Prelude to Project PANDORA
My apologies to all and sundry for much ado about nothing. The Most Dangerous Game has a beau, newly acquired this very weekend. She accompanied the lad to a wedding in July, as friends, at his invitation, but reason suggests something other than friendship was already in the works; by the same token, 'tis all but certain that my overtures would not have been received favorably. But dash it all and curse my lazy bones, I wish I had acted! Down in flames though I would have gone, at least then I would have known decisively, I would have had that specific interaction to study for the future, for the proper commencement of Project PANDORA. Temerity should have been my guiding principle! All that's left to me now is the cold comfort of speculation and probabilities. "Blast," he hissed, clenching a fist.

Please, spare no worry on my account. (I'm appalled by the arrogance of that sentence, as if you'd waste your worry on such a triviality.) 'Twas not my intention in the previous "Prelude to Project PANDORA" post to suggest that I was preparing to abandon the pursuit of The Most Dangerous Game, but looking back I perceive how easily the following might have been misconstrued to mean just that: "Well, if she thinks she's calling the shots she's sorely mistaken. I'll walk away from this in thirty seconds flat and never look back." To really understand those sentences, I suppose you'd have to be acquainted with the context in which they were written, the entire I.M. chat between Skeeter and me, but in light of recent events there doesn't seem to be much point in delving into that line of discussion. "Thirty seconds" before I walk away and never look back.

Question the first: Do I have any continuing romantic designs on The Most Dangerous Game? There is a tremendous moral hazard in stealing another fellow's girl. The hazard isn't found in the stealing itself; this guy isn't a friend of mine, I don't know him from Adam, and I'd be sundering a mere boyfriend-girlfriend coupling, not anything substantial and important like a marriage. (I hold with Dan Rydell's refusal to interfere in another man's marriage, even if that man is a tool.) But such an enterprise would be inherently underhanded, and would almost certainty become a nasty, convoluted business. I'm as wretched a sinner as the next chap, but would I be willing to embark upon so underhanded an undertaking, one so fraught with moral compromises? Even if I liked the chances of success, I don't think I'd have the stomach for what might be required.

Question the second: Do I wish to continue being her pal? My instincts were not entirely wrong, The Most Dangerous Game certainly likes me. Not, alas, as the apple of her eye, but as a pal, my old familiar role of the eunuch, the asexual friend. The easiest thing to do would be nothing, to continue on as before and pretend we were always the pals she thought we were and never the paramours I hoped we'd become. Yet I find this inaction somehow repulsive. If we are to be friends, I must be frank with her and apprise her of my erstwhile intentions, even if that itself creates an awkwardness from which our association never recovers. Or, I can desist from all contact with her, never breathing a word about the cause even if this paints me as a bastard. I refuse to take the easy way, even though it seems most in accord with social norms. This time, personal probity must trump strict propriety.

I know the two alternate answered to the second question, but I cannot yet choose one over the other, not with any conviction. Regardless, the first question is answered a very affirmative negative; the romantic pursuit of The Most Dangerous Game, the third Jessica, is at an end. I've walked away from the prospect of she and me as "us" (not entirely of my own choice, mind you, stark reality played its ugly part) and I'll never look back. I'll never look back? Right, sure, never. I'm too much Epimetheus not to look back. But I will try not to look back too often nor for too long.

Every ending I devised was horrible claptrap. So, instead of ending I'll just stop.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Proclaimers, "The One Who Loves You Now" from Restless Soul (T.L.A.M.)