy Moses, I love The Economist!

Recently
Tiziano Sclavi, et al., The Dylan Dog Case Files
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin In the Land of the Soviets & Cigars of the Pharaoh
Stephen Weiner, Jason Hall, & Victoria Blake, illustrated by Mike Mignola, et al., Hellboy: The Companion

Currently
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Calculus Affair, The Red Sea Sharks, & Tintin in Tibet
Henry Mazzeo, ed., & Edward Gorey, illustrator, Hauntings: Tales of the Supernatural

Presently
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Castafiore Emerald, Flight 714, & Tintin and the Picaros
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Bill Conti, "Gonna Fly Now" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Gonna Fly Now" is, of course, the theme song from Rocky.

Montag, 30 Januar
Fountains of Wayne, "Michael and Heather at the Baggage Claim" from Traffic and Weather (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Michael and Heather may never get home again."

Sonntag, 29 Januar
Flogging Molly, "Selfish Man" from Swagger (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The soundtrack to Irish pubs, at least in Dublin's city center, is American pop music, the same as you'd heard on any oldies or Top 40 station. At last, we thought we'd found an Irish pub playing Irish music, but I had to play the party pooper by pointing out that Flogging Molly is an American band.

"Propelled through all this madness
By your beauty and my sadness,
I'll never change or rearrange
'Til I've finished what I've started."

Samstag, 28 Januar
Katiä, "The Minstrel Boy" from Can't Stop the Love Sled (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"Thy songs were made for the pure and free,
They shall never be sung in slavery."

Freitag, 27 Januar
Boots Randolph, "Yakety Sax" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Yakety Sax" is the perfect music to play over the scene of a mob of irate Irishmen chasing a trio of Americans who have just devoured—literally eaten—the Book of Kells.

Donnerstag, 26 Januar
Mick Maloney, "There Were Roses" from Green Linnet Records: The Twentieth Anniversary Collection (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: An Irish debater took exception to my, as an American, discussion of recent Irish history. Nevermind the fact that at least half of the debate motions specifically mentioned the United States. So, they can speak about our history & our politics, but we cannot speak about their history & their politics? This must the European broadmindedness I've heard so much about.

"So my song for you this evening, it's not to make you sad,
Nor for adding to the sorrows of our troubled northern land…"

Mittwoch, 25 Januar
Tim Lyons, "Humours of Whiskey" from Green Linnet Records: The Twentieth Anniversary Collection (T.L.A.M.)

Dienstag, 24 Januar
Mu330, "Ireland" from Crab Rangoon (T.L.A.M.)

2012-01-23T12:34:00.005-05:00

Gone fishin'. Back at the end o' the month.

Proud Europa: Never Again
Alas, a most sincere & despondent alas, why would this—Juden-link—surprise anyone? Anti-Semitism has been on the rise in Europe for years, for my whole lifetime or more. This anti-Semitism has been tolerated, coddled & encouraged even, as long as it has disguised itself as anti-Israeli sentiment, as opposition to "Zionism" (in these cases "Zionism" doesn't refer to actual Zionism, but is a code word for all Jews everywhere). When "respectable" opinion embraces the old prejudices, who can be surprised when the fringe hatemongers read between the lines that they've been given the "all clear" to spew their vitriol? Do not be surprised the next time you read of a high-profile European politician commenting after a horrific act of anti-Semitic violence, "This is terrible, of course, but one has only to look to the crisis in Palestine before one realizes that the Zionists have in a way brought all this upon themselves."

The United States must stand shoulder-to-shoulder with the State of Israel, because no one else will. People of good will everywhere must mobilize to fight the deep well of anti-Semitism in the Muslim world & to check & reverse the renewal of anti-Semitism throughout Christendom. Never again can we stand & hold our peace as the pogroms & the expulsions begin again; never again.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, "Leaving on a Jet Plane" from Have a Ball (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis still true after all these years: Were I to see a girl wearing a short skirt & a Me First and the Gimme Gimmes T-shirt & drinking a Jones Soda, I'd ask for her hand in marriage on the spot.

"A short skirt,
A Gimmes shirt,
A Jones Soda,
Ain't life grand?"

2012-01-22T22:23:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Less Than Jake, "Can't Yell Any Louder" from Greetings From Less Than Jake (T.L.A.M.)

2012-01-21T13:08:00.009-05:00

The Queue
I've a yen for a good mummy story, a yen that The Jewel of Seven Stars did not sate. I borrowed Hauntings in order to read Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's short story, "Lot № 249." It was much more along the lines of what I'm looking for, mummywise, but the yen is not yet quenched; thus, the search continues. In the meantime, there is a story in Hauntings by H. G. Wells, of whose work I've read no more than the first paragraph of The War of the Worlds, & several authors who've been mentioned as influential to author & artist Mike Mignola in the creation & development of the Hellboy universe, amongst them Manly Wade Wellman & H. P. Lovecraft. It's the sampler! Everybody loves the sampler!

Recently
Bram Stoker, The Jewel of Seven Stars
Tiziano Sclavi, et al., The Dylan Dog Case Files
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: In the Land of the Soviets & The Adventures of Tintin: Cigars of the Pharaoh

Currently
Henry Mazzeo, ed., & Edward Gorey, illustrator, Hauntings: Tales of the Supernatural

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Sublime, "Santeria" from Sublime (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The Loose Ties didn't cover "Santeria," but the Soggy Bottom Bar did play Sublime's signature tune over the house speakers as soon as my favorite local ska kids had finished their show. Jojo squealed in delight, "I love this song!," & we remained on the dance floor, swaying together to the beat.

Freitag, 20 Januar
Reel Big Fish, "The Set Up (You Need This)" from Why Do They Rock So Hard? (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The Loose Ties unveiled their cover of "The Set Up" last night, prompting the R.B.D.S.O.T.D. Their "The Set Up" was rough, brutal even, but it'll be a great addition to their set once it's a little more polished. You need this, confound it!

Donnerstag, 19 Januar
Steve Martin & The Steep Canyon Rangers, "King Tut" (live) via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Have I mentioned how brilliant Steve Martin is? I shall have to add his autobiography, Born Standing Up, to the queue sooner rather than later.

2012-01-18T19:45:00.003-05:00

This Week in Motorsport
By Endurance We Conquer
Drat! Peugeot-link Un & Peugeot-link Deux. My first reaction upon reading the article hyperlinked here as "Peugeot-link Un" was to instinctively quote Dr. Horrible; I reflexively muttered, "Balls!"

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Blue Van, "Independence' via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: In what is becoming a minor Secret Base tradition, we welcome new episodes of Royal Pains with it's theme song, "Independence," as the R.B.D.S.O.T.D.

2012-01-17T23:33:00.003-05:00

The Victors: Project OSPREY
(№ 20) Michigan 60-59 Michigan State (№ 9)
15-4, Big Ten 5-2

The best thing about tonight's victory is that the valiant Wolverines prevailed against the dastardly Spartans. The second best thing about tonight's victory is that 'twas the valiant Wolverines' third consecutive triumph over the dastardly Spartans. The third best thing about tonight's victory is that 'twas over a Top 10 team. The fourth best thing about tonight's victory is that the valiant Wolverines would have cruised to victory if they hadn't missed almost all of their numerous three-point shots in the second half; as it was, the Maize & Blue shows true grit in pulling off the nail-biter. An ideal game it was not, but any victory over the dastardly Spartans, our "little brothers," is sweet. A third victory in a row is sweeter still.

Go Blue!

Ye Olde Interweb
Regarding the impending Wikipedia blackout, I do not know who is in the right about the virtues or vices of S.O.P.A./P.I.P.A., Hollywood or Silicon Valley, but I do know that I am going to be deprived of a website that I use daily & enjoy greatly not because of an act of the Congress, nor because of anything done by the Motion Picture Academy of America, but because of decisions taken by Jimmy Wales & the Wikimedia Foundation. The only people responsible for the looming Wikipedia blackout are the stewards of Wikipedia. I do not know if they are in the right in the opposition to the legislation currently making its way through the Congress, but they are absolutely in the wrong to use you & me & everyone else who uses Wikipedia as pawns in their publicity stunt. For shame, Wikimedia Foundation!

The Queue
Recently
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore, or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire
Bram Stoker, The Jewel of Seven Stars
Tiziano Sclavi, et al., The Dylan Dog Case Files

Currently
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: In the Land of the Soviets & The Adventures of Tintin: Cigars of the Pharaoh

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, "The Horse Shoe and the Rabbit's Foot" from The Magic of Youth (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: In the lyrics in the liner notes, the word is given as "horseshoe," but in the title it is "horse shoe." Is there some hidden meaning? Or is this nothing more than a typo?

"I believe the sharkskin and the tortoiseshell,
I believe the houndstooth and the herringbone,
I believe the horseshoe and the rabbit's foot,
And in the morning everything will be all right."

2012-01-16T17:55:00.009-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXIX - The Sedlec Ossuary, Kutná Hora, Czech Republic.

Project PARAFFIN
Tier 1 of Project PARAFFIN has been rescheduled from 1 January-31 December 2012 to 1 February 2012-31 January 2013. One thirty-one-day month (January '12) has been exchanged for another thirty-one-day month (January '13) & under the new schedule the crucial final deadline phase will not coincide with the notoriously unproductive Thanksgiving-Yuletide-New Year's holiday season. The finishing touches are being put on Tier 1 of Project PALINDROME ahead of my departure next week for parts unknown; so, the board should be clear for PARAFFIN upon my triumphant return.

Grow or die.

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Martin Luther King, Junior, excerpt from the "I Have a Dream" speech from Plea for Peace (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "I would like to discuss some of the problems that we confront in the world today & some of the problems that we confront in our own nation, by using as a subject the American Dream. Now, I choose this subject because America is essentially a dream. It is a dream of a land where men of all races, of all nationalities, & of all creeds can live together as brothers."

Sonntag, 15 Januar
She & Him, "Baby, It's Cold Outside" from A Very She & Him Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The fifth & final nominee for 2011 Album of the Year was A Very She & Him Christmas. I chose "Baby, It's Cold Outside" as the album's representative R.B.D.S.O.T.D. for three reasons, aside from its innate qualities as a song. One, it's the only non-Christmas specific song on the album. Two, I am mightily impressed that Miss Deschanel & Mr. Ward were able to differentiate their version from her now famous duet with Leon Redbone from the soundtrack to the motion picture Elf. Three, it was, at long last, cold as a witch's tit yesterday. Hooray for winter!

2012-01-14T15:19:00.005-05:00

Prior to yesterday, no comment had been left at The Secret Base since 18 December last year. I was beginning to ponder how best to mark, on 18 January, one month since the last comment when the California Dreamer & Daddy Dylweed commented independently on different posts. As to my reaction, I'm torn. I am always appreciative of comments (& wish I knew the magic formula for attracting more of them), but I was kind of looking forward toward marking a big deal out of the sad, pathetic commemoration of a month without comments. I'll cater to both impulses: genuine thanks to the Dreamer & Dylweed for their continued readership & engagement with The Secret Base & sarcastic thanks to the same pair for ruining my proposed pity party. Thanks, guys!

The Victors: Project OSPREY
Iowa 75-59 Michigan (№ 13)
14-4, Big Ten 4-2

Well, that was awful. All things considered, we were very lucky to lose by only sixteen points. The valiant Wolverines played lackadaisical defense & inept offense; so, a loss by twenty or thirty points was well within the realm of possibility. The valiant Wolverines played a textbook perfect game to defeat the pesky Badgers last weekend, but then this week needed overtime time to squeak past the plucky Wildcats before offering only token resistance to the tenacious Hawkeyes this afternoon. All this augurs ill for the coming week's contest against the dastardly Spartans, the "hope" being that the valiant Wolverines aren't as bad as they appear but are simply spoilt brats who think it beneath their station to play their best against "lesser" foes like Northwestern & Iowa. (That we are in desperate straits is proved by my hoping that my own team is a crew of contemptible asses rather than unskilled buffoons.) I concede that I might be overreacting to one loss. The valiant Wolverines are 14-3, after all. But today's game was terribly disheartening, as we went from weakness to weakness, never putting up much of a fight against a not-so-good Iowa squad. My pessimism is also based in the knowledge that three of our next four games are against mighty Michigan State, Purdue, & Ohio State; so, unless the valiant Wolverines can pull themselves together quickly & start playing more consistently we could very swiftly find ourselves at .500 in Big Ten play. *gulp*

Go Blue!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Aquabats!, "Poppin' a Wheelie!" from Hi-Five Soup! (Captain Thumbs-up)

Commentary: It is a tribute to The Aquabats! that even though I miss their vintage '90s ska sound like a deposed monarch misses his throne, Hi-Five Soup! was still a finalist for 2011 Album of the Year.

"But I love love love love love love poppin' a wheelie!"

2012-01-13T22:11:00.005-05:00

Project MERCATOR
My plan for the evening was to motor down to Royal Oak for a poker night (though I suspect 'twas to be a "poker" night instead, with that deplorable bore Texas Hold 'Em in place of actual poker) hosted by my old chum the Anonymous Friend, but he informed me this afternoon that he'd had quite a number of cancellations & was putting the kibosh on the evening. I was still welcome to come down, but in light of the snow on the roads & my plan to motor to Detroit proper for the North American International Auto Show on Sunday I decided to remain closer to home. At home, in fact, dinner being late enough to quell any thoughts of attending this month's downtown Flinttown Art Walk. So, here I sit, on Friday night, having just watched the new episode of Grimm, bloggy blogging & having an I.M. chat with a nascent chum from the History Club I shall code name The Steampunk. It's a full life.

Perchance to Dream
I had a nightmare on Thursday morning. Well, perhaps it is better labelled a dream, because it wasn't unduly terrifying 'til I awoke. In the dream, a wee demon attacked a man & ate the poor fellow's face. The demon was a small, chubby humanoid, like a putto, but with large, leathery wings, like a bat's. The whole exterior of the demon was charred, like a bratwurst that has been left too long on the backyard flames. A frightening creature, but the eating of the poor chap's face wasn't graphic, the body of the demon blocking my view of anything dreadful. The trouble came when my first alarm clock shocked me into the waking world. The machine is located at the foot of my bed, & I have to come out from under the covers & swing around to reach it. I sweep my legs low to the floor, without quite touching it, in the course of this maneuver, & that is where I was given pause on Thursday morn. In my half-awake state, the notion suddenly struck me that the demon from my dream, as well as it's similarly charred but much larger mother, might well be lurking under my bed. Under my bed. I haven't thought there might be anything under my bed since I was in elementary school & feared there was a panther down there. (Not a generic monster, but the very specific image of a panther, its fur midnight black.) Even groggy as I was my rational mind revolted against the absurdity of there being anything nefarious, much less a figment of my dreamy imagination, lying in wait under my bed to menace my dangling legs, & a torrent of venom was soon being hurled at that corner of my mind that had sounded the alarum. I executed the swinging maneuver, a reasonably complex ballet that I can execute almost literally in my sleep, but even as I knew—I KNEW!—there was no danger from a charred putto demon, the echoes of that original burst of terror lingered.

"For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause."
—William Shakespeare, The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, Act III, Scene I

2012-01-13T13:04:00.003-05:00

The Queue
The Dylan Dog Case Files is a collection of a Dark Horse miniseries republication of the Italian comic book Dylan Dog, written principally by Tiziano Sclavi & drawn by a clutch of different artists. Though I've previously exempted comics books from listing in "The Queue," Case Files is nigh-on seven hundred pages long, fully qualifying as a book for our purposes. Though mindful that it has a due date by which it must be returned to the library, I ~~shall take~~ took my (newly) usual interlude to read some of my backlog of Hellboy & B.P.R.D. comics. Once I'm caught up on those, I've a backlog of Usagi Yojimbo that requires attention.

Recently
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore, or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire
Bram Stoker, The Jewel of Seven Stars

Currently
Tiziano Sclavi, et al., The Dylan Dog Case Files

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Brian Carpenter's Ghost Train Orchestra, "Mojo Strut" from Hothouse Stomp: The Music of 1920s Chicago and Harlem (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Hothouse Stomp was another finalist for my 2011 Album of the Year. The Ghost Train Orchestra sounds unlike anything else in my library, a gloriously delightful oddity.

2012-01-12T23:59:00.002-05:00

Filthy Lucre
Rare wisdom in an age of intemperate demagoguery & populist buffoonery: "The Dangers of Demonology"-link. To venture into the bailiwick of "Lies, Damned Lies, & the News," The Economist is the finest news outfit of which I am aware, bar none. I do not always agree with their collective editorial stance, but I agree heartily far more often than I disagree even minutely. A full-throated defense of the market's many virtues, that is what has been missing from our discourse ("our" in this context meaning all the Western liberal democracies) lo these last four gloomy years. Much has been made of the market's vices, & many of those criticisms have been valid, but it is good to be reminded of how central a rôle the development of markets has played in the unprecedented prosperity & peace that are the hallmarks of our age (even if we too often lose sight of those larger truths, focused as we are on the panics of the present). To the staff of The Economist I say: Hear, hear!

Hello, Kitty
It really is true, cats love to play with string.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Fountains of Wayne, "Cold Comfort Flowers" from Sky Full of Holes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Sky Full of Holes was a finalist for 2011 Album of the Year, & even though it didn't win it is in my estimation a most welcome addition to Fountains of Wayne's catalog. Keep up the good work, gentlemen!

2012-01-11T23:59:00.001-05:00

The Savage Wars of Peace
Why on Earth would the Obama Administration "strongly condemn" the assassination of a member of the Iran's Manhattan Project? War of Assassins-link. If the United States is responsible for the clandestine war being waged against the Iranian atom bomb program, as I fervently hope we are, we certainly should admit to no such thing; even if we aren't, which would be a shameful neglect of our national security, we certainly shouldn't condemn such a shadow war. If anything, even if the U.S. isn't behind this, we should act in such a way as to give the Iranians the impression that we are. The Islamic Republic of Iran is an enemy of the United States of America & has been for over thirty years. The blood of hundreds, if not thousands, of American soldiers & Marines is on the hands of the I.R.G. &/or Iranian-backed militias from the recently "concluded" Iraq War. At the very least, Washington owes Tehran a few dead atom-bombmakers as both a down payment on a future settling of accounts & as a warning that the West is in earnest when we say Persia will not be permitted to go nuclear.

The worst aspect of the ill-conceived condemnation is that it emanated from the National Security Council. I'd expect such drivel out of Foggy Bottom, sure, but the N.S.C.? How much longer must we endure having an executive branch that at every turn seeks to promote an image of American passivity & impotence?

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, "Sunday Afternoons on Wisdom Ave." from The Magic of Youth (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Today I named The Magic of Youth the 2011 Album of the Year on the B.T.W. Forums, & with the choice of the R.B.D.S.O.T.D. thus narrowed down to its eleven tracks "Sundays Afternoons on Wisdom Ave." just called to me. Sweet fancy Moses, I love The Mighty Mighty Bosstones!

2012-01-10T23:59:00.002-05:00

Vote for Kodos | Lies, Damned Lies, & the News
I shall say only this about the New Hampshire primary: Why would Republicans or affiliated right-wing "independent" voters care whom the Boston Globe endorsed? That makes no more sense than Democrats or affiliated left-wing "independent" voters caring whom The Weekly Standard endorses. If Beantown's leading rag endorsed a candidate in the Republican primary, as it did Governor Huntsman, it could only be for one of two reasons: {a} the editors thought Mr. Huntsman would have no chance against President Obama in the general election & hoped to induce G.O.P. voters to set up the weakest possible challenge to Mr. Obama, or {b} the editors thought that if by some chance Mr. Huntsman did triumph over Mr. Obama that the former governor of Utah would conduct his administration in the fashion farthest to the left of any of the potential Republicans. There is much to like in what Governor Huntsman says, as well as much to dislike, but the question remains unanswered: What is it about Huntsman that makes him so relatively well-liked by those on the Left & viewed with such narrowed eyes by those on the Right?

Onward to South Carolina, where Speaker Gingrich will continue to act as a proxy for the Obama campaign, testing & honing arguments against Governor Romney for the general election.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The House Band, "Pharaoh" from Green Linnet Records: The Twentieth Anniversary Collection (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I'm sure today's R.B.D.S.O.T.D. selection has naught to do with the fact that I'm currently reading Bram Stoker's mummy horror novel The Jewel of Seven Stars.

"And it's Egypt land, Egypt land,
We're all livin' in Egypt land,
Tell me, brother, don't you understand?
We're all workin' for the pharaoh."

2012-01-09T17:53:00.003-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXVIII - The Old Jewish Cemetery, Josefov, Prague.

The Victors: Project OSPREY
(№ 16) Michigan 59-41 Wisconsin (№ 18)
13-3, Big Ten 3-1

I didn't see yesterday's game because my father preferred to have the No Fun League playoffs on in the background as we took down the Christmas decorations, a peculiar preference given that he follows the N.F.L. only very casually. Nonetheless, hooray! Sure, the pesky Badgers are not the pesky Badgers of old; nor was the game in their home area, the Kohl Center, wherein they are remarkably dominant; but 'twas still a profound arse-kicking by the valiant Wolverines. In the most recent pole, released today, Wisconsin fell out of the Top 25 whilst Michigan was promoted to № 13.

Go Blue!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Steve Martin & The Toot Uncommons, "King Tut" (live) via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

2012-01-08T23:29:00.000-05:00

"WILDLIFE CLASS.
A dignity of dragons.
…
A lunacy of werewolves.
…
UNDEAD CLASS.
A liberty of mummies.
A craving of golems.
…
A basement of vampires."
—from David Malki's Wondermark, #566

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Epiphany Sunday
Toby Keith, "We Three Kings" from (iTunes's free) Holiday Sampler (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Today was Epiphany Sunday, later even than the Epiphany. The Christmastide is truly over & taking down the Christmas decorations could be put off no longer. The halls are decked no more; the house is less colorful, feels emptier. 'Twas a good Christmastide & I am sorry to see it go, but time & tide wait for no man. 'Til next Advent, dear readers, merry Christmas!

"King forever, ceasing never,
Over us all to reign."

2012-01-07T17:23:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Mexicani Marimba Band, "Twelve Days of Christmas" from (iTunes's free) Holiday Sampler (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: All twelve days of the Christmastide have passed, but I'm not going miss this chance to select "Twelve Days of Christmas" as the R.B.D.S.O.T.D., exploiting the unofficial extension of the Christmastide due to the delay 'twixt the Epiphany & the celebration of Epiphany Sunday while simultaneously preserving the Secret Base tradition of choosing sacred music during all twelve days of the Christmastide. Win-win!

2012-01-06T19:57:00.002-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Epiphany
Barenaked Ladies & Sarah McLachlan, "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen/We Three Kings" from Barenaked for the Holidays (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Tidings of comfort and joy."

2012-01-05T21:01:00.007-05:00

Project PALINDROME | Project PARAFFIN
I've not yet begun work on the latter because I've not yet completed work on the former. One of these years I'll learn that 31 December is the worst day of the year for any kind of creative deadline, because there are simply too many competing demands for one's attention & energy, making December the least productive month of the year. It's January now, Mike, time to shrug off this holiday hangover.

Grow or die.

Also, I might make the deadline for Project PARAFFIN 31 January 2013, instead of 31 December 2012.

He's Dead, Jim
My father is getting over a cold. My mother is in the midst of a cold. I'm getting a cold. I don't mind this nearly so much as I mind the incessant sunshine & springlike temperatures that are making this the worst winter I've known. (The unseasonable weather isn't a health issue, but it seemed apropos enough given that "He's Dead, Jim" consists mostly of grousing.)

Coming Attractions
{a} "Project MERCATOR" - enormous holiday kith & kin edition
{b} "Autobahn" - the joys & perils of motoring to & from the Mississippi River
{c} ~~"The Victors: Sugar Bowl Special"~~
{d} "This Week in Motorsport" - to my shame, I still owe you the end of the Formula One season
{e} "The Loot" - I never got around to cataloging the haul from my last birthday, but the same sorry fate shan't befall my Yuletide loot

Yes, yes, I know, enough with writing about what I'm going to write, get down to it & just write. Jawohl!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Twelfth Day of Christmas
Sufjan Stevens, "We Three Kings" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"We three kings of Orient are,
Bearing gifts we traveled so far,
Field and fountain, moor and mountain,
Following yonder star.

O star of wonder, star of night,
Star with royal beauty bright,
Westward leading, still proceeding,
Guide us to they perfect light."

2012-01-04T23:21:00.003-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Eleventh Day of Christmas
The Klezmonauts, "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2012-01-03T17:45:00.003-05:00

The Victors
My mother is hosting her monthly game of bunco at our house this evening. When my father & I learned of this alarming development last month, we stammered, "But… but… but that's the night of the Sugar Bowl!" I admire the long-term success of her bunco club & have no objection to her playing hostess, but the timing is diabolical. I wouldn't give a tinker's damn for the Sugar Bowl were it not for the valiant Wolverines' participation, but I have a vested interest in the Sugar Bowl given the fact—inconvenient though it may be to the bunco ladies—of the valiant Wolverines' participation. A solution, unsatisfactory but sufficient, has been found & we are going to watch the game in the home of my mom's best friend, herself a member of the bunco club, alongside her husband, himself a friend of our family of long standing. All's well that ends well; now the only worry is the game itself.

Go Blue!

The Queue
You'll note that I've removed the backissues of Hellboy & B.P.R.D., et al., from all three divisions of the queue. I haven't stopped reading my accumulation of comic books & intend to continue reading them 'twixt prose books, but I've been reminded that they are read so quickly that to list them alongside the prose is to distort "The Queue's" reporting function. During the last week, when my time was filled with kith & kin, my travels were far & many, & I didn't have a chance to get to the library to borrow The Jewel of Seven Stars, I read four B.P.R.D. miniseries & one Hellboy miniseries & several one-shots. I love what used to be called "the Hellboy universe" & is increasingly known as "the Mignolaverse."

Recently
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore, or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire

Currently
Bram Stoker, The Jewel of Seven Stars

Presently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Ninth & Tenth Days of Christmas
The Klezmonauts, "We Three Kings of Orient Are" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I adore "We Three Kings," but strive to husband it 'til near the end o' the Christmastide, when the Epiphany commemorates the homage paid to the Christ by the Magi.

Montag, 2 Januar
Sufjan Stevens, "Once in Royal David's City" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: For clarity's sake, since "Once in Royal David's City" appears twice on Sings for Christmas, today's R.B.D.S.O.T.D. is the 3:40 version with lyrics, not the 2:01 instrumental rendition.

2012-01-01T00:24:00.002-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Eighth Day of Christmas
Duvall, "O Come All Ye Faithful" from O Holy Night (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him
Christ the Lord."

2011-12-31T12:34:00.001-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Seventh Day of Christmas
Mu330, "Angels We Have Heard On High" from Winter Wonderland (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-30T00:21:00.001-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Sixth Day of Christmas
Duvall, "Away in a Manger" from O Holy Night (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-29T12:34:00.003-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Fifth Day of Christmas
The Klezmonauts, "Little Drummer Boy" from ?Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-28T12:34:00.001-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Fourth Day of Christmas
Sufjan Stevens, "What Child is This Anyway?" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis the Feast of the Innocents, those blameless infants who were slaughtered that the Christ Child might never attain the dignity of His Kingdom. The Christ was born that all Mankind might be saved—past, present, & future.

2011-12-27T12:34:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Third Day of Christmas
The Klezmonauts, "Joy to the World" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-26T16:51:00.004-05:00

The Queue
All things considered, I'd rather have read Baltimore as a comic book than an illustrated novel. It was so similar in tone to Maestro Mignola's Hellboy & B.P.R.D. comic book stories that it cried out for more of his powerful, atmospheric artwork.

Recently
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
Mike Mignola & Ben Stenbeck, Sir Edward Grey, Witchfinder: In the Service of Angels
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore, or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire

Currently
Mike Mignola, John Arcudi, & Guy Davis, B.P.R.D.: King of Fear

Presently
Bram Stoker, The Jewel of Seven Stars
Mike Mignola, John Arcudi, & Guy Davis, B.P.R.D.: Hell on Earth—New World
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes
Mike Mignola, John Arcudi, & Guy Davis, B.P.R.D.: Hell on Earth—Gods
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

2011-12-26T12:44:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Second Day of Christmas
Nat King Cole, "Joy to the World" from Christmas with Big Crosby, Nat King Cole, & Dean Martin (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis the Feast of Saint Stephen the Protomartyr. 'Tis also Boxing Day, a secular holiday with roots in Saint Stephen's Day & dedicated to charitable giving. The Christmastide yet runs for another week & a half, treasured readers. The Christ Child, He whom the prophet Isaiah called "Wonder-Counselor," is born. Make merry!

"He rules the world
With truth and grace…."

2011-12-25T08:00:00.000-05:00

Operation AXIOM
Merry Christmas to all, the Christ is born! Peace on Earth & goodwill towards Man! Of course, Christmas Day is the exclusive preserve of family, so these lines aren't being actually composed on Christmas Day. Nor do I expect that they'll be read on Christmas Day. No, they're being typed days in advance, & set to be published automatically by the friendly robots at Blogger (not nearly so friendly since they were bought by the evil empire that is Google, but still). I hope that each of you was nice rather than naughty over the course of the past year, & that Santa Claus rewarded you accordingly. Pray take a moment, amidst all the presents & the familial love & the return of the N.B.A., to reflect upon the momentous occasion that we mark today, the Mass we celebrate to illuminate our joy at the birth of the Christ. The Lord Almighty, Creator of Heaven & Earth, came down amongst us, not with an earth-shaking voice & His Terrible Majesty, but as a wee babe, tender & mild, born not in a palace mighty but a stable filthy. He came with mercy beyond our comprehension, to take upon His sinless breast all the sin of Mankind—past, present, & future—& to trade His life for ours. He is the King of Kings, the Redeemer of all the world; His Kingdom will stand throughout all eternity, & yet He came into the world as we all come into the world, naked & cold, screaming for air. A perfect & perfectly normal human baby, & yet at the same time the Creator of Time & Space, infinite, without beginning or end. Today we celebrate the birth of the Christ, the birth of hope & our salvation. If that's not a reason to be merry, I don't know what is. Merry Christmas! "God bless us, every one!"

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXVII - Old Sarum, original site of the English town of Salisbury, & prior to the Great Reform Act of 1832 the rottenest of the rotten boroughs.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Christmas Day
Sufjan Stevens, "Holy, Holy, Holy" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-24T17:26:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Christmas Eve
The Puppini Sisters, "O Holy Night" from Christmas with The Puppini Sisters (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"Fall on your knees! O hear the angels' voices!
O night divine, O night when Christ was born;
O night divine, O night, O night divine.

Christ is the Lord! O praise His Name forever!
His power and glory evermore proclaim;
His power and glory evermore proclaim!"

2011-12-23T13:49:00.003-05:00

The Stars My Destination
Another Russian Soyuz rocket has suffered a catastrophic failure: "Major Tom (Coming Home)"-link. The silver lining to this dark cloud is that the failure is different from the failure which caused the loss of another Soyuz in August… meaning the problem might well be systemic to the Russian space program: Wayback Machine. Oh, wait, that's not a silver lining, that's a yet darker cloud. That means this failure is every worse news. The United States is entirely dependent upon the Russians to ferry our astronauts to & from the International Space Station, & yet Russian rockets are failing at an appalling rate for a wide variety of problems; fear not, though, because our helplessness & utter dependence on the Russians is exactly according to President Obama's plan. The reliability of the Russians was one of the keystones behind Mr. Obama's dual decisions to cancel Project Constellation & simultaneously retire the Space Shuttle fleet; alas, time has proved that the only thing the Russians do reliably is build rockets that fail.

"You know what… you know what I noticed? Nobody panics when things go 'according to plan.' Even if the plan is horrifying." Nobody panic, because President Obama's plan was always to be dependent on the Russians. Everything is therefore going according to plan. Even if the plan is horrifying.

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Louis Armstrong & The Commanders, "Cool Yule" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"He's gonna have a bag of crazy toys,
To give the groanies of the girls and boys,
So dig, Santa comes on big.
…
Have a Yule that's cool!"

2011-12-22T17:51:00.006-05:00

Project MERCATOR
Last Friday, now nearly a week hence, I collected Jojo from her house & piloted Lumi the Snow Queen into the heart of Flinttown to see The Loose Ties at the Soggy Bottom Bar (not just downtown Flint, but north of the river, where formerly mayor Woodrow Stanley once warned white suburbanites such as your humble narrator not to venture). Jojo broke off to take a seat with Farr Afield & T. B. Player while I claimed a barstool near Ska Army & Nick Andopolis. Much nonsense was discussed 'til the first band began their set, two chaps with guitars doing acoustic covers of '90s hits. It was quite charming, highlights including Oasis's "Wonderwall" & No Doubt's "Spiderwebs." When it came time for The Loose Ties to play, wow, they brought the fury. Not only did they play a double set, which well-nigh killed me, but they also debuted half a dozen new songs. New songs! I love The Loose Ties unconditionally, but they had been playing more or less the same set for the better part of two years. There were both covers & originals amongst the new songs & one of the originals, "She'll Never Know," is far & away the finest song they've written. Well done, lads & lasses!

On two occasions the evening flirted with Project PANDORA status. After spending a cigarette break outside with Jojo, with whom he went to high school, T. B. Player made the curious remark that everyone—he did not specify whom constituted "everyone"—was wondering when Jojo & I were going to get together (he did not specify romantically or sexually, so I choose the former). Jojo's expression was inscrutable, so I mildly chided T. B. Player that my friendship with Jojo is just that, a friendship, & nothing else. Jojo is a lovely girl, with a waifish beauty that draws the unwanted attentions of dirty old men, "creepers" in the modern vernacular; in other circumstances, I'd love to be seen with her on my arm, but these are not other circumstances for two very good reasons. The first is that the first time Jojo & I rendezvoused to socialize we had a somewhat odd discussion of an ex-boyfriend of hers & a relationship that lasted too long, which morphed into a discussion of the necessity of friends remaining friends, not trying to use friendship as a stepping stone to a romantic entanglement. To mine ears, the meaning of this discussion was quite clear. The second reason is that I've learnt the embarrassing lesson of my erstwhile misguided, damn' fool pursuit of The Impossible Ingenue. Jojo is simply too young for me & I am simply too old for her. I believe in the half-your-age-plus-seven rule with all the fervor of a penitent reprobate. I have no idea what prompted T. B. Player's remark, & it might well be entirely innocent, though of course the dark bastard sees conspiracy & ulterior motive everywhere.

The second occasion was less ambiguous. There was only a single bartender & no waitresses on duty; so, I had to go to the bar myself to get my first drink of the night. After receiving the outrageous news that they were all out of Guinness, whilst waiting for my consolation Heineken, a lovely raven-haired girl in spectacles turned to me & struck up a conversation. We traded a few humorous observations & parted with broad smiles on both our faces when I disengaged to rejoin my party. Later, once The Loose Ties had begun the first of their two sets, I was skanking along in rhythm when suddenly the bespectacled girl appeared at my side. She watched my feet & then made a halting first stab at skanking. Her girl friend was alongside her & a pair of chaps materialized also. For a few moments, half a dozen of us were skanking to the beat. She would come & go from the dance floor, never staying for more than one song, but always with her ruby lips parted into a smile. (Late in the first set, not long before intermission, Jojo was standing alongside me when a dirty old man at the bar sent the bartender to buy her a drink; she's not of legal drinking age, but said she'd left her I.D. out in the car & got a Coke. I didn't know a creeper had sent the drink 'til later, when I drove her home.) I approached her at the bar in between sets & told her she was a natural at skanking. We introduced ourselves, but true to form I promptly forget her name, even as I couldn't take my eyes off her smile. A few songs into the second set, she again returned to the dance floor & stayed after the song ended. I didn't put a lot of thought into what came next, I simply acted. (On instinct? I don't know. I tend to think that like George Costanza all my instincts are wrong; so, the opposite would have to be right, but that might well be the dark bastard talking.) As we stood next to each other, I slide my left arm behind her back & gently rested my hand on her waist. By way of asking her out, I leaned in & said, "How about I give you my number?" She extended her left arm & brought it to where I could get a clear glimpse of her ring finger & the giant rock perched there. I did not take the time to see if there was also a wedding ring there or just the engagement ring. I leaned in & said, "How about we pretend I never said that?" as I withdrew my hand from her waist & my arm from around her back. No harm, no foul, as she came back after a very short return to the bar & we slow danced (spins & the like, no cheek-to-cheek) during the reggae ballad "Drinking for Eleven." I might not know her name, but I do know that her fellow, whomever he is, is a lucky bloke.

Almost dead on my feet after skanking through twice the normal number of songs, I was glad that I'd parked on M.L.K. Boulevard directly in front of the Soggy Bottom's door. When I pulled into Jojo's driveway I warned her that I was "all gross," but she replied that everyone sweats & gave me our customary parting hug, holding on for slightly longer than normal before exiting.

Autobahn
The next night, Saturday, I again sallied forth to see The Loose Ties, this time at The Lunch Studio, hosted by the resurrected Flint Local 432. (The Local's new building is being renovated thanks to the fine folks at the Mott Foundation.) The weather outside was frightful, but the ska is so delightful & so I had somewhere to go. There was not as much grip as one might wish on I-475, but I was still making my way along without great difficulty until the esses, a long, sweeping righthand curve followed immediately by a slightly shorter, equally sweeping lefthander. In the summertime, when it's dry, those curves are a thrill, as you try to see just how fast you can take them, but they are a nightmare in the winter. As I entered the righthander, I saw cars pulled over to both right & left. Worse still, there was a jerk in the middle of the three lanes crawling along with his hazard lights flashing. I was in a curve that was covered with wet snow & hidden ice & I had no choice but to apply my breaks. I threaded the needle between the jerk with the hazards & the car pulled off to the lefthand shoulder, genuine white-knuckle driving. I had an easier time through the lefthand curve once the rolling chicane was out of my way & gingerly made my way over to the far right for my exit.

As Lumi the Snow Queen was heading up the off ramp, my mobile rang. My custom is not to answer my mobile whilst driving unless I have my hands-free headset, which I did not on this occasion, but for no discernible reason I made an exception in this case. I rolled to a stop at the red light at the end of the off ramp & flipped open my mobile to hear the unrecognizable voice of The M.A.P., my debate coach. The M.A.P. & his wife has been in a traffic collision! I first inquired as to their health & he assured me no one had been injured. My next thought was to ask if they needed me to fetch them from somewhere, as I imagined they were stranded on the side of the road. He asked where I was. I told him that I'd just arrived downtown. The M.A.P. asked me if I could give & his bride a ride home & I agreed without hesitation. Where should I pick them up? He asked me to meet them at a building on campus, to which I agreed while still puzzled as to how they were going to reach that particular destination. Ours is not to reason why, I suppose (with apologies to Lord Tennyson). I piloted Lumi the Snow Queen to the rendezvous spot, again flipped open my mobile, & called Ska Army. I asked him when The Loose Ties were going to go on & he specified a time about two hours into the future. Great, that would give me plenty of time to deliver my soon-to-be passengers & make it back to Flint. I informed him of the reason for my delay & his first reaction was to inquire after everyone's physical well being. Good on him. Perhaps ten minutes after I'd parked at the rendezvous spot, a Genesee County Sheriff's Department Paramedic S.U.V. pulled up behind Lumi. The M.A.P. & Mrs. The M.A.P. soon emerged, clearly shaken up by their wreck but otherwise none the worse for wear. After effusive thanks & the normal pleasantries, we were off.

We hadn't gone far along Robert T. Longway when we made a quick stop in order for her to use the water closet. The M.A.P. made jokes about my "owning" him now, being able to demand in future any favor it might be in his power to grant. I replied that I was doing no less than I'd want someone to do for me or my kith & kin should they be in the same situation. I tried to keep it light, joking & letting them lead the conversation, knowing firsthand the odd mental state one is in after an automobile collision. They were understandably nervous about the expressway since they'd been on I-69 when The M.A.P. hit a patch of ice, invisible in the dark of night, sending their S.U.V. spinning 360˚ before crunching its nose against the unyielding center barrier; so, we took the surface roads. I was playing my tape of The Blues Brothers' first album, Briefcase Full of Blues, & The M.A.P. asked, "Is this the Blues Brothers? I picked the right taxi to call." More conversation about music brought us to "Spiderwebs," an acoustic rendition of which I'd heard the night before at the Soggy Bottom, & Mrs. The M.A.P. & I engaged in some impromptu karaoke. The M.A.P. observed that if this was a debate trip this would be the point where he'd tell me to shut up, with which I agreed, but since the purpose of the off-key singing was to soothe his wife's jangled nerves I continued 'til it died a natural death.

I let them lead the meandering conversation, most of my mind being focused on the treacherous roads. Treasured readers, that night I'd traversed roads of which I was only vaguely aware beforehand & saw parts of Genesee County that I'd never before seen, & more likely than not will never see again. Eastward we plunged into the night, then left & north, then right & east again. A light fall of heavy, wet snowflakes danced in the beams from Lumi's headlights, the road glistening & black before me, an impenetrable, light-swallowing black behind. Onward & onward we plunged. Both my hands were locked onto the steering wheel, my eyes transfixed to the road, only occasionally darting to my mirrors before swiveling back to the far end of Lumi's headlight beams. Only once did we slide, while executing a lefthand turn, & even then only for the briefest of moments, but never was I more than vaguely confident in the adhesive power of the tarmac beneath Lumi's tires. I thanked the Lord Almighty for the four Michelins I bought before the Winter of '10-'11, because the bald rubber I'd been running on before then would surely have lead me into a ditch on such a forbidding drive. Onward & onward we plunged. The miles & the minutes ticked away without any real awareness on my part. I had no idea where we was going, no idea how much further we had yet to go. I turned when The M.A.P. instructed me to turn, my job being that of helmsman, not navigator; my job to keep us 'twixt the white line to my right & the yellow line to my left, & away from the rear bumper of the motorcar ahead, & not to worry about anything else.

I had no idea how long we'd been motoring until I turned on The M.A.P.'s driveway, one of those long, winding driveways snaking through the forest that you encounter with houses build in B.F.E. An hour & a quarter had passed since we left our rendezvous point, an hour & a quarter of claustrophobia, of plunging headlong into the dark unknown. Or is that the unknown dark? I parked next to their other motorcars; went inside for a few minutes to see their house & its high ceilings, oh & ah over their really quite impressive Christmas tree, use the W.C., & accept more effusive thanks; then I took my leave & prepared for the return journey. Almost. A slip of white paper on the carpet before the passenger seat caught my eye, & upon examination I saw it was from one of the responding lawmen. They might want their case file number, so I trudged back up to the house. We'd originally entered through the garage, the door of which was now closed. Their house is one of those where no one will ever use the front door, because they don't live on a proper street & don't have neighbors—everyone who approaches will do so from the side, from or through the garage. I made my way to the nearest back door, of which there was a multitude, & knocked. I heard The M.A.P. ask, "Is that you?" The answer would be yes no matter whom I was, but I know what he meant, & answered in the affirmative. He walked past my door heading toward the garage & I called him over to me. I handed him the slip of white paper & he all but smacked himself across the forehead. Departure, take two.

The inbound journey was less dramatic than had been the outbound leg. I resolved to chance the expressway & followed the last northbound road we'd taken (M-15, which The M.A.P. called exclusively by its own name, State Road) all the way down from Otisville—which everyone, myself included, mistakes for Ortonville, because no matter how podunk Ortonville may be (& is, unequivocally), it is a thriving metropolis compared to the one-horse hamlet that it Otisville—to Davison & I-69, in this instance referred to as "Civilization." The roads were still slick, but the snow had relented & there was a general sense that conditions were improving, however slightly. Not long into the journey I was keeping about thrice the usual distance to the S.U.V. ahead of me, allowing extra stopping distance, to the great consternation of the Jeep behind me. At the first opportunity he dove across the center line & passed Lumi the Snow Queen. He immediately slammed on his brakes, having not the slightest chance of passing any of the train of vehicles ahead of him. Jackass. Shortly before the caravan reached the big city of Davison, the Jeep flipped on his blinker & attempted a left turn. I saw attempted because he was carrying far too much speed & missed the corner. Only by the slightest of margins was he able to slam on his brakes & keep his Jeep out of the inviting ditch. When last I saw him he was parked across the northbound lane, too many cars heading southbound for him to back up & take the slight northward jog he needed to make his intended turn. I freely admit that I relished seeing him reap his comeuppance.

Once I was on I-69, I found it drier & safer than I-475 had been two hours earlier. I made my way back to Flint without incident, though the journey still took a solid forty minutes, the lion's share in the caravan on M-15. I parked along Saginaw Street about half a block from The Lunch Studio & walked in about five minutes before The Loose Ties took the stage. I exchanged greetings & pleasantries with my old Real Can of Yams bandmate The Duffmeister, the "damned, dirty lefty," & grabbed a Jones Soda out of the cooler courtesy of Joel, the main man behind the Flint Local 432 & an all around admirable fellow. The Aquabats! said it best, adventure today!

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
The Klezmonauts, "Deck the Halls" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-21T17:24:00.006-05:00

Urbi et Orbi
This post comes to you in response to a request left by Ki-El in response to a previous post. We here at The Secret Base are always striving to engage more closely with our readers & are thus delighted to fulfill such requests. Ki-El wrote, "I'm kind of curious to hear your thoughts on Pope Benedict's whole 'redistribution of wealth' speech."

On Friday, His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI gave a speech which included words to the effect that, & I couch in this manner because I'm unsure in what language the speech was actually delivered, society needed "adequate mechanisms for the redistribution of wealth." This is entirely consistent with the teachings & policies of Holy Mother Church. For at least the last hundred & fifty years, since the emergence of the competing philosophies of capitalism & socialism, the Catholic Church has been a critic of both. The Church disdains the concentration of wealth into the hands of the few, be they plutocratic capitalists or bureaucratic socialists, favoring instead diffuse ownership of the means of production, not through collective ownership but through individual ownership of small shares of the whole. Some thinkers have tried to synthesize various encyclicals & proclamations into a fully fleshed-out economic philosophy, known as distributism, a third way that stands opposed to the false binary choice between capitalism & socialism. There is nothing new in a pope calling for wealth to be distributed more evenly amongst the population. This would be good for both the physical welfare of the destitute & the spiritual welfare of the rich (note that in Scripture those who are richly rewarded in this world will be terribly punished in the next).

What are my thoughts on "adequate mechanisms for the redistribution of wealth"? I agree absolutely with the principle, even if you & I might quibble over the details. I believe in free-market capitalism as a pillar of our country's broader commitment to freedom of the individual, but just as society places reasonable restrictions on my freedoms—I cannot shout "Fire!" in a crowded theater, despite my freedom of speech—so too must there be protections against abuse & restrictions placed on even "free" markets. I am a Republican because I am a liberal, not a libertarian. (Liberalism, real liberalism, not the peculiar & frankly wrong American description of Leftism as "liberal.") I support the redistribution of wealth through mechanisms such as an old-age pension (in this country, Social Security) & a progressive tax scheme, wherein those in higher-income households pay a greater percentage of that income in taxes than do those in lower-income households. Do I want to see Social Security reformed? Yes, I do, because I think a number of reforms are needed both to ensure the solvency of the program & to make it a more effective means of ending poverty amongst the aged, its original purpose. Do I want to see a "flat" income tax or a nationwide sales tax such as the pernicious "FairTax"? No, I do not, because both of those policies, whilst supposedly based in "fairness," would both fail in their attempts to make both rich & poor pay an equal percentage of their treasure into the public coffers & would in fact create a regressive tax scheme whereby the least well-off amongst us would pay the highest share of their treasure in taxes. I do not think we should lower, let alone repeal, capital gains taxes, because to do so would merely shift a larger share of the public tax burden onto those in lower income households who derive most or all of their income through wages instead of capital gains. We need a complete rethink of our present day, Great Society-derived "welfare" system because all available evidence suggests that it is not alleviating poverty but instead creating a permanent underclass, generations of citizens who will forever be dependent upon Caesar for their bread. We need to redistribute wealth from the very rich to the very poor, not redistribute power from the town hall to the technocrats' committee room.

I favor minor, incremental changes to our present mixed economy, nothing that would be enough to transform our curious hybrid of capitalism & socialism into true distributism. This is in part because I'm not convinced distributism would work as smoothly & justly as its theorists theorize, & in part because I almost always favor gradual change so as to avoid the unpredictability & seemingly inevitable violence of revolution.

The redistribution of wealth is a right & just aim of public policy, good for both the body politic & the souls of the body politic. We might & probably would disagree about the proper degree of & mechanism for that redistribution, but that is precisely the purpose for which we have politics, to be the means through which we hash out those disagreements.

If these lines do not satisfy your curiosity, Ki-El, I'll be happy to take another stab at the issue. In the immortal words of Groucho Marx, "These are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others."

Bier!
I had a jones for Carlsberg yesterday, but none was to be found at my only known local source for Carlsberg. Curses! Not wishing to partake in the Samuel Adams Boston Lager my parents habitually keep on hand, after dinner I decided to have one of the bottles of Guinness Extra Stout I'd had sitting in the garage since an Epsilon gave them to me as repayment for a favor, even though Guinness Draught was the actual repayment he'd offered whilst pretending to having something beyond the most passing knowledge of Guinness. The Extra Stout wasn't as bad as I remembered, not at first, but the farther I got into the bottle the worse I was walloped by the dreadful aftertaste. The aftertaste lingered, & lingered, & lingered. Egad! At this point, I know I'm not going to drink the Extra Stout; so, it'll probably end up going down the drain, which would normally be a waste, but that sludge isn't fit for human consumption. I'd say it's a potent potable, but I'm not sure it should be considered potable.

The Queue
I've not purchased a comic book in a goodly while, but I still have quite a backlog of books I've not yet read from before the discipline necessary for Project RADIANT's success brought an end to that particular hobby. Both to keep me in a paranormal frame of mind to aid Project PARAFFIN & because I enjoy tales "From the pages of Hellboy" on their own merits, I've decided to intersperse comic book miniseries amongst the novels in the queue. When I exhaust my supply, the G.D.L. has a surprisingly complete library of trade paperback collections. Onward!

Baltimore is neither a comic book nor a collection, but "an illustrated novel." (Principally text with supplementary illustrations scattered here & there.) There are Baltimore comics that came after the debut novel; so, if that goes well they may well follow.

Recently
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
Mike Mignola & Ben Stenbeck, Sir Edward Grey, Witchfinder: In the Service of Angels

Currently
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore, or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire

Presently
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Mike Mignola, John Arcudi, & Guy Davis, B.P.R.D.: King of Fear
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Mike Mignola, John Arcudi, & Guy Davis, B.P.R.D.: Hell on Earth—New World
Edgar Rice Burroughs, Tarzan of the Apes

The Rebel Black Dot Hanukkah Song of the Day
Barenaked Ladies, "Hanukkah, Oh Hanukkah" from Barenaked for the Holidays (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-20T23:29:00.003-05:00

Autobahn
I saw a Fisker Karma today, not in motion but parked in front of the Buick/G.M.C. pavilion of the mammoth multiple-marque "Auto Plaza" motorcar dealership that spans damned near half a mile alongside South Saginaw Street in my beloved Grand Blanc. Quite eye-catching is Henrik Fisker's namesake. The Karma's extravagant price might help to explain why so many denizens of Genesee County's less affluent municipalities resent Grand Blanc as a enclave of wealth, privilege, & snobbery.

Later in the day I found myself motoring behind a Camaro painted in the most hideous shade of neon green. The vanity plate on the verdant eyesore? "GRRREEN." What a perfect encapsulation of why Mrs. Skeeter, Esq. remarked, when I told her of my fanciful desire to purchase a Camaro, that I should save myself quite a bit of money & just have made a T-shirt emblazoned with the word "Douchebag."

The Rebel Black Dot Hanukkah Song of the Day
Susan Egan "We Are Lights/Shalom Alaychem" from Winter Tracks (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-19T20:57:00.004-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
The Irish Rovers, "Good King Wenceslas" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: A semi-religious Yuletide carol encroaching on the secular songs' patch, 'tis true, but I'll allow it.

2011-12-18T13:55:00.012-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXVI - The ancient White Horse of Uffington.

Urbi et Orbi | The Savage Wars of Peace
Father Gary opened Mass today with a minute of silent reflection upon the "end of the Iraq War." Father Gary is a great old hippie priest, whose beliefs run far to the left of mainstream Catholic opinion, though he's so pacifistic I know he'd never join with those murderous lunatics who preach so-called "liberation theology" (a.k.a. "Catholic" Marxism). I know that Father Gary is in earnest in his wish for peace, & he was both morally & politically opposed to the war from the beginning, but I am puzzled by his celebration of the war's end, as I was all last week by the Forth Estate's celebrations of same. The war's over? Really? Tell that to the Iraqis who perish in the ongoing terrorist violence, the smoldering sectarian strife. Iraq's come a long way since the worst days of 2006-2007, but the fighting continues. The war is only over for America's fighting men & women, yet it continues for the Iraqis, the Iranians, & the foreign fighters who still enter the country seeking martyrdom. The war is over. How unpardonably insular of us, to think that if a war isn't killing our boys than it must not be happening at all. This attitude on the part of the press doesn't surprise me in the least, those jackals think of nothing beyond themselves, but I am surprised & a little disappointed that a man as concerned about the whole of Mankind as Father Gary would fall prey to that same nationalistic blindness.

The Queue
I'm tempted to read Christopher Moore's non-vampire novel A Dirty Job, set in the same continuity as the A Love Story series & involving some of the same characters (I freely admit I'm a sucker for a shared universe), but I've been dissuaded by the diminished rôle of the characters Jody Stroud & Tommy Flood & the usurpation of their pages by the far less interesting character Abby Normal. So, we move on.

I am uncertain what to read once the New Year arrives & Project PARAFFIN is upon us. Should I continue to read of the supernatural to keep me in the right frame of mind? Is that even the right frame of mind? Or with my writing focusing on vampires & the profane, should I look for something else in my reading, such as the splendid escapism of spy fiction? Perhaps I should re-read Dracula & Hellboy: Wake the Devil, the two best vampire stories I've encountered, the former having the added bonus of being an example of the epistolary form. Maybe I should read more Poe, to get a better sense of horror? The Moonstone, an early work of detective fiction & thus outside our bailiwick, but also another epistolary example? I must read whatever it takes, including next to nothing at all if it should come to that, to make a success of PARAFFIN.

Recently
Guillermo del Toro, Christopher Golden, & Troy Nixey, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story

Currently
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story

Presently
Mike Mignola & Christopher Golden, Baltimore; or, The Steadfast Tin Solder and the Vampire
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Songs of the Day
Sufjan Stevens, "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis the fourth & final Sunday of Advent, the Christmastide is nearly upon us. Another baptism at today's Mass, another prayer that the Holy Ghost will soften The L.A.W.'s & Brother-in-L.A.W.'s hearts so that The Squeak might be baptized into the Body of Christ, for the redemption of her immortal soul.

"O come, o come, Emmanuel,
And ransom captive Israel."

Samstag, 17 Dezember
Ella Fitzgerald, "Sleigh Ride" from Elf: Music from the Motion Picture (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"It's lovely weather
For a sleigh ride together
With you."

If only 'twas so. Last night was a miserable night to be out & about, as proved by my sojourn through windblown snow along icy roads to take The M.A.P. & his wife home after they had been in a traffic collision, their motorcar having spun on the ice & crashed into a barrier on the expressway. On their wedding anniversary, no less! I'd never before been so far into the wilderness of Genesee County as to reach Otisville, & 'twas very nearly the worst possible night for such a trip. That said, they needed my help; what other choice was there but to help, despite the peril? 'Twas an adventure.

Freitag, 16 Dezember
The Klezmonauts, "Jingle Bells" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Sung in, I assume, Yiddish.

2011-12-15T21:14:00.005-05:00

Happy Birthday!
Happiest of birthday wishes to my wee niece & faux goddaughter (or "godlessdaughter"), The Squeak! It is amazing, startling, & a little terrifying to see how swiftly she is growing up, already no longer a baby & on the cusp of being a real little girl. The Squeak talks up a storm, though its not always easy to understand what she's saying, especially as she still favors a pacifier (or "binky"). I love that little monkey to pieces, & it grieves me that I don't get to see her more often. Happy birthday, Natalie!

Urbi et Orbi
I bowled last Friday, which my chums from the History Club, & when asked later if I'd had a good time I replied as I always reply after bowling, "I'll say the same thing I always say after I go bowling, & it's as true now it it was then, 'I should go bowling more often.'" I gave my confession this evening, that is to say I partook of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. I'll say the same thing I always say after Reconciliation, I should go to confession more often. It does my soul palpable good.

This evening's was my first communal reconciliation service, more formally the Rite of Reconciliation of Several Penitents with Individual Confession & Absolution. The festivities kicked off much like a shortened Mass, but in place of the Eucharistic celebration there was communal reflection on the shortcomings of each of our attempts at lives of Christ-like imitation, & the splendor of His boundless mercy. After that, we queued & each give his individual confession, eight priests being scattered at discreet distances around the nave of Holy Family. (There was a similar service Tuesday night at my own parish, Holy Redeemer (H.R.), but I was exhausted by the time the evening rolled around, in no shape to make a proper confession of my many sins.) By chance, I confessed to my own pastoral vicar, Father Steve. Father Steve's penances are lighter than Father Tim's were when the latter ran H.R., but I don't mean to complain.

It seems that every parish is struggling with the new translation of the Roman Missal. Amongst other bits of new language & gesture,

Priest: "Peace be with you."
Parish: "And also with you."

is now

Priest: "Peace be with you."
Parish: "And with your spirit."

As Father Gary joked a few weeks back at Holy Redeemer, just give us forty years & we'll have it down pat.

Autobahn
Everywhere I look I'm seeing New Beetle convertibles—not New Beetle hardtops, only New Beetle ragtops. I've never understood why anyone would want a cabriolet, especially in a clime such as sacred Michigan's. Not only does a droptop expose the driver & his passengers to the death rays of the Accursed Sun, but in the winter it cannot provide nearly as much insulation as a fixed roof, making the interior of the vehicle that much colder at all hours of the day & night. Madness! Madness, I say!

Anywho, I had a telephone conversation last weekend about the end of the New Beetle/the arrival of the no-longer-New new Beetle. My conversational partner lamented the demise of the cut-as-a-button New Beetle. The cuteness was the only thing the New Beetle had going for it, I told him, & that wore thin after a few tears. 1998 is a long time gone, amigo; you can't live in the past. The new Beetle is a more viable alternative to the burgeoning lineup of Minis & the arrival of the Fiat 500 than the New Beetle, I insisted, but he'd hear none of it. I wasn't terribly invested in making the case for the new Beetle, as he was the one who brought up the topic in the first place, but it was still irksome that all he offered in refutation was, "Nuh-uh, it is way cuter!" (I paraphrase.) Since then, it's been convertible New Beetles everywhere I turn. Your guess is as good as mine.

Of course, there's no point in discussion the New Beetle, much less the New Beetle convertible, unless 'tis as a vehicle for this gem: Bill Briggs-link. This commercial remains a perfectly preserved moment in time, regardless of that earlier hogwash about not living in the past.

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Sufjan Stevens, "Jingle Bells" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Wishful thinking, as there is not enough—indeed, not any—snow on the ground for a ride in a one-horse open sleigh.

2011-12-14T16:19:00.006-05:00

Science!
I have long had a print hanging above my desk, a drawing of an anthropomorphic Space Shuttle being dragged along by the tremendous power of the rockets attached to its large central fuel tank. The print is titled Nantucket Sleighride, a reference explained in the text that accompanies the image:

Many years ago in new England, the term "Nantucket Sleighride" referred to a whale boat being dragged along by the enormous power of a harpooned whale. Today the Space Shuttle, riding atop its enormous expendable fuel tank, is dragged along at launch by the incredible power of its solid rocket boosters.

Finally, after all these years of waiting, a second whaling-themed N.A.S.A. project: Space harpoon-link.

This story also illustrates once again the principle that every noun is made more impressive & amusing when preceded by the adjective "space." Harpoon? Good. Space harpoon? Better. (See above.) Coyote? Good. Space coyote? Better. ("Take that, Space Coyote!") Pope? Good. Space Pope? Better. ("Is the Space Pope reptilian?" Crocodylus pontifex!)

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Barenaked Ladies, "Carol of the Bells" from Barenaked for the Holidays (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-14T08:41:00.000-05:00

Operation AXIOM
One hundred years ago to the day, 14 December 1911, Roald Amundsen & his Norwegian expedition because the first men to reach the South Pole. Many before & many since have perished trying to accomplish the same feat, but Amundsen's intelligence, preparation, & endurance allowed him to conquer the Antarctic & bring all his men home to tell the tale. Mankind's progress depends upon such a spirit of exploration, & it is right & proper that we should remember & honor Roald Amundsen's, et al., achievement. Reminder-link.

2011-12-13T20:17:00.005-05:00

Obamboozled
What was the harm in asking the Islamic Republic of Iran to return the United States drone that malfunctioned/was downed over Iran? The Iranians might say no, once again highlighting President Obama's impotence in international affairs. Bad news, Mr. President, the Iranians have once again highlighted your impotence in international affairs: No, thank you-link. Maybe the latter-day princes of Persia would be more agreeable, sir, if you actually kowtowed before an image of the Ayatollah Khomeini? As long as we are doing everything we can do to appear as weak as possible in the eyes of both our friends & enemies, it might be worth a try.

How's the parade of horrors been treating you, Obama '08 voters? Is this the change you believed in?

The Queue
There is one crucial plot hole in The Spy Who Came in From the Cold with which I was familiar from the excellent motion picture adaptation; I was mildly disappointed to find it in the novel as well. 'Tis one of those niggles that perhaps irks only persnickety beggars such as your humble narrator. "The plan" only works because of some unanticipated element that could not possibly have been anticipated, even by a nigh-omniscient planner, yet the author never bothers to offer a plausible explanation of how the plan could possibly have worked without that unanticipated element. The Spy Who Came in From the Cold is a grand yarn, but it is far more akin to Call for the Dead—le Carré's debut—than Tinker, Tailor, Solider, Spy—his masterpiece. I fear I've read his best, but find solace in the confidence that there is plenty of worth in much of the rest.

Recently
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story
Guillermo del Toro, Christopher Golden, & Troy Nixey, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold

Currently
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story

Presently
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Barenaked Ladies, "Footprints" from Barenaked for the Holidays (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"You look just outstanding in the snow,
Standing in the snow."

2011-12-13T07:58:00.003-05:00

There is an inverse relationship 'twixt when I intend to rise & when I fall asleep the previous night. Were I planning to wake up at eight this morning, I probably would have been able to fall asleep between midnight & one o'clock. Because I planned to wake up at seven this morning (& the plan worked), I could not embrace slumber 'til after two. Lovely, prosperous relationship, that.

2011-12-12T20:20:00.003-05:00

Autobahn
I shall never understand those of my fellow motorists who drive at a speed of thirty-five miles per hour on Hill Road, where the posted speed limit is forty-five miles per hour, & at a speed of thirty-five miles per hour on the tight, twisting streets of my subdivision, where the posted speed limit is twenty-five miles per hour. I don't find them just infuriating, but also utterly bewildering. I fail to comprehend what they could possibly be thinking. There are lots kids & old fogeys, no sidewalks, & precious little margin for error in the neighborhood, you menaces! There are acres of asphalt, delightfully few curves, & almost no pedestrians on Hill Road, you snails! Mayhap we should invest more public treasure into mass transit, so as to get more of those yahoos out from behind the wheel.

Obamboozled
In no way am I blaming President Obama for the loss of our stealth drone over Iran, but is he making an already humiliating situation better or worse by asking the loose-cannon fanatics who run the Islamic Republic to return the blasted thing? What's the harm in asking?-link. Is a highly classified surveillance drone like a Frisbee that has sailed over the fence into your curmudgeonly neighbor's backyard? Can you just ask for it back? Maybe if Mr. Obama would sweeten the pot by having Secretary Clinton send the Guardian Council a nice handwritten note that read, in part, "Pretty, pretty please, with sugar on top?"

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
The Klezmonauts, "Good King Wenceslas" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-11T14:35:00.005-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXV - The hard-fighting, hard-drinking life & times of John Manners, Marquess of Granby (1721-1770).

Operation AXIOM
A year ago to the day, 11 December 2010 (stylized as 12.11.10), your humble narrator was in Ann Arbor for The Big Chill at the Big House, & thus became, for the second time in his life, part of the largest crowd ever to attend an ice hockey game. The Big Chill was a spectacle, combining the largest-ever crowd with fireworks, a flyover by a B-2 stealth bomber, & an immensely enjoyable victory, Michigan 5-0 Michigan State. 'Twas one of the ages, a gay old time I shan't ever forget.

Go Blue!

The Victors: Project OSPREY
Saturday, 10 December
(№ 20) Michigan 90-80 Oakland
7-2, Big Ten 0-0

The display the valiant Wolverines put on against the epithetless Golden Grizzlies was distressing. Yes, the Maize & Blue prevailed, but I wouldn't be at all surprised to see Michigan drop out of the Top 25 after such a sorry spectacle. In the first half, the valiant Wolverines built up a fourteen-point lead, only to let it slip through their fingers thanks to double-digit turnovers; an Oakland three-pointer just before the buzzer meant the teams went into halftime tied, 32-32. In the second half, the valiant Wolverines built up a fifteen-point lead, only to see the epithetless Golden Grizzlies pare it down to six before the fouls & free throws of the last minute stabilized Michigan's edge at ten points. Being able to prevail over a competent, if unspectacular opponent even when putting in a subpar performance is encouraging, I suppose, but the discouraging part of yesterday's contest was the Jekyll & Hyde nature of the valiant Wolverines' play. Consistency, lads, consistency! We must achieve a superior degree of consistency!

But I suppose I should be less harsh in my critiques. After all, these are young men & the season itself is yet young. Plenty of time to correct bad habits & techniques. A win is a win, & I should be grateful for the win. I am grateful for the win. Congratulations, you valiant Wolverines! Keep up the good work.

Go Blue!

Urbi et Orbi
There weren't any babies located near my mother & me at Mass today. Of late, it has seemed as if Holy Redeemer is lousy with babies, & they are a delightful addition to the proceedings, even moreso since I've been an uncle. We have a crying room, but unless the wee bairn cries incessantly I hold that they should be in the nave with the rest of the parish; a little fussing reaffirms the vitality of the parish, the future of the Church. I mug at babies whenever we make eye contact, sticking my tongue out at them & making silly faces. Sometimes they stare blankly, sometimes they smile brightly, sometimes they look away in minor panic. I love making faces at babies & shall not stop unless & until His Holiness the Pope commands me to stop.

I am on track to attend Mass between thirty-six & thirty-nine times this year, well short of the goal of fifty-two Masses I set myself every New Year, but better than I've done since record-keeping began in 2008: '08, thirty-two; '09, thirty-three; '10, thirty-two. I could still technically make fifty-two if I arose early every day to attend morning Mass, but 'twould be abominable to do so, since I'd be attending Mass for my own aggrandizement, not in worshipful deference to the Lord Almighty. My immortal soul is imperiled enough without that additional sin of pride.

A Thousand Words
The photograph below is apropos of nothing beyond the magnificence of the photograph itself. No tree-hugger am I, but I've no particular objection to wind power, as long as it is economically competitive with other sources. (I am an ardent fan of solar power because I love the idea of using the Accursed Sun's own energy to defeat its twin death rays of heat & nuclear radiation, but that's neither here nor there.) The photograph in question:

The Queue
I didn't expect much from a book co-authored by Guillermo del Toro, & he lived down to expectations. Still, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Recently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story
Guillermo del Toro, Christopher Golden, & Troy Nixey, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies

Currently
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold

Presently
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Songs of the Day
Sufjan Stevens, "The Friendly Beasts" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis the third Sunday of Advent, Gaudete Sunday. Rejoice!

"Jesus, our brother, strong and good,
Was humbly born in a stable rude,
And the friendly beasts around him stood,
Jesus, our brother, strong and good."

Samstag, 10 Dezember
The Puppini Sisters, "Mele Kalikimaka" from Christmas with The Puppini Sisters (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Chosen in honor of Forgetting Sarah Marshall, which I saw last night for the first time since the cinema. 'Tis such a deftly-crafted film.

"Mele kalikimake is Hawaii's way
To say, 'Merry Christmas!' to you."

2011-12-09T17:20:00.005-05:00

Happy Birthday!
Happiest of birthday wishes to my sister, The L.A.W. My sister is a riddle wrapped in a mystery hidden deep within an enigma guarded by a steep cliff & a jaguar, & has always been viewed the least emotional person I know. That said, she had crazy bride eyes on her wedding day, & is as ridiculous & silly around her daughter, my niece, as any mother is around an adorable almost two-year-old girl. Which makes the riddle, the mystery, & the enigma of The L.A.W. all the more impenetrable. Happy birthday, Lisa!

Project PARAFFIN
The code name for my first attempt at penning a novel has been selected. Project PARAFFIN commences on New Year's Day. ("MOAB" is thanked for its participation & will be filed away for some future use.) I fully expect to loathe the word "paraffin" by New Year's Eve 2012, but this change of tack has to happen sometime, & the sooner the better since 'tis already years overdue. Prepare thyself for PARAFFIN.

Grow or die.

But first, I must finish the current tier of Project PALINDROME. No skipping ahead, jerk!

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Dance Hall Crashers, "North Pole" from The Old Record (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-08T21:20:00.003-05:00

Flip through to the last photograph in the sequence for a delightfully curious case of the wind & the windmill (from the first photo, click on the left arrow): Scotia-link.

Code Name: CHAOS
What shall I code name my first attempt at authoring a novel, Project MOAB or Project PARAFFIN? Project PARAFFIN or Project MOAB? I'm leaning toward PARAFFIN, but MOAB still appeals, too.

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Sufjan Stevens, "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing!" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Yes, I know titular angels are heralding the birth o' the Christ, not the immaculate conception of the Virgin, but since her sinless birth was one of many signs heralding the advent o' the Christ, I thought "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing!" apropos enough for the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Back to heathen secular Christmas music upon the morrow.

2011-12-07T20:13:00.017-05:00

The Victors: Project OSPREY
Saturday, 3 December
(№ 14) Michigan 76-66 Iowa State
6-2, Big Ten 0-0

Project OSPREY '11-'12 got off to a bad start when I missed the valiant Wolverines' season opener against the Ferris State Bulldogs out of sheer forgetfulness. Between the disruption of being in the hateful Canadas the weekend before Thanksgiving & then the run-up to the holiday itself, I also missed the Maui Invitational, which saw the valiant Wolverines defeat the Memphis Tigers (73-61) & U.C.L.A. Bruins (79-63) & fall to the Duke Blue Devils (82-75). I missed the A.C.C./Big Ten Challenge, which saw the valiant Wolverines fall to the Virginia Cavaliers (70-58), because I always miss the A.C.C./Big Ten Challenge. I finally got into the swing of things with the game against Iowa State, after which the valiant Wolverines would not play again for a solid week. I've no one but myself to blame for not taking proper advantage of the earlier opportunities.

I was well-pleased with the discipline—both offensive & defensive—with which the valiant Wolverines built a twenty-two point lead in the second half against the epithetless Cyclones, but then shook a proverbial fist at the sky in frustration when lax defense & countless turnovers saw that lead shrink to as few as six. I must remind myself that overall the valiant Wolverines are a fairly young team, & that experience (some of it bitter) will teach them the importance of playing hard for all forty minutes. All in all, good show, lads!

'11-'12 was going to be a massive year for the valiant Wolverines, 'til Darius Morris, the guard who anchored & coordinated the entire offense, left Ann Arbor to try his luck & make his fortune as a professional. As things stand post-Morris, the valiant Wolverines should still be a solid, sometimes spectacular team, lead by senior & three-time captain Zack Novak, he of "aneurysm of leadership" fame who was aptly described by one of the television commentators as the very definition of "scrappy," & sophomore Tim Hardaway, Jr., the Maize & Blue's leading scorer. Michigan has fallen to № 20 in the polls, after a 1-1 week. Early days yet, but all the elements are in place for the valiant Wolverines to enjoy great success, though there is always more work to be done to sure up the defense. I do so love life in the John Beilein era.

Go Blue!

The Victors
As excited as I am about the valiant Wolverines' berth in the Sugar Bowl, I am not going to hop on the "Geaux Blue!" bandwagon. Yes, the Sugar Bowl is in New Orleans & in French the letters "eaux" can make the same sound as "o" does in English. Yes, I get it. Getting it doesn't make it any less lame. (Because my hypocrisy knows no bounds, I do still want to name a cat Phydeaux, pronounced "Fido.")

Go Blue!

Project GLOWWORM
I trimmed my beard on Friday last, noted in my calendar by a single word, "bonsai," getting fully back on schedule for the first time in months. I stuck to the schedule even though a faction of my mind argued that my beard wasn't long enough to necessitate trimming, & I stuck to the prescribed length (level nine) instead of the shorter, reactionary length that I always regret (level seven). The bonsai regimen was established after careful consideration & experimentation, yet more often than not I deviate in some element. Methinks this is because trimming my beard is essentially less satisfying than cutting my hair, leaving room for some misguided faction of my mind to militate for some harebrained, on-the-fly modification. The system works, Mike, stick to the system.

In other personal grooming news, I began last week to shave my cheeks thrice a week instead of twice a week & it has made a world of difference. The sparse hairs on my cheeks, the sparseness of which is why I have to bother to shave my cheeks in the first place, are the enemies of the flying handlebars of my moustache. By shaving them more often, they seem to be growing back more slowly than before. I've no theory as to why that might be, but am more than satisfied with the results. I've also begun to use a dab of Kiehl's after each shaving, & am now entirely befuddled as to why I have not been doing so all along. Such foolishness! Life with whiskers is a continual process of discovery.

Vote for Kodos
I've formulated a wild theory that is plainly ridiculous, but for which the logic is too solid to dismiss easily. Here goes: Newt Gingrich is either a plant or a dupe, in either event an agent of the Democratic party. Speaker Gingrich was instrumental in getting President Clinton reelected in 1996; between leading the newly-minted Republican Congressional majorities into legislative overreach & being so easily & effectively caricatured into a heartless bogeyman, Gingrich was the perfect foil for "Slick Willy." That alone reveals nothing, certainly nothing of a conspiratorial bent, but consider recent events. Gingrich has tapped into the "anybody but Romney" madness that afflicts too many respondents to opinion polls of likely Republican voters, leading the polls in Iowa, a seemingly medieval place. The Democrats are salivating for the chance to run against Gingrich because the man is an undisciplined blowhard, a smug, infantile, corrupt megalomaniac; former Speaker Gingrich has about as much chance of winning a national general election as does Representative Paul with his soft anarchism. If Gingrich can manage to keep his lunacy under wraps for another few weeks, he might be able to edge out Governor Romney & make a dash for the Republican presidential nomination, all but guaranteeing President Obama's re-election.

So what do we have? We have Newt Gingrich being instrumental to the re-election of President Clinton in 1996 & we have Newt Gingrich doing his damnedest to re-elect President Obama in 2012. But that's just two incidents, & the immortal words of Ian Fleming demonstrate that we need three to be sure: "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."* What's the third time, the missing piece of the puzzle that condemns the Gingrinch? The answer: 2008. Why didn't Newt Gingrich run for president in 2008? Speaker Gingrich could not have been a viable candidate for president in 2000 because he has too recently resigned from the House of Representatives in disgrace; he could not run in 2004 because there was a sitting Republican president seeking re-election. But what exactly stopped Gingrich from running in 2008? What was different between 2008 & 2012? In 2008, the economy, both domestic & global, was rapidly heading into recessional gloom; in 2012, the economy, both domestic & global, will still be mired in barely post-recessional gloom. In 2008, the Islamic Republic of Iran was pursuing the atomic bomb; in 2012, the Islamic Republic of Iran will be even closer to acquiring the atomic bomb. In 2008, Gingrich was a twice-divorced sleazebag who had been sanctioned by the House of Representatives for ethics violations; in 2012, Gingrich will still be a twice-divorced sleazebag who has been sanctioned by the House of Representatives for ethics violations. The only meaningful difference is that in 2008 there was no sitting Democratic president for a Gingrich campaign to aid.

"Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action."

I freely admit that this theory, to which even its author fails to subscribe, is beyond outlandish, more than fanciful. I have a fertile imagination, but I do not believe in conspiracy theories, because the real world is too messy a place for the neat stratagems of the silver screen's sinister masterminds not to be unraveled, exposed, & undermined. It would be an act of unimaginably, unfeasibly sophisticated plotting for the whole weird arc of Gingrich's career to have been in service of the very principals against which he was railed & legislated; Gingrich cannot be a plant. Yet the individual pieces still stand. Clinton could not have been re-elected without Gingrich. Obama's best chance of re-election is Gingrich. Where was Gingrich in '08? Gingrich might well be a Democratic dupe, an accidental Manchurian candidate. Please tell me that somebody out there can poke holes in this ridiculous piece of farcical supposition.

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Mu330, "Everyday Christmas" from Winter Wonderland! (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: It's beginning to look a lot like an Mu330 New Year.

*As a side note, I will never forgive Fleming for writing "the third time" instead of "thrice."

2011-12-07T07:55:00.000-05:00

Operation AXIOM
Seventy years ago to the day, 7 December 1941, "the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan." The Day of Infamy must never be forgotten, lest we dishonor the memory of those Americans who perished in the sneak attack. Also, lest we forget the naivete that so long dominated America's view of the world beyond our shores, a naivete that fueled our historical isolationism, a naivete that was already a luxury we could not afford on 6 December 1941, but which a variety of accidents of history had left intact. In the present climate of an hysterical isolationist revival, on both the Right & the Left, we dare not forget the harsh lesson of the Day of Infamy. We dare not withdraw back into ourselves, succor ourselves with the lie that the rest of the world is no concern of ours. To do so would be to wreak our own destruction in the 21st century, & to make in vain the sacrifices of those who gave the last full measure of devotion in the 20th century. Lest we forget the Day of Infamy.

Wow, the Time cover is already twenty years old. Tempus fugate.

2011-12-06T19:07:00.009-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXIV - Joshua A. Norton (circa 1818-1880), a.k.a. Emperor Norton I, Emperor of these United States & Protector of Mexico.

The Queue
No, I haven't already finished The Spy Who Came in From the Cold, but I have decided to read at least You Suck & after that quite possibly Bite Me. Vampires are GO!… apparently. There would still be a question mark after City of Gold, except that we don't stretch "Presently" that far into the ever-changing future.

Recently
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story

Currently
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
Guillermo del Toro, Christopher Golden, & Troy Nixey, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies (W.C. reading)

Presently
Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story
Christopher Moore, Bite Me: A Love Story
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
Sufjan Stevens, "It's Christmas! Let's Be Glad!" from Songs for Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-05T20:57:00.005-05:00

Autobahn
Best. Pile-up. Ever. Crash & the Boys-link.

The Queue
There was much to like & just as much to dislike about Bloodsucking Fiends, in such equal proportions that I am undecided if I shall read either of the sequels, You Suck & Bite Me. Laughs aplenty, but I do so loathe moral relativism.

Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies was a gift from Ki-El, swag from his career as a journalist covering the nexus between the comic book & the motion picture industries, a token of his regret for having so long in his possession two of the my D.V.D. boxsets of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine; I assured him no such apology was necessary, but he insisted & I am grateful for the gift.

Recently
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends: A Love Story

Currently
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
Guillermo del Toro, Christopher Golden, & Troy Nixey, Don't Be Afraid of the Dark: Blackwood's Guide to Dangerous Fairies (W.C. reading)

Presently
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold
?

The Rebel Black Dot Christmas Song of the Day
The Klezmonauts, "Santa Gey Gezunderheit" from Oy to the World: A Klezmer Christmas (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"I used to think that it was tough
To get the spring line out,
But here's a guy who really knows
What hard work's all about.
Billions of deliveries
With no option to be late,
That's a lot of schlepping,
Santa gey gezunderheit!
Oh, all year long you're shvitzing,
Making countless wooden toys,
Paint 'em! Wrap 'em! Load 'em up!
For all the girls and boys,
And Mrs. Claus is hocking (sp?)
That you stay up far too late,
And those elves make such a racket,
Santa gey gezunderheit!
…
Santa gey gezunderheit! Santa gey gezunderheit!
Gotta work the territory, God forbid you should be late!"

2011-12-04T20:04:00.016-05:00

The Explorers Club | Operation AXIOM
Series are an important part of "The Explorers Club," but a tool on which yours truly became overly dependent over the last year. On the one hand, series allow for the exploration of several interconnected or closely related subjects, adding to a fuller understanding of each. On the other hand, series tend to have an almost parochial focus on two subjects near & dear to mine own heart, Greek myth & espionage. Is it in the spirit of exploration never to venture beyond the same subjects? On the gripping hand, variety is the spice of life, & the natural bent of your humble narrator's magpie mind. Regarding series, moderation shall be our watchword going forward, in the mold of Goldilocks: not too may, not too few, but just right.

Our longest-running series to date comprises five episodes spread over two years, highlighting various aspects of what I regard as possibly the crowning glory of Man's ingenuity, Project Apollo & the landing of men on the Moon. I stand behind the proposition that there is no such thing as too much Project Apollo & I would not be surprised should the future hold a sixth part to the series. Apollo! Apollo! Apollo! (Not the Olympian god, in whom I have no interest, despite my general fascination with Greek myth.)

Project PALINDROME
'Tis going to be a December to remember as K. Steeze & I race to wrap up this non-enumerated tier of Project PALINDROME, a project that I suspect is going to undergo significant change based on Steeze's irrepressible energy & entrepreneurship. Of course, as far behind on my work as I am, by the end of this December to remember I'm going to want to forget the whole tortuous (yes, I mean tortuous, not torturous) month. Let the recriminations begin! All the work I have to do in such little time? It's all because Past Mike, when he was Present Mike, didn't feel like writing & said it would be Future Mike's problem. Future Mike has now become Present Mike & he simply cannot pass the buck onto some later-yet Future Mike, not without running the grave risk of the work never being completed. If Present Mike/former Future Mike knew how to get his hands on Past Mike, he's wring Past Mike's fat neck. Curse your sloth, Past Mike! Okay, that's enough of that, because recriminations, as dreadfully fun as they are, aren't going to bring PALINDROME any closer to (tier-bound) completion. Onward!

Grow or die.

Project "THUNDERBALL"*
Aside from the importance to PALINDROME's advancement of finishing my assigned PALINDROME work by New Year's Eve, the paramount reason for this final push is a new challenge that I am going to take up on New Year's Day: Between 1 January & 31 December Anno Domini 2012, I am going to complete the first draft of my first novel. I have never undertaken an endeavour of this magnitude before, but know that it is necessary if I am ever to be anything more than an aspiring writer. 2009, the year of Tier 1 of Project TROIKA, was a time of great creative flowering, as for once my scattershot mind was compelled to focus on one project, to discipline itself; during the two years that The Ace has been laboring on Tiers 2 & 3 of TROIKA I have backslid into my old, unproductive habits of dabbling with this, dabbling with that, & never getting any real work done. K. Steeze did me a good turn by requesting my help with Project PALINDROME, & I have been honored to work on a something that has been so close to his heart for so long, but the fruits of PALINDROME are undeniably Steeze's own; I aided him, but past & present he's done the lion's share of the work & the project is his. If I am to hone my skills as a writer, I need to write more than just treatments & "Bibles," but something that is itself meant for publication. I am not so arrogant as to think I have any conception of how hard this is going to be, though paradoxically I feel certain this endeavour is going to be more torturous (yes, I meant torturous, not tortuous) than anything else I've attempted. I've failed in life to this point because I've attempted next to nothing; the only way to change my stars is to attempt something unprecedented. I might yet fail, but, by Jove, this time it will not be for want of trying!

The sage words of President Theodore Roosevelt:

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

'Tis time to be the man who is actually in the arena.

Because next year's exertions are meant to result in (the first draft of) a novel I can (at least attempt to) sell to a publisher, I am unwilling to post in as public a forum as The Secret Base as many details as I'd like to share with you, loyal readers. The secrecy of Projects TROIKA & PALINDROME will be my guide vis-à-vis this blog, though in (relative) private I'll answer all questions, I'll tell you all you wish to know, or at least as much as I've dreamed up at any given moment.

These are far from our last words on the subject.

Grow or die.

He's Dead, Jim
The swelling under my right eye has receded & I've still no explanation for its occurrence in the first place. C'est la vie, I'm just glad to be back to nominal.

*This new project is NOT going to be code named THUNDERBALL. THUNDERBALL is the placeholder name Steeze & I use when we've devised but not yet named a character. Rather, THUNDERBALL is what we call the rôle that character will play in the story, since from my perspective as something with a minor degree of logophilia a character isn't really a character without a name. I adore the works of the Bard of Avon, but must disagree that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. This is to be a "Project," not an "Operation" nor an "Objective"… though now that I think about it the tiers of this project might later be broken down into individual objectives. Leading candidates include Project ANTIPODE, Project OMDURMAN, & Project BALDERDASH, those these are not finalists & the field is still wide-open to other ideas. Any suggestions for code names, dear readers?

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
The Civil Wars, "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel" via iTunes, Free Single of the Week (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: 'Tis the second Sunday of Advent. Rejoice! Make ready! The King of Kings draws near!

Also, welcome to the first day of Christmas-themed R.B.D.S.O.T.D., secular music 'til Christmas Eve, excluding Sundays & the looming Feast of the Immaculate Conception, & sacred music (or at least sacred-ish) throughout the Christmastide.

Samstag, 3 Dezember
Irish Tradition, "Loftus Jones" from Green Linnet Records: The Twentieth Anniversary Collection (T.L.A.M.)

2011-12-02T23:08:00.004-05:00

He's Dead, Jim
The lower eyelid beneath my right eye & the bag under the eye are swollen. I first noticed the slight compromise to my vision on Wednesday, but didn't spy the swelling in a mirror 'til yesterday. I am baffled as to the cause. I do not recall smacking my face into anything & can say with certainty that I was not struck in a bout of fisticuffs with another gent. I don't recall being bit by an insect or spider, nor do I see any bite sight withing the swollen area. Mayhap the reaction is to exposure to a chemical irritant? Again, I am clueless as to when this might have occurred. The swelling is slightly less today than it was yesterday, but is not decreasing as swiftly as I'd prefer. What the heck?

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Muppets & Joanna Newsom, "The Muppet Show Theme" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Three guesses as to what motion picture I saw at the cinema this evening.

2011-12-01T18:13:00.003-05:00

The Explorers Club | Operation AXIOM
My treasured readers doesn't care about the fifth anniversary of "The Explorers Club." This grieved me at first, until I recalled who I am, & for what I stand. I am The Last Angry Man. It is my supreme joy & privilege to be a Blue Tree Whacker, I stand by our ancient motto, our credo, "Alienate the audience." Of course! Alienate the audience! If "The Explorers Club" is what they don't want, then it is "The Explorers Club" I'm going to give them. (Also, agonizingly long, painfully detailed "This Week in Motorsport" posts. Yeah!) The audience doesn't care about the fifth anniversary of "The Explorers Club," which in an odd way validates the projects, which began with the caustic words, "And now for the insults: you lot are terribly ignorant." But ignorance is not that great an insult; ignorance is easily enough overcome, which means it really is no insult at all. No, the far worse condemnation of you lot is not that you are ignorant, but that you are incurious. You've no wish to know anything about the world beyond your own parochial interests, your own petty concerns. Fie, I say! Fie on that! Fie on you! Quixotic though it might/must be, "The Explorers Club" shall not give up its quest to broaden your horizons, to open the eyes of you troglodytes to the boundless vistas beyond your own intellectual shores. We continue, out of spite if for no nobler reason. Spite!

Project PALINDROME
Crunch time. All first drafts are due by the New Year. No exceptions, no excuses, no extensions. I need to put my head down & power through this last bit of the work, for on 1 January I begin a new project, an entirely new challenge about which I shan't say more until I've devised a code name & am ready to give full details. (Expect this within days at most.) Time to spend December in the PALINDROME.

Grow or die.

The Queue
A Princess of Mars is an incredibly short, page-turning read. I cannot wait to read more of Burroughs. Should I next sample his most famous & enduring work, Tarzan of the Apes, of which I own a copy, or continue with the Barsoom stories? That is the kind of conundrum with which I am only too happy to wrestle. First, vampires; then, more spies.

Recently
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars

Currently
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends

Presently
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Heidi Swedberg and the Sukey Jump Band, "Dream a Little Dream" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Heidi Swedberg is also an actress, best known for playing Susan Ross, George Costanza's ill-fated fiancée, on the glory that was Seinfeld. For my money, Susan's storyline was quite possibly Seinfeld's funniest.

2011-11-30T20:37:00.006-05:00

The Explorers Club | Operation AXIOM
More celebrations were planned, but they've been cancelled due to a complete lack of audience interest. Someone remind me to board up The Secret Base before burning it to the ground for the insurance money.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Knickerbocker Four, "In My Merry Oldsmobile" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

2011-11-29T19:28:00.000-05:00

My thought, quite naturally I should think, upon reading the words, "What Your Favorite Map Projection Says About You," was to query my Registry as to my favorite map projection. The answer came back, Globe. Supplementary query: Is a globe really a map projection, or are those limited to two-dimensional representations? On this the Registry was silent, though I thought I could actually hear their eyes rolling. Only then did I read on & scroll down: niner-seven-seven-link.

The Queue
There has been movement on neither Bloodsucking Fiends nor The Spy Who Came in From the Cold; the G.D.L. is normally a tighter ship than this. So, a brief tangent away from both the espionage & vampire genres, to the corner of fantasy & sci-fi (distinct from science fiction [S.F.]).

Recently
John Marks, Fangland
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence
John le Carré, Call for the Dead

Currently
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars

Presently
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Senator & The New Republic, "Intermission" via iTunes, Free Single of the Week (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-28T13:56:00.008-05:00

He's Dead, Jim
Yesterday, I applied Neutrogena Norwegian Formula hand cream for the first time this season, in response to a rather sudden chapping & cracking of the skin across my knuckles. I propose to establish a regular schedule of Norwegian Formula moisturizing, to transform what has always been a potent curative into a potent preventative. My skin didn't dry out like this until my mid-twenties, surely a sign of aging. I've lost the flower of youth, but that doesn't mean I've lost of love of winter & the bitter, accompanying cold.

Science!
There's good news & there's bad news regarding the launching of robotic probes to the Red Planet. The good news first. After many delays, the massive Curiosity rover has been launched along with the rest of the Mars Science Laboratory mission: Red Planet-link. Hooray! Here's a closer look at the M.S.L.: Mission to Mars-link. Curiosity is a beast, massively larger than the gallant duo of Mars Exploration Rovers, Spirit (R.I.P.) & Opportunity, which began their explorations of Mars in '04, & which were themselves massively larger than N.A.S.A.'s original Mars rover, the wee Sojourner that landed with the Mars Pathfinder mission way back in '97.

The bad news is that the latest Russian Mars probe remains stuck in Earth orbit & chances that it will be able to complete its planned voyage to the Martian moon of Phobos are slim: Ghosts of Mars-link. N.A.S.A. has suffered a goodly number of Mars mission failures, but the Russians' record is truly deplorable. The silver lining to those dark clouds is that the almost-certain failure does not mean that our manned spaceflight "partners" (we are beholden to the Russians to ferry our astronauts to & from the International Space Station, thanks to President Obama's abandonment of American manned spaceflight) are not yet ready to give up on their plans for more robotic probes to plumb the mysteries of the Solar System: Aelita: Queen of Mars-link.

The key to spaceflight, both manned & robotic? Persistence, the refusal to be deterred by repeated failure. The Red Planet is a prize precisely because the voyage across the heavens is so perilous. Go forth, faithful robot minions, & make your human masters proud! We shall follow you in due time.

The Queue
Call for the Dead read like le Carré, but clearly preliminary le Carré. The book is brief, the plot straightforward & the characters few in number compared to his later works. I've decided to skip le Carré's second novel, A Murder of Quality, & move on to this third—& first bestseller—The Spy Who Came in From the Cold.

A Princess of Mars might jump the queue if necessary to be read before the release of the motion picture John Carter (which really should be titled John Carter of Mars).

Recently
John Marks, Fangland
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence
John le Carré, Call for the Dead

Currently
(waiting for the library to get its act together)

Presently
Christopher Moore, Bloodsucking Fiends
John le Carré, The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Cars, "Just What I Needed" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-27T19:01:00.076-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXIII - Ivrea's annual Battle of the Oranges.

The Explorers Club | Operation AXIOM
Five years ago to the day, 27 November 2006, a new feature was added to The Secret Base, an educational series fancifully titled "The Explorers Club." Each of the hyperlinks below works, allowing any interested Club member (for our purposes, anyone reading these lines is a member of the Explorers Club) to peruse the five years of "Explorers Club" episodes without plumbing through The Secret Base's archives. I wish I'd been able to take more time to explore The Secret Base of years gone by, but with over two hundred sixty hyperlinks to construct & enable, there was precious little time for sightseeing. I hope you enjoy our retrospective, & more importantly that your appetite to learn is continually whetted by "The Explorers Club."

№ I - The Fairey Rotodyne.

№ II / № III / № IV / № V / № VI

№ VII / № VIII / № IX / № X / № XI

№ XII / № XIII / № XIV / № XV / № XVI

№ XVII / № XVIII / № XIX / № XX / № XXI

№ XXII / № XXIII / № XXIV / № XXV / № XXVI

№ XXVII / № XXVIII / № XXIX / № XXX / № XXXI

№ XXXII / № XXXIII / № XXXIV / № XXXV / № XXXVI

№ XXXVII / № XXXVIII / № XXXIX / № XL / № XLI

№ XLII / № XLIII / № XLIV / № XLV / № XLVI

№ XLVII / № XLVIII / № XLIX

№ L - The last will & testament of Cecil Rhodes.

№ LI / № LII / № LIII / № LIV / № LV

№ LVI / № LVII / № LVIII / № LIX / № LX

№ LXI / № LXII / № LXIII / № LXIV / № LXV

№ LXVI / № LXVII / № LXVIII / № LXIX / № LXX

№ LXXI / № LXXII / № LXXIII / № LXXIV / № LXXV

№ LXXVI / № LXXVII / № LXXVIII / № LXXIX / № LXXX

№ LXXXI / № LXXXII / № LXXXIII / № LXXXIV / № LXXXV

№ LXXXVI / № LXXXVII / № LXXXVIII / № LXXXIX / № XC

№ XCI / № XCII / № XCIII / № XCIV / № XCV

№ XCVI / № XCVII / № XCVIII / № XCIX

№ C - William Wilberforce (1759-1833).

№ CI / № CII / № CIII / № CIV / № CV

№ CVI / № CVII / № CVIII / № CIX / № CX

№ CXI / № CXII / № CXIII / № CXIV / № CXV

№ CXVI / № CXVII / № CXVIII / № CXIX / № CXX

№ CXXI / № CXXII / № CXXIII / № CXXIV / № CXXV

№ CXXVI / № CXXVII / № CXXVIII / № CXXIX

№ CXXX - The Falkirk Wheel.
The most popular episode of "The Explorers Club," bar none.

№ CXXXI / № CXXXII / № CXXXIII / № CXXXIV / № CXXXV

№ CXXXVI / № CXXXVII / № CXXXVIII / № CXXXIX / № CXL

№ CXLI / № CXLII / № CXLIII / № CXLIV / № CXLV

№ CXLVI / № CXLVII / № CXLVIII / № CXLIX

№ CL - The H-4 Hercules, a.k.a. the "Spruce Goose."

№ CLI / № CLII / № CLIII / № CLIV / № CLV

№ CLVI / № CLVII / № CLVIII / …

Unforgivable months of silence.

… / № CLIX / № CLX

№ CLXI / № CLXII / № CLXIII / № CLXIV / № CLXV

№ CLXVI / № CLXVII / № CLXVIII / № CLXIX / № CLXX

№ CLXXI / № CLXXII / № CLXXIII / № CLXXIV

№ CLXXV - The Shadow.
A birthday present from the author to himself.

№ CLXXVI / № CLXXVII / № CLXXVIII / № CLXXIX / № CLXXX

№ CLXXXI / № CLXXXII / № CLXXXIII / № CLXXXIV / № CLXXXV

№ CLXXXVI / № CLXXXVII / № CLXXXVIII / № CLXXXIX / № CXC

№ CXCI / № CXCII / № CXCIII / № CXCIV / № CXCV

№ CXCVI / № CXCVII / № CXCVIII / № CXCIX

№ CC - Neanderthal Man.

№ CCI / № CCII / № CCIII / № CCIV / № CCV

№ CCVI / № CCVII / № CCVIII / № CCIX / № CCX

№ CCXI / № CCXII / № CCXIII / № CCXIV / № CCXV

№ CCXVI / № CCXVII / № CCXVIII / № CCXIX / № CCXX

№ CCXXI / № CCXXII / № CCXXIII / № CCXXIV / № CCXXV

№ CCXXVI / № CCXXVII / № CCXXVIII / № CCXXIX / № CCXXX

№ CCXXXI / № CCXXXII / № CCXXXIII / № CCXXXIV / № CCXXXV

№ CCXXXVI / № CCXXXVII / № CCXXXVIII / № CCXXXIX / № CCXL

№ CCXLI / № CCXLII / № CCXLIII / № CCXLIV / № CCXLV

№ CCXLVI / № CCXLVII / № CCXLVIII / № CCXLIX

№ CCL - Giorgio Perlasca (1910-1992).

№ CCLI / № CCLII / № CCLIII / № CCLIV / № CCLV

№ CCLVI / № CCLVII / № CCLVIII / № CCLIX / № CCLX

№ CCLXI / № CCLXII

№ CCLXIII - Ivrea's annual Battle of the Oranges.

Whew! That took forever. Someone remind me never to do this again; or, rather, to find a more efficient way to commemorate future anniversaries of "The Explorers Club."

Urbi et Orbi
'Tis the first Sunday of Advent. The Nativity draws near. Soon all of Christendom celebrates the birth of the Christ. Rejoice! Make ready! The Christmastide approaches, the season not for consumerism & neo-pagan malarky about the Winter Solstice but for joyous reflection upon the Incarnation. Advent, adventus, "coming." The Christ is coming, all the almighty power of God & all the frailty of a man in a single being, a babe as given to drooling & burping as any other. Rejoice! The anniversary of something truly wonderful draws near.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
William Shatner, "Has Been" from Has Been (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I'm not sure if I should divide the "spoken word" bits of "Has Been" into lines & stanzas like proper lyrics, but I've chosen to do so for clarity's sake.

"I've heard of you, the ready-made connecting with the ever-ready,
Yeah, 'Never was' talking about 'Still trying,'
I got it, 'Forever bitter' gossiping about 'Never say die.'
…
What are you afraid of, failure? So am I.
…
'Has been' implies failure. Not so.
'Has been's' history. 'Has been" was.
'Has been'… might again."

2011-11-26T20:05:00.005-05:00

The Victors
(№ 17) Michigan 40-34 Ohio State
10-2, Big Ten 6-2

I was an emotional wreck throughout, careening 'twixt exultation & desolation during the second half after doing a reasonably good job of keeping myself in check for much of the first. I am an unsociable brute during big games, swearing like a sailor & raving like a madman. The ice-thin veneer of my reserve was cracked by my mother's infuriating, plaintive cries of "Oh, no" whenever anything would go the way of the hated Buckeyes. I love her dearly, but in my fragile state her attempt at partisanship was a provocation I could resist for only so long; having no wish to hurl invective at the poor woman, I decamped from the family room, where I'd been watching alongside her & my father, to the splendid isolation of the living room. I lived & died with the valiant Wolverines' rising & falling fortunes, 'til at last a savage bellow of triumph escaped my lips when the hated Buckeyes' last chance ended in an interception. Victory!

Rightly or wrongly, today's game has exorcized many of the ghosts that have haunted the Maize & Blue soul since the death of our great hero, Coach Glenn "Bo" Schembechler, on the eve of the '06 game. The '11 valiant Wolverines are probably the worst ten-win Michigan team I've seen, but they are a ten-win team all the same; let's us not allow the better to be the enemy of the good. The true mark of the champion is not whether they win pretty or win ugly, but that they win, that they carry the day whatever the circumstances. The valiant Wolverines are not yet champions, but of them Schbechler's immortal words can rightly be uttered, "Those who stay will be champions."

There is surely more to say, but for the nonce let this suffice: Go Blue!

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
The University of Michigan Marching Band, "Temptation" from Hurrah for the Yellow and Blue (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "You can't have one without the other. Ladies & gentlemen, the 'Hawaiian War Chant.'"

The University of Michigan Marching Band, "Hawaiian War Chant" from Hurrah for the Yellow and Blue (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-25T10:40:00.003-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, "Cowboy Coffee" (live) from Live from the Middle East (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I intended to choose the album version from More Noise and Other Distrubances, but it found itself outclassed by the live version, per usual. Live from the Middle East is an exceptional live album, the gold standard of my collection.

For reasons to be discussed later, my sense is that today the best thing to do is celebrate life.

2011-11-24T10:02:00.001-05:00

Operation AXIOM
Happy Thanksgiving, beloved readers! I hope that this Thanksgiving finds you in the warm embrace of kith and/or kin, hail & hearty, safe & sound, with naught to do all day but bask in the traditions old & new: the Macy's Day parade, the Detroit Lions' professional football game, slaving away for umpteen hours to prepare a meal that your kith & kin will devour with all the delicacy of laughing hyenas on a putrid wildebeest carcass. We are all so profoundly blessed, yet so many of us, your humble narrator foremost, are so often so willfully blind to just how fortunate we are. How right & proper that as a culture we should set aside one day of the year simply to give thanks for all that we have. Give thanks to the Creator. Give thanks to one another. Give thanks to our forefathers, who tamed this wild continent & secured for us the blessings of liberty. Give thanks to the turkeys who gave their lives for our nourishment & enjoyment. Give thanks to the invisible hand. Happy Thanksgiving!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Thanksgiving Day
Mike Park, "Thankful All the Same" from For the Love of Music (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-23T23:20:00.013-05:00

The Victors
I wasn't able to see either game, the victory over the feisty Fighting Illini due to a History Club trip to the Henry Ford Museum—the scheduling of which for a Saturday in the fall I argued against vigorously & viciously—& the victory over the unwelcome Cornhuskers due to a debate tournament in the Canadas (to be chronicled in a forthcoming "Master Debating" post). I saw a bit of the third quarter of the Nebraska game on a laptop in a lecture hall on the campus of Wilfrid Laurier University, at which point the score was valiant Wolverines 17-10 unwelcome Cornhuskers, though by text message my father informed me that the game wasn't as close as that score indicated; the final score would seem to vindicate his analysis. I had two spirited discussions about Shoelace, one with the Regis coach who is critical of young Mr. Robinson's throwing ability, or lack thereof, & the other with an Alaska debater—from a family of Wolverines—who loves "D-Rob's" unconventional play-making ability. Good times. Not as good as being able to watch the games & thus comment intelligently upon them, but good nonetheless.

Saturday, 19 November
(№ 20) Michigan 45-17 Nebraska (№ 17)
9-2, Big Ten 5-2

Saturday, 12 November
(№ 22) Michigan 31-14 Illinois
8-2, Big Ten 4-2

Next up: The Game, the annual war against the hated Buckeyes. There is no love lost between the states of Michigan & Ohio, nor 'twixt the University of Michigan & THE _{(Ohio State University)}. Go Blue! Beat Ohio!

Go Blue!

Obamboozled | All the Russias | Atlanticism
Cast your mind back to the early days of the Obama Administration, when President Obama & Secretary Clinton talked up a "reset" in Russo-American relations. If only the United States turned her back on ballistic missile defense & left our stalwart Czech & Polish allies, who had angered Russia by agreeing to host radar sites for the under-construction American missile defense umbrella, twisting in the wing, then the Russians would be our friends again & everything would be loveliness & roses. The White House kowtowed to Moscow's demands & scaled back our missile defense plans to the point of uselessness, so now the Russians are threatening to put offensive missiles in East Prussia (the spoils of war that they call Kaliningrad) unless we cancel the feeble efforts still underway: Kremlinology-link. President Obama's reset is awesome! The best part is that our response has come from neither the Department of State nor the National Security Council, but from N.A.T.O. Leading from behind: it's like a dream come true.

This steady retreat in the face of Russian truculence/belligerence is precisely what you voted for in '08, if you voted for Obama-Biden: Wayback Machine (scroll down to "Obamboozled" for more examples of the success of the "reset" policy). The parade of horrors continues unabated!

Coming Attractions
{a} ~~The intersection of "The Explorers Club" & Operation AXIOM, a post on which I spent a good deal of time this afternoon, a mammoth job that I am spreading over several days; due Sunday.~~
{b} "Master Debating": The Air Force Academy at the end of September/beginning of October & Wilfrid Laurier (in the Canadas) last weekend.
{c} "Project PANDORA": OkCupid?

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Mark Ronson featuring The Daptone Horns, "God Put a Smile On Your Face" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-22T18:18:00.003-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXII - The bucentaurs, the state galleys of the Doges of Venice.

We here at the Explorers Club prefer not to use the same images as are found on the Wikipedia, but the model of the last bucentaur's figurehead really has to be seen & we could find no rival to the above photograph, courtesy of the Wikipedia.

Coming in five days, a very special "Operation AXIOM" commemoration of "The Explorers Club."

The Queue
The Craft of Intelligence is a good, thorough introduction to the world of espionage, a book best read before such in-depth examinations as Defend the Realm: The Authorized History of M.I.5* & The Secret History of M.I.6: 1909-1949. Still, interesting to read the thoughts of a longtime head honcho of the C.I.A.

Recently
Kim Newman, Dracula Cha Cha Cha
John Marks, Fangland
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence

Currently
John le Carré, Call for the Dead

Presently
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Dance Hall Crashers, "Triple Track" from Short Music for Short People (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Selected in honor of the Feast Day of Saint Cecilia, patroness of musicians. As I was selecting today's R.B.D.S.O.T.D., I was struck by how many songs on the compilation Short Music for Short People are about the act of musical composition. The runner-up was "The Miracle of Music" by Bog & Doug McKenzie, from their comedy album Great White North.

"Got in a fight with Fat Mike when he called and told me
To write a thirty-second song for his little C.D.
Tried to explain that I needed more to go on,
What motivation? Where is he coming from?

So I distract with a triple track of 'Ahhh-ahhh-ahhh-ahhh,'
Get to the end with my good old friend, the 'Ahhh-ahhh-ahhh-ahhh.'"

This album version of "Triple Track" clocks in at a hefty thirty-three seconds. The even faster live version from D.H.C.'s The Live Record, in twenty-nine.

Monday, 21 November
Lily Allen, "LDN" from Alright, Still (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"When you look with your eyes
Everything seems nice,
But if you look twice
You can see it's all lies."

*Note my inconsistency, using the American title Defend the Realm instead of the original British The Defence of the Realm, while in the same breath using the original British title Dracula Cha Cha Cha instead of the American Judgment of Tears. I should be a happy boy indeed if inconsistency was the gravest of my sins.

2011-11-20T17:29:00.000-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Trey Parker, "America, Fuck Yeah" from Team America: World Police: Music from the Motion Picture (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Liberty! (Fuck yeah!)"

Samstag, 19 November
Barenaked Ladies, "If I Had $1,000,000" from Gordon (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: She's cute, not beautiful, but has "huge… tracts of land." No joy, but all data are useful for Project PANDORA.

Freitag, 18 November
Great Big Sea, "It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" from Play (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I greatly impressed one of the Canuck judges by knowing that Newfoundland had not become a part of the Dominion of Canada 'til 1949. As I said to him, "I know what's what."

2011-11-18T09:31:00.000-05:00

I'm off to the Canadas. Should I fail to return, avenge my death.

2011-11-17T20:17:00.003-05:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Ben Harper and the Relentless7, "Fly One Time" courtesy of The Watergirl (The Watergirl)

Commentary:

"There's no fighting back the years,
So hard to unlearn fears."

2011-11-16T23:11:00.001-05:00

This Week in Motorsport
On Friday, Armistice Day, I was able to watch the Rally Catalunya, recorded the previous Sunday & run two to three weeks before broadcast. 'Twas bughouse even by the standards of the other W.R.C. rallies I've seen. Woo hoo! Rallies are run in timed stages; each car drives the same course, leaving at different intervals; the cumulative times are added up & the lowest time, the quickest car, carries the day. On gravel, or other "loose surface" stages, the first car is at a disadvantage, because it is driving on more loose material than any other car; it's passage will "sweep" the road for the following cars, giving them greater grip, allowing them to take corners at higher speeds. Not so the case in Spain. The first car was reigning World Champion Sébastien Loeb, of Citroën. While his run did sweep the road for the trailing cars, it also threw up a huge plume of dust that he not yet settled to earth by the time Ford's Mikko Hirvonen began his run. Hirvonen ran in almost zero visibility at some points along the stage, severely compromising his pace. Hirvonen's dust mixed with Loeb's, making visibility even worse of the third car, the Citroën piloted by Sébastien Ogier. Rally cars go too fast for the driver to navigate his way without pace notes even under the best of circumstances. In the dust cloud, the situation was all but hopeless.

The dust situation did not persist beyond the first few stages, but by then Loeb had an enormous lead as they heading into the next two days stages, which would be almost all run on tarmac (streets). Loeb is the undisputed master of tarmac. Some stages had both gravel & tarmac portions, which played hell with the cars' performance. The ride height of the cars is set as low as possible on tarmac, & tire pressure is increased; the cars are raised up on their suspensions on gravel, & run on soft, low-pressure tires. It was wild to see the compromises struck to try & balance the variable conditions.

The more I see of the World Rally Championship, the more I like it. A developing issue is that I like both of the Ford drivers, a pair of flying Finns, the aforementioned Hirvonen & the youthful Jari-Matti Latvala. Yet I remain implacably opposed to the Ford Motor Company, for which they race, creating quite the conundrum. In my first year of watching F1, I didn't take sides, I just watched the races. Such has been the case this year in the W.R.C. Can that neutrality persist? I am doubtful, I think it not in my nature. In the accusatory words of Zapp Brannigan, "What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?"

Next up: the race run this past weekend, the Wales Rally G.B., the season finale, to be broadcast the weekend after Thanksgiving.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Antje Duvekot, "Merry-Go-Round" courtesy of The Watergirl (The Watergirl)

2011-11-15T17:35:00.009-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLXI - The Messerschmitt KR175 & KR200.

Armistice Day
One of the things I find puzzling about mine own culture is our strong preference for early celebrations over late celebrations. For example, Ska Army, a saxophonist in a U.S. Army band, marched in a Veterans Day parade on Saturday, 5 November, six days ahead of Veterans Day/Armistice Day/Remembrance Day. Why not on Saturday, 12 November, only one day late? Would not the parade have been all the better for its proximity to the sacred anniversary? This is prelude to a pair on hyperlinks, one about the Queen honoring her subjects, the other a series of photographs from Remembrance Sunday, which is celebrated on the closest Sunday to Remembrance Day, be that Sunday afore or after 11 November (in 2011, after, on 13 November): Dieu et mon droit-link & photo-link.

Project MERCATOR
The late weekend was a social one for your humble narrator. On Friday, I attended the wedding of Dick & Cassie, the lovebirds of The Loose Ties, with Jojo as my date. The wait twixt the wedding & the reception was interminable as the reception was held in the church basement below the chapel in which the wedding was held, thus eliminating the lovely time-consuming commute from site to site. Not knowing either family, except for an acquaintance with Dick's brother Jon, a fill-in "utility" member of The Loose Ties, Jojo & I sat with the band. After some canned (laptop-based) music, The Loose Ties performed, including Cassie in her gown & Dick in his tuxedo; I'd not before skanked in a suit, & found that braces are far better at holding pants in place when the legs inside those pants are not being rhythmically thrust into the air. Glow sticks were to be had, though fortunately the accompanying techno music was no where to be heard. Emerging from the basement to stand in the cold night air & cool down, I was engaged in conversation by two of my fellow guests, a couple, strangers to me. I recounted a brief history of ska & attempted to teach the lady how to skank, a process complicated by her heels though facilitated by her mild intoxication. At Dick's request, I took home a clutch of the cupcakes that were served in lieu of a wedding cake & shared them with my folks.

Despite the late night at the wedding, I was up bright & early on Saturday to join my fellows in the History Club for an excursion to the Henry Ford Museum, which I had not visited since I was a wee bairn. What an extraordinary place! I am still staggered by the size & majesty of 1601, the articulated Allegheny locomotive; suddenly, steampunk seems a far more interesting, not just as a genre of fiction but possibly as a subculture. The automobile collection, by far the largest exhibit, is undergoing renovation, to reopen next year, but we were still able to gape at a goodly number of vehicles, including a variety of presidential limousines (the most infamous being that in which President Kennedy was assassinated); an impossibly extravagant Bugatti Royale (chassis № 41.121); a Ford-powered Lotus Formula One car from the 1960s, though as the plaque was inaccessible I cannot tell you more about the provenance of the beautiful green & yellow machine; & an Oscar Meyer Weinermobile. Weinermobile! I marveled at the collection of 18th & 19th century steam engines; that William Blake described these monuments to Man's ingenuity & eventual creators of unprecedented prosperity as the engines of "dark Satanic Mills" tells you everything you need to know about the disdain with which I regard Blake's tripe. I repeat, what an extraordinary place! We did not tour Greenfield Village, nor the Automotive Hall of Fame, & as aforementioned the car collection was largely inaccessible; so, a return trip is most certainly in order.

Project GLOWWORM
In the aftermath of the evening, I am having the devil of a time getting my braces cleaned, both of my usual dry cleaners being scared off by the leather bits that houses the holes through which are slipped the pants' buttons, attaching the braces to the pants. I'd not foreseen this difficulty, & shall have to consult my clothier for cleaning advice.

The fellow to whom I recounted the brief history of ska made a big deal of my moustache & seemed quite impressed that I'd been growing it for fourteen months. He, like his lady, was mildly intoxicated.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Lily Allen, "Cheryl Tweedy" from the Smile E.P. (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"I wish my life was a little less seedy.
Why am I always so greedy?
Wish I looked just like Cheryl Tweedy,
I know I never will,
I know I never will."

2011-11-14T22:52:00.006-05:00

The Queue
Fangland is a fraud, the book is not the "re-imagining" of Dracula it purports to be. Instead, the hack uses the basic framework of Bram Stoker's immortal novel—an innocent is lured to Transylvania under false pretenses by a fiend who eventually travels to the dupe's home metropolis—to tell a ponderous & pretentious ghost story. Worst of all, the hack commits to sin of recycling one & only one character name from Dracula: the protagonist's surname is Harker. Use all, or at least most, of the character names from Dracula, or use none of them. To use only one betrays a base attempt to cash in on a better author's efforts. (See Kim Newman's Anno Dracula to see how a writer pays homage to his better.) The book, a bloated, self-important mess from beginning to end, is a crying shame. The title is rubbish, the "vampire" doesn't have fangs & isn't a vampire at all.

Recently
William F. Buckley, Jr., Saving the Queen
Kim Newman, Dracula Cha Cha Cha
John Marks, Fangland

Currently
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence

Presently
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
Len Deighton, City of Gold

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Paul McCartney, "Live and Let Die" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Extraordinary circumstances are required for me to endorse the work of Sir Paul McCartney, & today was Bond-heavy enough to qualify. Early this morning I traded in a book I didn't want for a good-as-brand-new copy of Live and Let Die, the second 007 novel, & after a television advertisement for Mission: Impossible: Ghost Protocol prompted a mocking discussion of the Mission: Impossible film franchise, I was able to give my pop the mixed news about the next Bond picture, Skyfall: Daniel Craig returns as Bond, but the film is to be directed by the dreadful Sam Mendes. I live in hope.

"What does it matter to ya?
When you got a job to do,
You got to do well,
You got to give the other fella hell!"

Sonntag, 13 November
Queen, "Somebody to Love" from Greatest Hits I (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Can anybody find me somebody to love?" I have my doubts.

2011-11-12T07:44:00.001-05:00

~~For The Secret Base's last word on Armistice Day 'til next year,~~ There are some lovely photographic remembrances of Remembrance Day observances herein: 93rd-link.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
They Might Be Giants, "Spiralling Shape" from Factory Showroom (T.L.A.M.)

2011-11-11T11:00:00.015-05:00

Armistice Day
At the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month, Anno Domini 1918, the guns fell silent on the Western Front; the Great War, the First World War, was ended. The Great War seems terribly far away from our world of iPads & the eurozone crisis, & indeed it grows more distant year on year: the last survivor of the American Expeditionary Force, Frank Buckles, perished in February of this very year; the last combat veteran of the war, Claude Choules of the Royal Navy & the Royal Australian Navy, met his demise in May '11; there is only one known living veteran remaining, Florence Greeen of the Women's Royal Air Force, born 1901. When she passes, a link will be severed. The duty will fall to us, the children, grandchildren, & great-grandchildren of those who knew the glory & the folly of the Weltkrieg, to remember the triumphs & the tragedies of 1914-1918; lest we fall prey to the same vainglory, the same misjudgments & errors, lest it all happen again. Lest we forget.

I encountered a Canadian fellow on Sunday, after Mass when Mother & I motored to the mall to find the new winter coat I'd requested as a Christmas gift. He was getting into his motorcar & we exited hers, & I spied a Remembrance Day poppy on his parka. I'd desired such a poppy pin, much like the one seen above, for several years, but had not found a way to acquire one here in the States, & only last year did I acquire the enhanced operator's license now necessary to cross the American-Canadian frontier (by land or sea, but not by air). I smiled as I approached his vehicle & gently knocked on the driver's window. He lowered the window & I begged his pardon, asking him where he had acquired his Remembrance Day poppy. He replied that they were easy enough to find, he'd acquired his from the Legion, for a charitable donation. I grasped his meaning, the Royal Canadian Legion—their leading veterans' organization—& thus divined his origin; of course, I replied, in the Canadas. Canada, as part of the British Empire, joined the mother country, Great Britain; her fellow dominions of Australia, New Zealand, Newfoundland, & South Africa; & India & the rest of the colonies in fighting all four years of that unremitting nightmare, & unto the present day commemorates the Armistice with Remembrance Day, the remembrance of the glorious dead. I was about to thank him for his time, & bid him a good day & a safe journey, when he caught me off guard by offering me the poppy pin. I asked if he was sure, which he was, & thanked him as he handed over the small badge, thin plastic covered with felt or some approximation. I thanked him again & we came to the parting of the ways; I've worn the poppy since, explaining its significance when asked, which was not as frequently as I'd hoped. I'm obliged to the gentleman, an exemplar of his country's renowned politeness.

As ever, my reverence for Armistice Day at the expense of Veterans Day* is not intended as a slight against those still living who have fought on my behalf in all of America's wars, both hot & Cold. But I hold that we forget the specific lessons of 1914-1918, of trench warfare & the Chemists' War, at our grave peril. The Commonwealth's commemoration of Remembrance Day is, for that purpose, better suited than our Veterans Day. (It may be tiresome to regular readers that I repeat this apology every Armistice Day, but I am desperate not to be misunderstood.) Lest we forget. War on a large scale, war that engulfs nations & lasts years or generations, was a distant memory to the Europe of that fateful summer of 1914, just as it is to the Europe of the restless fall of 2011. Lest we forget. Lest the bane of internecine war again befall the Western liberal democracies. When we assume that the potential for such warfare is no longer in our midst, then are we most vulnerable to its pernicious influence. Lest we forget.

"The Anxious Dead"
by John McCrae

O guns, fall silent till the dead men hear
Above their heads the legions pressing on;
(These fought their fight in time of bitter fear,
And died not knowing how the day had gone.)

O flashing muzzles, pause, and let them see
The coming dawn that streaks the sky afar;
Then let your mighty chorus witness be
To them, and Caesar, that we still make war.

Tell them, o guns, that we have heard their call,
That we have sworn, and will not turn aside,
That we will onward till we win or fall,
That we will keep the faith for which they died.

Bid them be patient, and some day, anon,
They shall feel earth enwrapt in silence deep;
Shall greet, in wonderment, the quiet dawn,
And in content may turn them to their sleep.

"Corporal Stare"
by Robert Graves

Back from the line one night in June,
I gave a dinner at Bethune—
Seven courses, the most gorgeous meal
Money could buy or batmen steal.
Five hungry lads welcomed the fish
With shouts that nearly cracked the dish;
Asparagus came with tender tops,
Strawberries in cream, and mutton chops.
Said Jenkins, as my hand he shook,
"They'll put this in the history book."
We bawled Church anthems in choro
Of Bethlehem and Hermon snow,
With drinking songs, a jolly sound
To help the good red Pommard round.
Stories and laughter interspersed,
We drowned a long La Bassée thirst—
Trenches in June make throats damned dry.
When through the window, suddenly,
Badge, stripes, and medals all complete,
We saw him swagger up the street,
Just like a live man—Corporal Stare!
Stare! Killed last May at Festubert.
Caught on patrol near the Boche wire,
Torn horribly by machine-gun fire!
He paused, saluted smartly, grinned,
Then passed away like a puff of wind,
Leaving us blank astonishment.
The song broke, up we started, leant
Out of the window—nothing there,
Not the least shadow of Corporal Stare,
Only a quiver of smoke that showed
A fag-end dropped on the silent road.

*I prefer the spelling Veterans' Day, regarding it as more apropos, but the official government designation of the holiday is Veterans Day. I bow to officialdom, the authorized executors of the electorate's will.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Armistice Day
Great Big Sea, "Recruiting Sergeant" from Play (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"…
Enlist, ye Newfoundlanders, and come follow me.

And it's over the mountains and over the sea,
Come, brave Newfoundlanders, and join the Blue Puttees,
You'll fight the Hun in Flanders, and at Gallipoli,
Enlist, ye Newfoundlanders, and come follow me."

2011-11-10T09:12:00.003-05:00

Operation AXIOM
Thirty-six years ago to the day, 10 November 1975, the S.S. Edmund Fitzgerald, at the time of her construction the largest "boat" on the Great Lakes, sank beneath the waves of Lake Superior, claiming all twenty-nine souls aboard. Your humble narrator has spent most of his life in sacred Michigan, but remains very much a landlubber. 'Tis so easy to take our Great Lakes for granted, to imagine them as mere lakes, really just exaggerated ponds, rather than the inland seas they really are, fraught with peril & myriad ways for a man to meet his demise.

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Gordon Lightfoot, "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Like everyone else, I'd have only the vaguest awareness of the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald without "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald."

Mittwoch, 9 November
MxPx, "Emotional Anarchist" from Panic (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The liner notes to Panic use the archaic spelling "pist" for the word latterly rendered as "pissed." Fascinating.

"You're an emotional anarchist,
You're pist 'cause you never been kissed,
You're drowning in a sea of anarchy,
With your heart upon your patches
And no faith in democracy."

2011-11-08T20:44:00.004-05:00

Pray pardon the paucity of posts, but I've been blindsided by a most uncharacteristic heat wave, utterly unacceptable for November. The temperatures are only in the mid-60s, but the effect is amplified because ever building still has its central heat cranked up as it the afternoon highs we in the 40s. Additionally, it's humid, humid like August is humid. It's muggy. It's hot & muggy (high fives all around) in cotton-picking November & the furnaces are blasting away. Pardon my language, but this is a clusterfuck.

"This aggression will not stand, man."

Project GLOWWORM
I woke up early this morning & trimmed by beard, which I was supposed to do last Friday. One again, I trimmed it too short. Late & too short! Have I learned nothing? Late & too short, & for no good reason. Great Caesar's ghost, Mike, get your head in the game! Jackass.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Ben Folds featuring Regina Spektor, "You Don't Know Me" from Way to Normal (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: A burned C.D. of Way to Normal was given me by a relative much more fond Ben Folds than I. I did not ask for this album, nor the other Ben Folds albums he's gifted me, but it's unpardonably rude to refuse a gift; there's nothing for it but to smile & say, "Thank you." I junked more than half of the songs, but retained a handful, including, as you might have guessed, "You Don't Know Me."

2011-11-07T21:14:00.003-05:00

Autobahn
I saw a vanity license plate this afternoon about which I've not yet decided on an opinion. The motorcar was a B.M.W. 550i with the plate BMW550I. The plate is not clever, but the question is whether it is obnoxiously dull or so intentionally dull as to come all the way around the horn & become amusing. I am, as aforementioned, undecided. Thoughts?

This Week in Motorsport
Velocity, the automobile-themed name by which Discovery's H.D. Theater channel has been re-branded, aired the Rally Catalunya (Rally de España) this weekend, but I've not yet had the chance to watch the rally, which was run a fortnight hence. Rallying: Embrace the madness.

Rally monkey!

The Rebe Black Dot Song of the Day
They Might Be Giants, "I Palindrome I" from Apollo 18 (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"Someday Mother will die and I'll get the money,
Mom leans down and says, 'My sentiments exactly,
'You son of a bitch.'"

2011-11-06T10:33:00.010-05:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLX - Simo Häyhä (1905-2002), "the White Death," sniper extraordinaire, with over five hundred confirmed kills in fewer than one hundred days of combat.

The subject of this episode of "The Explorers Club" was nominated by The Watergirl, this blog's most active audience contributor. Your humble narrator owes her a great debt for her continued enthusiasm & participation. The White Death!

The Queue
The Craft of Intelligence was briefly suspended whilst a sated a jones for the third, & thus far latest, volume in Kim Newman's Anno Dracula series. Dracula Cha Cha Cha had a better ending than either Anno Dracula or The Bloody Red Baron, the very thing that spoilt both earlier efforts, though it could just be that I am now more accustomed to the way in which Newman's books don't so much conclude as just end. After my time amongst the vampires, I'm back to the world of spies & saboteurs with Mr. Dulles, though we both know I'm not yet done with the undead.

Recently
Keith Jeffery, The Secret History of M.I.6: 1909-1949
William F. Buckley, Jr., Saving the Queen
Kim Newman, Dracula Cha Cha Cha

Currently
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence

Presently
John Marks, Fangland
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
David Ignatius, Body of Lies

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Littlest Man Band, "Better Man" from Better Book Ends (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"Lie and cheat your friends while you still have time,
And downplay the drama while you figure out a clever rhyme,
Smile with a semi-sympathetic tone,
Can't appreciate good friends until you find your own,
And I'm just trying to be a better man.
Yeah, I'm just trying to be a better man."

2011-11-05T15:46:00.008-04:00

The Victors
Iowa 24-16 Michigan (№ 13)
7-2, Big Ten 3-2

I ask a philosophical question, What is the purpose of having instant reply when it does not overturn incorrect calls? The player had possession of the ball & his knee came down in bounds, how is that not a touchdown? I can forgive the error on the part of the on-field officials, because it happened swiftly, but the replay official calls into question the entire video review system. I do say with confidence, however, that not a single one of those officials will be deemed sufficient to officiate the inaugural Big Ten Championship game, to be held in a month's time.

Also, drat! The fault for today's loss lies principally with our own anemic offense. What madness would lead anyone, even a boob like the hateful Al Borges, to take the valiant Wolverines' greatest offensive weapon, quarterback Denard "Shoelace" Robinson, off the field? Devin Gardner played one complete series—a three & out—when Shoelace was shaken up. That is the right & appropriate rôle for your Mr. Gardner. Otherwise, inserting Gardner into the line-up at the expense of Shoelace is foolishness, as unwise as the replacement of Tom Brady—who went on to have a mildly successful career in the N.F.L.—with Drew Henson was in '98 & '99 (foolishness that directly cost us at least one loss, & contributed a several more). Why is Al Borges alone unable to see the play-making talent of your Mr. Robinson? It is sad that opposition defensive coordinators more rightly access the valiant Wolverines' quarterback's talents than does the man in charge of the valiant Wolverines' offense. Borges is a bum, & at this juncture might well be doing Michigan far more harm than good. What, if anything, will Coach Hoke do about this very unfortunate circumstance?

All that said, the tenacious Hawkeyes are, & always have been under their coach Kirk Ferentz, a very inconsistent team. The analogy of Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde leaps to mind. One week, they are world-beaters, able to take even the best teams in the country down to the wire; the next, they lose to a cream puff like the luckless Golden Gophers of Minnesota. The luckless Golden Gophers prevailed over Mr. Hyde last Saturday; the valiant Wolverines succumbed to Dr. Jekyll this afternoon. Curse the luck, but that's why the play the games.

What now? Under Head Coach Brady Hoke, the valiant Wolverines' defense is much improved, but the offense is at best no better & at worst much less effective. The valiant Wolverines are able to beat up on the lesser teams in the Big Ten, such as the ill-starred Boilermakers & the luckless Golden Gophers, but are vulnerable against the better teams, such as the dastardly Spartans & the Dr. Jekyll tenacious Hawkeyes. What lessons can be draw ahead of the last three games of the year, against the feisty Illini, the unwelcome Cornhuskers, & the hated Buckeyes? I can't even pretend to have objectivity enough to comment? WHY DOES BORGES INSIST ON TAKING SHOELACE OUT OF THE GAME? IS HE INSANE?! *inarticulate grunt of frustration* Yeah, Michigan's 7-2, but of which of those seven victories are you proud? Whom have we defeated who's worth a tinker's damn? I so desperately hope my instincts about Brady Hoke are wrong.

Go Blue!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The University of Michigan Marching Band, "Little Brown Jug" from A Saturday Tradition (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I considered John Linnell's song, "Iowa," which is quite insistent on the point, "Iowa is a witch," but rejected the idea as unsportsmanlike. The tenacious Hawkeyes won fair & square.

All I can say in defense of my indefensible oversight in not selecting "Little Brown Jug" as the R.B.S.D.O.T.D. on the day the valiant Wolverines defeated the luckless Golden Gophers is that I was out of state on the day, I did not see the game, & that day's R.B.D.S.O.T.D., John Linnell's "Michigan," had been specifically & repeated sung by Ska Army & your humble narrator on the day in question. All that said, that can be no defending the indefensible. I was wrong & I am sorry.

Freitag, 4 November
The Aquabats!, "The Legend is True!" from Hi-Five Soup! (Captain Thumbs-up)

Commentary:

"And there across the sky
I can see what makes the legend,
The legend is true!
And it's you, yeah,
You are the legend and the legend is true!"

2011-11-05T13:23:00.000-04:00

The Victors: Halftime
Iowa 17-6 Michigan (№ 13)

I have nothing against Devin Gardner, but I've reached the conclusion that I not only disagree with Offensive Coordinator Al Borges's tactic of inserting Gardner in at quarterback on truly random plays, but actually hate Borges. I want some thrice-damned ne'er-do-well to gut that corpulent blighter like a fish, to leave whatever remains of the remains on public display as a warning to others about the perils of being too clever by half. Under Coach Rodriguez, it seemed necessary constantly to remind him & his staff, though those reminders went unheeded, that it did not matter how well the offense played if the defense couldn't ever stop the opposing offense. It seems increasingly necessary to remind Coach Hoke & his staff that it doesn't matter how well the defense plays if the offense can't put up a reasonable number of points. Why do we continue to hire dimwits who only see one-half of what is a gloriously multifaceted game? *grumble grumble*

Go Blue!

2011-11-04T11:42:00.002-04:00

Honolulu Blue Nevermore
This item in the sports news made me happy: $-link. I hate the Ford family & I hate the Ford Motor Company, but I don't hate the Detroit Lions; I am indifferent, not hostile. This story makes me happy because it belatedly acknowledges that which prompted me to abandon my theretofore lifelong love of the Lions, viz. the monstrous incompetence of William Clay Ford, Sr. I simply could not countenance rooting for a team that helped line the pockets of that fiend; mayhap I should reconsider my position now that Ford's almost impressively inept ownership is costing his horrible family some portion of their massive Jew-hating fortune?

I jest, of course; nevermore means nevermore. The Devil take the Fords!

2011-11-03T18:34:00.004-04:00

The Middle Kingdom
Way back in the '90s, when I was a disinterested & incompetent high school debater—partnered with The Muppet, elder brother of K. Steeze—we talked about the rise o' China & used the P.R.C.'s increasingly aggressive territorial assertiveness as an example that not everything about that rise was sunshine & rainbows. In those halcyon days, we focused on the Spratly Islands. Everything old is new again: South China Sea-link. American naval might in the western Pacific is the regional stability & the preservation of the peace. To that end, it is vital that we not make the drastic cuts to the Navy that President Obama & the distressingly isolationist elements of the Republican Congressional caucus have proposed in the name of austerity. Such proposals are penny wise & pound foolish; the price to be paid, both economic & political, from allowing Chinese hegemony in the South China Sea, & elsewhere in the western Pacific, would be staggering. American retreat is a wholly artificial phenomenon that augurs ill for all the world; I would beseech Mr. Obama to make a forceful argument for the virtues of American dominance in the western Pacific.

The Stars My Destination
The return of the faux-cosmonauts of the Mars-500 project: not quite the Red Planet-link. A manned mission to Mars is within our technical abilities, we need only commit the resources. Would not the sight of men walking on Mars be more inspirational that N.A.S.A.'s current, fuzzy plans to "land" astronauts on an asteroid? I'm all for exploring & even mining asteroids, but after three decades of low Earth orbit malaise what the world's collaborative space programs need is a "Wow!" moment, such as a Mars landing. Let us hope Mars-500 has contributed to making the argument for the feasibility of conquering the Red Planet.

This is not the first mention of Mars-500 here at The Secret Base: Wayback Machine.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Lalo Schifrin, "Mission: Impossible (Main Title)" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: From my playlist "Spy" in honor of the new season of Burn Notice. Welcome back, Miss Glenanne & Messers. Westen, Axe, & Porter!

2011-11-02T20:29:00.001-04:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Go Sailor, "Windy" from Go Sailor (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"So, go ahead and marry her,
And don't mind me,
That's what I get for being blind.
…
So, go ahead and marry her,
It's what you want,
I hope that your forever stays,
…
So, go ahead and marry her,
She's really nice,
She's everything that I can't be.
I just hope that somewhere in your wedded bliss
You find the time to think of me,
I hope you think of me."

2011-11-01T17:47:00.002-04:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
They Might Be Giants, "Particle Man" from Flood (Red Patton)

Commentary:

"Is he a dot or is speck?
When he's underwater does he get wet,
Or does the water get him instead?"

Code Name: Chaos
"Red Patton" is the new Secret Base code name of my pal Tony, a great admirer of General George Patton, who also happens to be politically left-wing. Tony is a World War II buff, & I considered giving him the code name "Patton > Eisenhower," but deemed it too cumbersome. If circumstance ever affords you the opportunity, provoke Red Patton into a rant about President Eisenhower, who he argues not only wasn't a particularly good general, but "wasn't really a general" at all. Hilarity for history nerds!

2011-11-01T09:01:00.000-04:00

Operation AXIOM | Urbi et Orbi
'Tis All Saints' Day, 'tis a holy day of obligation. (This is why Hallowe'en is called Hallowe'en, "All Hallows' Eve.") May all the saints of the Church Triumphant pray for those of us yet in the Church Militant & the Church Penitent, as we are all one in the Christ.

Atlanticism: Maghreb Edition
Count me an enthusiastic supporter of Tunisia's post-dictatorship prosecution of corruption: warrant-link. If the widow Arafat was anything like her late, unlamented husband—both a Nobel Peace Laureate & an unrepentant supporter of suicide bombings to the day he died—then she must be guilty of staggering corruption, avarice beyond conception. May she face swift & sure justice.

This Week in Motorsport
The Buddh International Circuit is magnificent, as was the inaugural Indian Grand Prix! Respects were paid to the tragedies of the late fortnight: the death of driver Dan Wheldon in the IndyCar fiasco at Las Vegas & the death of rider Marco Simoncelli in a Moto G.P. race in Malaysia. I am very glad that these are not the bad old days, when deaths in motorsport were commonplace, but the mere fact that today's grand prix was held confirms that, in John Hodgman's memorable words, "we will not be cowed by death." They were not the first to die, &, alas, they shan't be the last. That they were willing to risk life & limb signals, me thinks, that they would want the races to continue. Messers. Simoncelli & Wheldon, requiescat in pace.

Reigning double World Champion Sebastian Vettel completed what Speed's commentators—the collective "Ben" Kenobi to my F1 Luke Skywalker; it is difficult to overstate how influential Bob Varsha, David Hobbs, Steve Matchett, Will Buxton, & Peter Windsor have been in fostering my understanding of Formula One—described as a "grand slam": start from pole, lead every lap, set the fastest lap, & win the grand prix. With the pole, Vettel's thirteenth on the year, Red Bull set a new team record for the most poles in a season: sixteen. The previous record, fifteen, held by McLaren, was set during a sixteen-round season; so, while Red Bull have claimed the record, they need to earn the pole in both of the remaining grands prix to equal McLaren's achievement of all-but-one over the course of a season. The thirteenth pole also tied Vettel for second, with triple World Champion Ayrton Senna ('88, '90, & '91) & quadruple World Champion Alain Prost ('85, '86, '89, & '93), for numbers of poles in a season; one more is required to tie '92 World Champion Nigel Mansell's record of fourteen. These are heady times for those of us who jumped on the Red Bull bandwagon. Woo hoo! (We shall save any wide-ranging philosophical discussions of fandom & reflected glory for another occasion, thank you very much.)

There does not appear as if there will be as much activity in the market for drivers between '11 & '12 as there was 'twixt '10 & '11 or '09 & '10, but there might yet be some moves. Lotus Renault have four drivers in the frame, including reigning GP2 Champion Romain Grosjean, who drove for Renault in '09, before he was ready & when the Renault car was hapless (even in the hands of double World Champion Fernando Alonso). Force India (Mercedes) might give Adrian Sutil's seat to '09 GP2 Champion Nico Hülkenberg, who drove for cash-strapped Williams (Cosworth) in '10 before the team sold its corporate soul for Hugo Chávez's petrodollars. Rubens Barrichello, the most experienced driver in F1 history, might not have a drive, since both he & Williams seem eager to part company. (Williams will switch to Renault engines next season.)

The United States Grand Prix is to return next season, at the brand-new, purpose-build Circuit of the Americas outside Austin, Texas. It was announced this week that in '13 the U.S. will host a second F1 grand prix, the "Grand Prix of America" in New Jersey, on a street circuit opposite the New York City skyline. Holy moley! The best part of this news is that is resolves a personal dilemma: I want to see F1 grow in these United States, & so wished to attend next year's U.S. Grand Prix. At the same time, though, I wish sincerely never again to debase myself by setting footing in the State of Texas. With the Grand Prix of America at the Port Imperial Street Circuit, I can have my cake & eat it, too, both supporting F1's presence in the land of the free/home of the brave & not subjecting myself to those jerks in the worst state in the Union! Win-win!

2011-10-31T12:34:00.003-04:00

Operation AXIOM
Happy Halloween! I'm a terribly glad that I decided to reengage with Halloween from '09 onward. I'm well-pleased by the now annual tradition of a week of R.B.D.S.O.T.D. dedicated to the spookiest time of the year, though less pleased by the fact that I just don't get invited to Halloween parties. (I recognize the contradiction of my position, that in the main I am glad not to be invited to most parties, even though it handcuffs me regarding Halloween. I've yet to devise a workaround, aside from the risible option of hosting mine own Halloween party.) Mayhap next year I shall set aside my own distaste for "haunted houses" & organize an outing around patronizing one. The pumpkins are carved & the candy is ready to be dispensed to suitably attired trick-or-treaters. Let the ghoulish festivities begin!

You know, in all these years I've never cut eye-holes in a sheet & worn that as a ghost costume. It's crummy, sure, but also a kitschy classic. Boo!

Operation AXIOM | Project PANDORA
I need to meet a girl who could pull off this as a costume:

The Rebel Black Dot Song of Halloween
Warren Zevon, "Werewolves of London" courtesy of The Watergirl (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"He's the hairy-handed gent
Who ran amok in Kent.
Lately, he's been overheard in Mayfair.
You better stay away from him,
He'll rip your lungs out, Jim!
I'd like to meet his tailor."

2011-10-30T18:22:00.002-04:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLIX - Igor Gouzenko (1919-1982) & the Gouzenko Affair (1945), described by some as marking the beginning of the Cold War.

Urbi et Orbi
I had a jones to watch the videotaped inaugural Indian Grand Prix this morning, & did so in lieu of attending Mass at eleven o'clock. I paid a hefty price for attending the five o'clock Mass: the "contemporary" music, featuring no use of the usual hymnal. I always forget just how much I loathe that acoustic guitar-driven, too-hippie-by-half cacophony. Let us hope this time I've learnt my lesson. Achtung, Dummkopf! Verboten!

The Savage Wars of Peace
The tyrant is dead—& three cheers for that—but 'twould be an error to end N.A.T.O.'s mission in the Libyan skies when the future of that benighted country is so very much up in the air: cut & run-link. American leadership in this instance could turn the tide, but President Obama, "leading from behind" as ever, will be eager to beat a hasty retreat, just as he has in Iraq, where his administration's failure to negotiate in good faith with the Iraqi government has lead to the decision to withdraw all U.S. forces from Mesopotamia, which might yet snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. Crossing our collective fingers & hoping for the best is neither a foreign policy nor a national security strategy.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Orson Welles & the Mercury Theatre on the Air players, The War of the Worlds from The War of the Worlds: Original Radio Broadcast (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Broadcast seventy-three years ago to the day, 30 October 1938. At fifty-seven minutes in duration, this is far & away the longest yet R.B.D.S.O.T.D.

"This is Orson Welles, ladies & gentlemen, out of character to assure you that The War of the Worlds has no further significance than as the holiday offering it was intended to be, the Mercury Theatre's own radio version of dressing up in a sheet & jumping out of a bush & saying, "Boo!" Starting now, we couldn't soap all your windows & steal all your garden gates by tomorrow night; so, we did the best next thing: we annihilated the world before your very ears & utterly destroyed the C.B.S. You will be relieved, I hope, to learn that we didn't mean it, & that both institutions are still open for business. So, goodbye, everybody, & remember, please, for the next day or so the terrible lesson you learned tonight. That grinning, glowing, globular invader of your living room is an inhabitant of the pumpkin patch, & if your doorbell rings & nobody's there, that was no Martian, it's Halloween."

2011-10-29T23:04:00.003-04:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Champions of Breakfast, "Tame the Wolf" from Pleasure Mountain (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Wolf, as in werewolf. The lyrics include what appears to my ears to be a reference to An American Werewolf in London. Wishful thinking on my part? I know both members of Champions of Breakfast; so, I'll have to ask them one day, if I remember.

2011-10-28T20:54:00.006-04:00

What an altogether awful day! The misery was self-inflicted in that I once again, despite repeatedly learning the hard way the lesson that no good deed goes unpunished, lent a hand to a worthy undertaking. Were it not for my conscience, founded in my faith in the Christ, I'd be a complete bastard, one with a stone heart, cold & immune to idiots' cries for assistance. There are days when I envy that hypothetical bastard, & only with adequate temporal distance do I regain the perspective to realize that for all the worldly suffering of the day, I've the far better lot than he. The poor devil triumphs in the moment only to perish in the long run. To sleep, & thus to put this horrid day in my rear view mirror, will be a great relief.

Project MERCATOR
The Psych watching party on Wednesday last went well. I caught glimpses of the old annoyances, but the initial sources of fondness were more often & thoroughly evinced. As a bonus, the new episode of Psych, "This Episode Sucks," was a hoot, even by the high standards of Psych's usual brilliance. I am well pleased by how the reunion-esque shindig fared.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Dr. John & The Blues Brothers Band, "Season of the Witch" from Blues Brothers 2000: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Beatniks are out to make it rich."

2011-10-27T23:59:00.002-04:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Bobby "Boris" Pickett & The Crypt-Kickers, "Monster Mash" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: A standard without which no Halloween party is complete.

"Out from his coffin Drac's voice did ring,
Seems he was troubled by just one thing,
Opened the lid and shook his fist
And said, 'Whatever happened to my Transylvania twist?'"

2011-10-26T17:34:00.002-04:00

Project MERCATOR
I am hosting "the old Econ. Club gang" tonight, for what has been named a Good Old-fashioned Psych Watching Party. The Cowgirl cannot attend, but I am expecting The Most Dangerous Game, The Impossible Ingenue, Vitamin H., & their old hometown chum, with whom I have interacted on many occasions when at The Game's & The Ingenue's parents' home, High Functioning. An occasional Econ. Club member, who has never been code named, Carmelle, is also expected. I am torn between a desire to recapture the good old days—these are the girls who gave Project MERCATOR almost all its start-up capital, at a time when I was isolated & lonely—& a dread that this night will be a microcosm of all the reason why I've not spent nearly as much time with them over the past year. Of course, given my hermitic nature, that tension is historically commonplace.

Code Name: CHAOS
High Functioning's brand-new code name derives from the fact that he's an odd young man, intelligent & beset by all manner of odd mannerisms. In our diagnosis-obsessed culture, it is no longer acceptable just to be weird or different; that weirdness must have a name, the difference must be explained by a chronic medical condition. In my head, I've jested that High Functioning would be described as being on the high functioning end of the "autism spectrum," probably to be diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. This is nothing but a joke in bad taste on my part, I do not suspect there is anything amiss with High Functioning; he's just an odd duck. I'm an odd duck myself, & Bog only knows what the hysterical physicians & parents of today would say about the late-'80s me, in all his glorious oddity. Later, in the '90s, I used to ask, "Mike Wilson: Bizarrely honest or honestly bizarre?"

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Creedence Clearwater Revival, "Bad Moon Rising" from Chronicle: 20 Greatest Hits (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Online sources give the last line of the second verse as, "…I hear the voice of rage and ruin," but I've always heard it as, "…I hear the voice of raze and ruin." Did I err? Of course, when consulting online sources, it is always a hazard that multiple sources are simply repeating stations one for another; so, fifty websites might give the same erroneous information, each perpetuating an earlier mistake. I could just as easily me wrong, but to my mind raze is a more fitting companion for ruin than is rage. I do not claim to be unbiased.

"Don't go 'round tonight,
Well, it's bound to take your life,
There's a bad moon on the rise."

2011-10-25T19:54:00.005-04:00

Project MERCATOR
On the Wednesday of the week before last & the Monday of last week, after two consecutive debate practices, I dined out with Ska Army. Too Sly joined us on the first occasion, in what had to one of the most bawdy conversations to which I've been a party. I was the chief instigator of the bawdiness. I don't know precisely what was the source of my odd humor, if I simply surrendered myself to the sports bar atmosphere in which we had placed ourselves (the Detroit Tigers were still playing then, battling on a number of exceedingly large television screens against the Texas Rangers), but I was of a very peculiar mood & launched into what was, by my prim standards, some very raunchy talk. Girls were more prized for their physiques than their intellects in our discussion, & the nation's distaff debaters were cited as one of the activity's principal charms. The following Monday, when Ska Army & I dined downtown, I could not help but see myself mirrored in the lad; he is desperately infatuated with an old friend of his, the newest master debater, & hasn't the slightest inkling of how doomed his hopes are. I freely admit to my ineptitude in reading persons, their intentions & desires, but I'd wager my last pfennig that the lady has no romantic interest in Ska Army. His ardor is genuine, but doomed nonetheless. I see in him the same madness that seized me during my forlorn, distasteful longing for The Impossible Ingenue, of which I remain deeply ashamed. His pursuit, unlike mine, is age-appropriate. Like me, though, there's no talking any sense into him; he'll not accept the sad truth of his situation 'til he stumbles upon it himself. I hope for my friend's sake that I am wrong, but know that I am not. Doom, doom, doom.

Last Friday, I paid my first visit to The Machine Shop, Flint's far-famed heavy metal/hard rock club. It is the metropolitan area's premier musical venue, but, again, 'tis a metal club; why would I ever go to such a place? To see The Loose Ties, of course, playing a gig where they were out of place, because in these desperate days‚stretching back a full decade—a ska band is always out of place. I escorted my new pal Jojo, with whom I'd made plans to sped the evening before I learned of the show (The Loose Ties were an eleventh-hour replacement); once I learned of the show, the two engagements dovetailed nicely. The worst bit of a night was an adoring fan… of mine, a vague acquaintance from campus, one of that puzzling throng who seem to think I'm some manner of guru. Honestly, kid, I have no interest in hearing about your latest visit to, as they call it in Saint Louis, the titty bar, except to say that you should never again defile yourself by visiting a house of iniquity. Conversation with Jojo was difficult due to the combination of the gadfly & the canned music coming through the speakers, but I had previously introduced Jojo to Farr Afield, who in turn introduced her to The Redhead, & the three of them gabbed at great length. The Redhead & I tried to teach Jojo how to skank during The Loose Ties' set, with only a little success. Still, enthusiasm is more vital than physical coordination, & was in no short supply.

We left The Machine Shop at the same time as Ska Army, who was very excited to share with me the fruits of his first foray into the home-brewing realm. I accepted four bottles of his home-brew (I have since drunk two of the bottles & yet retain my eyesight, always a concern when moonshine is involved). After I'd let Jojo into Lumi the Snow Queen's passenger seat & closed the door, Ska Army made am obscure gesture, one could even call it an inside joke, which he coupled with the raised eyebrows of a query. No, I told him, I had no amorous designs on Jojo, she's too young for me/I'm too old for her. (Jojo is older than The Impossible Ingenue, but still falls foul of the "half your age plus seven" rule of thumb, which I now follow in the interests of propriety.) She was hungry, so we repaired to the Firkin & Fox, an establishment of which everyone seems inordinately more fond than I. We shared "Irish nachos," which turned out to be waffle fries (always a plus) with green onions, bacon, & a white sauce I can't quite identify, but was nothing too exotic. Jojo wished to go on, but by this point in the evening it was too late to go anywhere but a bar & too late to go back to one of our places & just hang out (the calculation might well have been different if making out had been in the offing); so, I drove her home, received a parting hug, & motored home.

I had not skanked for months, & the next morning my calves were no fans of my reckless enthusiasm. I'd say I was getting to old for this #%*@, but I already got too old for this #&*@ quite a while ago. To quote a pair of Jamaican chaps I met last spring in Burlington, Vermont, "Ska, ska, ska."

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Aquabats!, "The Thing on the Bass Amp!" from The Aquabats! vs. The Floating Eye of Death! and Other Amazing Adventures, Vol. 1 (Captain Thumbs-up)

Commentary: Welcome to our second annual R.B.D.S.O.T.D. celebration of Halloween. "The Thing on the Bass Amp!" has nothing specifically do to with Halloween, but it well-suited to our purposes because it describes a creepy monster, an insidious presence in the midst of the unsuspecting. It also includes the lyrics, "It's alive!" and sinister cackling. By contrast, "Fashion Zombies!," from Charge!!, has a good Halloween-appropriate title, but is about the real definition of zombie, someone who has surrendered their will to another & acts as a mindless automaton (in this case as a slave to fashion), not the brain-devouring "zombies" of popular culture—which more closely resembles the vampire of Balkan folklore than do the sparkly, tormented hero "vampires" of modern pop culture. Back to "The Thing on the Bass Amp!":

"The thing… that climbs into your head at night,
The thing… with selfish teeth and greedy eyes,
The thing… that helps you escape your mistake,
The thing, the something else that you can blame,
The thing in the bass amp!"

2011-10-24T17:45:00.003-04:00

There's nothing about Netflix's recent trouble that I don't enjoy: Qwikster-link. A little while back, halfway between the announcement of the spin-off of the D.V.D. rental business as Qwikster & the boom being lowered on that ill-conceived idea, I was engaged in a rather heated argument on this topic. My conversational partner was of the view that it was good to separate the streaming & D.V.D. options, & that Netflix's customers should quit their whining. I replied that I had no objection per se to the new billing plan, but that the public relations hadbeen bungled so terrifically as to taint the very idea of the plan; I also added that I thought spinning off the D.V.D. rentals into a whole different company, especially one with as awful a name as Qwikster (What year is this, 1999?), was a mistake that would terribly damage the Netflix brand. He reasserted that whatever Netflix did was fine & dandy & the subscribers should be glad the service existed at all. I know, I can't believe I was suckered into such a discussion, either, but at least it wasn't with anyone whose opinion I respect or value. I am also pleased that the management of Netflix have come around, to a degree, to my way of thinking. Qwikster? I scoff at "Qwikster."

This Week in Motorsport
This weekend saw the second live broadcast of a V8 Supercars race on Speed. The more I see of the V8 Supercars, the more I like, especially the live (complete) coverage, rather than the edited races usually presented. The argument here is similar to that made against the Entertainment & Sports Programming Network's canned coverage of the American Le Mans Series: seeing a race live, as it happens, is fun, but not as important as seeing a race in its entirety, from green flag to chequered flag. Seeing a race edited takes away much of the sense of the ebb & flow of the race that makes watching so interesting. An edited race is like a painfully long highlight package; I enjoy highlights as much as any other chap (& how I long for C.S.C. to be a real channel, with Sports Night as its flagship program), but they should be highlights, not the whole event with just enough of the liveliness ripped out of it to destroy the sporting value. I'll watch edited V8 Supercars races if that's all that's on offer, but it'll be hard to go back now that I've seen the vital, thriving sport live. (Can I go back to the farm now that I've seen gay Paris?)

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Cardigans, "Carnival" from Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery: Original Soundtrack (T.L.A.M.)

2011-10-23T18:24:00.008-04:00

The Explorers Club
№ CCLVIII - Lionel Crabb (1909-1956?), frogman extraordinaire, & the Crabb Affair.

Urbi et Orbi
Adjusting to the new Roman Missal, Third Edition is a curious experience. I support the new translations, meant to make the English more accurately reflect the Mass's original Latin—& thus the Mass's original intent—, viewing them as a tacit acknowledgement of what we all intuit, viz. that the Vatican II reforms went too far. The wrinkle is that the changes are to the parts of the Mass that every Catholic knows by rote, & overcoming decades of memorization is difficult. A complicating factor is that the last two Sundays' Masses have each involved a baptism, which takes the place of the Nicene Creed, depriving us of two more chances to practice the revised wording of the Creed. The most frequent change is the following common exchange:

Old version:
Priest: "The Lord be with you."
Parish: "And also with you."

New version:
Priest: "Th Lord be with you."
Parish: "And with your spirit."

My mother notes that "and with your spirit" seems to her much closer to the Latin of her youth, "et cum spiritu tuo," which is awesome, but that doesn't make the changeover any easier. It took the congregation three tries to get it right today at the end of Mass. Father Steve said, "The Lord be with you," & most of us—but not your humble narrator—replied, "And also with you." He paused & didn't correct us, but gave us a kindly look & said, "The Lord be with you." This time, a far larger number said, "And with your spirit," but a great many again said, "And also with you." Here Father Steve reminded us of the new wording & said again, "The Lord be with you." This time, "And with your spirit" rang out in the unanimity that is such a hallmark of the Mass. This is going to take some time to get right.

I can only imagine what it was like switching from the Latin to the vernacular in the mid-'60s after the Second Vatican Council. I would never have turned my back on the Holy See like those heretical bastards in the "Traditionalist Catholic" movement, but I would not have reacted well to the change. There would have been many dark mutterings under my breath, but I would have fallen in line in time; after all, who am I to oppose Holy Mother Church? (Hey, "Traditionalists," rejecting the ecclesiastical authority of His Holiness the Bishop of Rome is rather the operational definition of Protestant, so kindly stop calling yourselves "Catholic," because you aren't anything of the sort. Christians most assuredly, members of the catholic Church Militant, but not Catholics.)

The entirety of the latest issue of Faith magazine, published by the Diocese of Lansing, is devoted to the new Roman Missal; I hope to make the time to read what's been put on offer.

Atlanticism
The third… fourth… fifth… nth time's the charm! This time the governments of Europe will take the "decisive & effective" action needed finally to solve the rolling, roiling European debt crisis: euro-a-go-go-link. There is concern in Euroskeptic circles that this crisis will be seized upon as an opportunity to once again expand the E.U.'s transnational powers at the expense of the powers of the twenty-seven constituent E.U. member nation-states. I regard this concern as well-founded, while still disagreeing with the skeptics' premise of inveterate opposition to European integration. Liberal democracy is fun because finding & maintaining the proper balance is a constant struggle! Tyranny is easier, but vastly more unpleasant. But I digress. Let us hope the prime ministers & presidents & chancellors, & ministers of finance & Presidents of the E.U.'s byzantine institutions & chancellors of the exchequer, are able this time to restore confidence to the timorous markets, lest fear spread like wildfire & drag us into a repeat, small-scale or otherwise, of the Panic of '08. Cross your fingers & keep smiling.

Elsewhere in Europe (Switzerland being one of only two nations in Western, Central, & Northern Europe not to belong to the European Union, Norway being the other), the single-issue Swiss People's Party's (S.V.P.) share of the vote has fallen: Swiss-link. The S.V.P. remains the largest single party in the Parliament, & should retain both its seats on Switzerland's weird, consensus-driven Federal Council, but it's taken a step back after recent successes in referenda. While I wholeheartedly agree that the consent of the body politic* is the only legitimate basis for any polity, the Swiss ban on minaret construction—an appalling violation of what should be the universally inalienable right to freedom of worship—is a sobering illustration of the need to constrain the in-the-moment will of the mob within carefully considered constitutional limits. (I freely admit that my bias toward written, codified constitutions is influenced by my patriotism & reverence for the U.S. Constitution, but I maintain that this in no way discredits my arguments.) The S.V.P. is not evil, & it has every right to argue for radical change to Switzerland's immigration laws, but it would do well to be more conciliatory in its rhetoric & less single-minded in its program. Now, how do we go about getting the distasteful minaret-construction ban repealed?

*I attempt to avoid the words "the people," since so many tiny slices of the populace attempt to justify themselves as speaking for "the people." In my estimation, "body politic" encompasses all the people whilst sidestepping the minefield of "the people."

2011-10-23T10:17:00.004-04:00

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Aquabats!, "The Ballad of Mr. Bonkers!" from The Aquabats! vs. The Floating Eye of Death! and Other Amazing Adventures—Vol. 1 (Captain Thumbs-up)

Commentary: Mr. Bonkers is a pet scorpion with grandiose ambitions.

"No proboscis here!
It's Mr. Bonkers's year!
He's sick sick sick
With the bicycle kick,
You can't see his eyes from here!
Wo yeah yeah, wo yeah yeah,
Can you see him tonight?
Wo yeah yeah, wo yeah yeah,
Under the hot rock light?"

The Secret Base is now accepting nominations for our second annual, expanded R.B.D.S.O.T.D. celebration of the spookiest time of the year, Halloween. The series will begin on Tuesday. The more the merrier! Er, the more the scarier?

2011-10-22T12:34:00.008-04:00

Project GLOWWORM
Success!… & yet, trimming my beard remains far less emotionally satisfying than cutting my hair; whereas with my head hair I can see a clear difference from the word go, the results of beard trimming don't really reveal themselves 'til after I've showered & dried. The reveal doesn't have the same emotional heft. Nonetheless, the beast has been tamed & my beard appears once again as I wish it to appear.

Banzai!

The Queue
Saving the Queen is the worst book I've ever read. I will shoot myself in the head before ever reading another book authored by the odious William F. Buckley, Jr., fiction or non-fiction. If ever the opportunity arises, I will desecrate Buckley's grave.

Recently
John Buchan, The Thirty-nine Steps
Keith Jeffery, The Secret History of M.I.6: 1909-1949
William F. Buckley, Jr., Saving the Queen

Currently
Allen Dulles, The Craft of Intelligence

Presently
David Ignatius, Body of Lies
John le Carré, Call for the Dead
Joseph Newman, editor, Famous Soviet Spies: The Kremlin's Secret Weapon

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Aquabats!, "Captain Hampton and the Midget Pirates!" (live) courtesy of the YouTube (Nick Andopolis)

Commentary: Ahoy!-link, 7:19 seconds of live-in-concert awesomeness, brought to us by Nick Andopolis, my pal, a home-brewer, & the oft-shirtless drummer of The Loose Ties, whom I had the privilege of seeing live on stage last night. Let me also recommend for your aural-visual stimulation the following, also courtesy of the YouTube, combining "Captain Hampton and the Midget Pirates!" with the pirate-themed anime One Piece: pieces of eight-link. Ahoy!