Locate your local comic book purveyor. Sojourn to said purveyor's shop. Purchase Lobster Johnson: The Iron Prometheus No. 4. Read the issue; you'll be confused unless you've read Nos. 1-3, but entertained and possibly even intrigued. Examine closely the "Hellmail" page following the featured story. It will be worth your while.

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Here's an impossible question, Which is the superior British comedy director-actor duo, Ricky Gervais & Stephen Merchant (The Office and Extras) or Simon Pegg & Edgar Wright (Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz)? All this and Doctor Who? This is a damn good time to be an Anglophile.

Lousy Redcoats.

In a lovely confab with Codename: PANDORA, we were discussing her spectacles and she mentioned that she knows several people who wear spectacles with plain glass plates instead of lenses. They don't need corrective lenses, they're just a fashion statement. She took umbrage, and cited the wheelchair example: people think it is okay to wear eyeglasses even if they aren't required, but how would you look if you rolled around in a wheelchair because of simple sloth? The very next day, I trekked to good ol' McFarlen Library to reserve a copy of Beowulf, the contemporary Seamus Heaney translation. (I have not seen the animated film Beowulf, but I hear it is a travesty, yet one more reason to hate Neil Gaiman.) Leaving, I was proceeded through the exit by a gentleman in a wheelchair, zipping along with great celerity toward his car. What are the odds, the very day after The Sardine's delightful rant? How often do I find myself pondering wheelchairs? I'll have to maneuver her into conversing about mermaids and then spend the next day skulking about the vicinity of Thread Creek. A long shot, but you never know.

Baseball Sucks
This Mitchell Report brouhaha is my favorite baseball story since the strike. Bog, how I enjoyed the strike. In conclusion, baseball sucks.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Bob & Doug McKenzie, "Twelve Days of Christmas" from Great White North (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Take off, you hosers.