Golem, "Citizen Boris" from Citizen Boris (T.L.A.M.)
Commentary: The verses of "Citizen Boris" consist of a call-and-answer Q. & A., the answers to which you may or may not remember from your social studies classes. If you don't know the answers to these questions, please don't exercise your right to vote. For the health of our body politic, an ignorant voter is worse than a non-voter.
"Boris Hoffman, you are now a citizen of the United States, so help you God.
"What is the Fourth of July?
Independence Day.
What is the legislative branch of our government?
Congress.
What is the Bill of Rights?
First ten amendments of the Constitution.
Can you name the forty-ninth state in the Union?
Alaska…
"How many representatives in Congress?
Four hundred thirty-five.
What is the capital of your state?
It depends on where you live.
Ho wrote 'The Star-Spangled Banner'?
Francis Scott Key.
For how long do we elect a president?
Four years…
"Who said, 'Give me liberty or give me death'?
Patrick Henry.
Who elects the Congress?
The people.
What is the duty of the Supreme Court?
To interpret the laws.
Can you name the original Thirteen States?
Connecticut,
New York, Virginia, Massachusetts, Pennsylvania,
Rhode Island, New Hampshire,
Maryland, Delaware,
North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia,
And, um, oh—oh! New Jersey!…
"And I pledge allegiance
To my new land, America!
Good-bye, my old passport,
I now renounce you…"
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