Saturday, March 31, 2012

Project OSPREY
(№ 2) Kansas 64-62 Ohio State (№ 2)
N.C.A.A. Final Four

(№ 1) Kentucky 69-61 Louisville (№ 4)
N.C.A.A. Final Four

Well, poo. On the other hand, I cannot deny experiencing a certain thrill as I watched the hated Buckeyes flail about, impotent to halt the Self-made men's onslaught. I do so love watching any team representing the Scarlet & Gray lose, all but regardless of the circumstances. I'm not alone in thinking Kentucky is going to chase Kansas right out of the building, yes? A shame, that, especially since it is inevitable that Kentucky will later have to vacate the win, just as UMass & Memphis had to vacate wins from John Calipari's tenures as head coach at those institutions. Sure, sure, he's never been implicated in any of the UMass or Memphis shenanigans, it is simple coincidence that every school for which he coaches later runs significantly afoul of the N.C.A.A. rulebook. In the immortal words of Ian Fleming, "Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. The third time it's enemy action." I'll never understand why Kentucky sold their souls for the surety that they'd be the proof of the fiend Calipari's "enemy action," the fools.

Closer to home, the blog U.M. Hoops has taken a pair of interesting looks back at the season that was for the valiant Wolverines: highlights & lowlights. Ah well, there's always next year.

Go Blue!

This Week in Motorsport
Formula Fun!
I've not yet had the time to watch last weekend's Malaysian Grand Prix. Curses!

By Endurance We Conquer
Bored with the first half of the Kentucky-Louisville game, I wandered through the channels to Speed, where I caught the last minutes of the Porsche 250, the second race of the year for the Rolex Sports Car Series. The Daytona Prototypes still look bulbous & awkward compared to proper Le Mans Prototypes, but aesthetic changes made since last year have made them look considerably more racy. As long as the American Le Mans Series remains unpalatable, mayhap I should invest more time & attention into the Rolex Series. It's not A.C.O.-sanctioned, but it is endurance racing.
Project OSPREY
Thursday, 29 March
(№ 3) Stanford 75-51 Minnesota (№ 6)
N.I.T. Final

I didn't see Thursday's night finale to the 75th National Invitation Tournament because I was at the aforementioned History Club game night playing Risk, but my father described the on-court proceedings as being as ugly as the final score. The luckless Golden Gophers "had no answer" for the suffocating defense of the epithetless Cardinal(s). 'Tis a shame, both because the Big Ten team did not triumph & because the loss came at the hands of the ancient foe, the Pac-12. Still, it must be noted that Minnesota was far from a top-tier Big Ten team, & I remain confident that in any apples-to-apples comparison of the Big Ten's best against the Pac-12's best, the pride of the Midwest would send those not-as-coastal-as-they-used-to-be West Coast bastards packing. Nevertheless, drat!

Much as it pains me to root for the hated Buckeyes (№ 2), here's hoping that, win or loss, they acquit themselves well in tonight's "Final Four" showdown with the epitheless Jayhawks of Kansas (№ 2), for their play will leave the season's final impression of the whole Big Ten. N.P.R. doesn't often cover sports, & this week has been a painful reminder why that's a good thing: the coverage of the second-to-last round of the N.C.A.A. Men's Basketball Tournament (Division I) has focused almost exclusively on the in-state rivalry 'twixt (№ 4) Louisville & (№ 1) Kentucky, with only passing mentions of Kansas & THE (Ohio State University). The Final Four belongs to everyone, you snooty poseurs, not just the Commonwealth of Kentucky!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Barenaked Ladies, "Maybe Katie" from Everything to Everyone (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"What's the use in hesitating?
Can't you see that Katie's waiting?
Just because her youth is fading
Doesn't mean she's not worth dating."

Friday, March 30, 2012

Project GLOWWORM
A persistent but low level question about my whiskers, specifically my moustache, was if it would interfere with making out, since I'd not kissed a girl since initiating first the Banzai Beard Bonanza II: Bonsai's Revenge & then the whiskers of permanence for the foreseeable future. There didn't seem to be any problems tonight, at least none caused by the whiskers. Too soon to say if the moustache is, as 'tis hoped, a signal of virility, but at least now I know its not a hindrance. Onward & upward!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Aquabats!, "Stuck In a Movie!" from Charge!! Special One Year Anniversary Edition (Captain Thumbs-up)

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Operation AXIOM
One hundred years ago to the day (probably), 29 March 1912, Robert Falcon Scott perished, the last of his five-man party of polar explorers to succumb to malnutrition, exhaustion, & the killing cold. Scott & his men were beaten in the race to be first to the South Pole by Roald Amundsen's Norwegian party; whereas Amundsen & his men all lived, Scott lead his men to their doom. Heated debate continues to this day over whether "Scott of the Antarctic" was a hero or a villain, a victim of misfortune & the harsh Antarctic conditions or a murderously incompetent fool who lead good men to a bad end. I've not yet read any of the books on the subject & so shall withhold any direct comment on Scott's culpability. I will say, however, that my idol, of all those who participated in the Heroic Age of Antarctic Exploration, is Sir Ernest Shackleton (1874-1922), in no small part because despite the travails of his ill-fated Imperial Trans-Antarctic Expedition—being shipwrecked in the ice, marching across vast expanses of sea ice, & braving the frigid Antarctic waters in open boats—Shackleton brought every single one of his men home alive. Requiescat in pace to Captain Scott, Doctor Edward Adrian Wilson, Lieutenant Henry Bowers, Captain Lawrence Oates, & Petty Officer Edgar Evans.

Project MERCATOR
I played Risk this evening with my fellows from the History Club. Five individuals on four teams, three lads playing solo & two lasses playing in tandem. Mr. Red quickly established himself Down Under & put the Australian Gambit into effect; Mr. Blue drove the lasses & me out of South America & initiated Pinochle with Pinochet; the Mademoiselles Green began an Asian Simmer; & I was soon utilizing Out of Africa, with a strong defensive foothold in Europe.

Mr. Blue made a few tentative moves toward the suicidal European Hurry Up & Wait, but I responded in force & used my silver tongue to explain that Europe was too rich a prize for me to allow him to hold it uncontested; so, if he persisted in trying to seize that prize I'd be forced to stop him & we'd be locked in a death struggle while Mr. Red cultivated the Australian Gambit to our eventual doom. Mr. Blue also made a few moves toward pursuing the North American Dream, but I had a large enough contingent there to spook him; he was afraid that if he went too much on the offensive that I'm swing down into Central America & take away his continental bonus. Silly Mr. Blue, he'd have helped himself a great deal if he'd just launched an all-out assault on my fairly weak North American garrison. Mr. Red also began pursuing the North American Dream, & they went tit-for-tat, neither ever attacking except "for card." I don't feel bad about shaking on the Brazil-North Africa Non-Aggression Pact with the hapless Mr. Blue, since it was his idea. Meanwhile, I used Out of Africa to expand not northward into Europe but eastward into Asia, & the Black Raj was soon extant; I have had my most consistent success at Risk pairing Out of Africa with the Black Raj. Knowing that the Australian Gambit is the long game & Mr. Red would only grow stronger, as soon as I had the right slot in the turning-in-cards rotation I attacked Indonesia from Siam-I-Am; the rolls were with me, leaving more of my forces intact that I'd dare hope, but even with bad rolls I'd have had the numbers to make the Australian Gambit mine instead of his.

All this time, the Mademoiselles Green were simmering away in Asia, playing without an apparent strategy but accumulating cards & amassing a large, sedentary army in Kamchatka. In his pursuit of the North American Dream, focused on Mr. Blue's similar dreaming, Mr. Red had left his rear exposed & vulnerable. Once I had blasted through the large red army in Indonesia & seized the continental bonus, Mr. Red looked irrecoverably vulnerable; it took only a little persuasion before the Greens were spurred into action, wiping out Mr. Red & seizing his cards. Turning in three sets of cards simultaneously mid-turn, the Mademoiselles Green were very uncertain what to do with their new, preposterously large, poorly deployed army. They launched assaults against Mr. Blue's Asian Simmer & made his Pinochle with Pinochet their own, but their offensive fizzled before it encroached on my empire. I marshaled my forces & finished off a demoralized Mr. Blue, claiming his cards. They'd been plainly evincing fatigue; so, on the cusp of turning in cards mid-turn to launch a campaign of annihilation to win me the world entire, I proposed that we call it a game & resign ourselves to a cold war 'twixt green & black. This proposal was greeted with enthusiasm & the game night (we'd first played Apples to Apples) drew to a close.

The doctrine of "Who Dares Wins" & my calm throughout the proceedings had won me a clear psychological advantage over the Mademoiselles Green, who seemed confident that they could not defeat my global Black Raj, even though they had massive armies placed haphazardly around the globe—so haphazardly as to comprise a halfway defensive alignment: the "snake" to annihilate them would have had to have been a many-headed hydra, a proposition that poses challenges & great peril to the attacker. I was aided earlier in the game by Mr. Blue's timidity, a chillingly accurate reflection of the sorry way I used to play (&, like clockwork, lose) before I instituted "Who Dares Wins." These advantages were not mine by random chance, though, but the calculated products of my comportment throughout. Sweet fancy Moses, I love playing Risk!

Autobahn
At one point of my drive this afternoon Lumi the Snow Queen was behind an Oldsmobile Silhouette minivan. I glanced in the rear-view mirror & saw the vehicle behind was also an Oldsmobile Silhouette minivan. It's sad to think that it has been eight years since the demise of Oldsmobile, sad because such an idiosyncratic marque is gone, & because with the bankruptcies & bailouts of General Motors & Chrysler & the demise of other marques such as Pontiac, Saturn, Hummer, Saab, & Mercury Oldsmobile seems to have gone gentle into that good night unnoticed & unmourned. I have a T-shirt, purchased from the R. E. Olds Transportation Museum in Lansing, with the following emblazoned across the chest: "Before Chevy, before Dodge, even before Ford, there was Oldsmobile. Established August 21, 1897." The station wagon in which my siblings & I were ferried as wee bairns, before we in our childish idiocy advocated for our parents to adopt that weird status symbol of late 1980s suburbia, the minivan, was an Oldsmobile Custom Cruiser.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Association, "Windy" from the Rhino Hi-Five: The Association E.P. (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Yes, an argument could be made that the R.B.D.S.O.T.D. should have been "In My Merry Oldsmobile," but "Windy" was already stuck in my head before Lumi the Snow Queen became the meat in-between two pieces of Silhouette sandwich bread.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Project OSPREY
(№ 6) Minnesota 68-67 Washington (№ 1) (O.T.)
N.I.T. semifinals

My congratulations to the luckless Golden Gophers on advancing to the N.I.T. final, & my thanks to those selfsame Golden Gophers for proving that the Pac-12 champion is barely equal to a bottom-of-the-heap Big Ten team. To claim the N.I.T. crown on Thursday Minnesota will have to defeat one more of the Big Ten's ancient foes, (№ 3) Stanford. Go get 'em, Gophers!

The Savage Wars of Peace
We open with a pair of B.B.C. articles related to the Syrian Arab Republic, the first concerning former U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan's peace mission: optimism-link. The second concerns U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's shockingly prudent response: pessimism-link. Given the Obama Administration's naïveté regarding the Russian Federation & the Islamic Republic of Iran & frequent kowtowing to the wishes of the People's Republic of China, Secretary's Clinton's attitude toward Syria's Ba'athist government is both refreshing & most welcome. Events on the ground in that benighted country continue to affirm Mrs. Clinton's attitude even as they negate Mr. Annan's: fatalism-link.

Elsewhere, good news in the continuing African Union-Kenyan-Ethiopian fight against al-Qaeda's franchise in Somalia, al-Shabaab: retreat-link. Lawlessness anywhere is a threat to law everywhere; the world, especially the West, dare not again turn its back on Somalia 'til their is a state in place that can defend its sovereignty against the depredations of pirates & jihadis.

The Stars My Destination
The robotic "space lorry" Edoardo Amaldi has docked with the International Space Station (I.S.S.): autopilot-link. The A.T.V.s are as yet unmanned, but they still afford the E.S.A. a greater capacity to lift cargo & experiments into orbit that far outstrips anything at N.A.S.A.'s disposal; is the loss of America's lead in manned spaceflight really the changed you believed in in '08? I know I harp on this subject quite a bit, but that's only because it is so galling & appalling that the United States of America has is less capable of conducting independent spaceflight operations that the Russians, the Chinese, & even the Europeans, who have never managed to put a man in orbit by themselves. (Nonetheless, they currently have a launch capability greater than anything in N.A.S.A.'s fleet.) The shame is nigh unbearable.

The Edoardo Amaldi is unmanned, true, but there is a full crew on the I.S.S., making this a "The Stars My Destination" post, not a "Science!" post.

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Robbie Williams featuring Jon Lovitz, "Well, Did You Evah!" from Swing When You're Winning (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "That's a lovely dress. Do ya think I could talk her out of it?"

Dienstag, 27 März
Less Than Jake, "Robots One, Humans Zero" from B is for B-Sides (T.L.A.M.)

Monday, March 26, 2012

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXX - The life & trek of Kazimierz Nowak (1897-1937).







Science!
I no longer have any interest in James Cameron's feature films, but that doesn't mean I disdain his spirit of exploration. My congratulations to only the third challenger of the Challenger Deep: The Abyss-link.

For more on the Mariana Trench & the Challenger Deep, please see:
"The Explorers' Club" № CCLXXI
"The Explorers' Club" № CCLXXII

Science!

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Queen, "We Are the Champions" from Greatest Hits I (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "And we'll keep on fighting 'til the end", possibly the song's most underappreciated lyric. Even victors need continue striving.

Sonntag, 25 März
Robbie Williams featuring Rupert Everett, "They Can't Take That Away From Me" from Swing When You're Winning (The M.A.P.)

Samstag, 24 März
"Weird Al" Yankovic, "Close But No Cigar" from Straight Outta Lynnwood (Ska Army)

Commentary:

"I said, 'Hey, are we playing horseshoes, honey?'
No, I don't think we are…

I said, 'Hey, are we lobbing hand grenades, kiddo?'
No, I don't think we are…

I said, 'Hey, are we doin' government work here?'
No, I don't think we are…"

Friday, March 23, 2012

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Crash and the Boys, "I Am Sad, So Very, Very Sad" from Scott Pilgrim vs. the World: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I do love that the title of "I Am Sad, So Very, Very Sad" is more verbose that the song itself, the entire lyrics being the words "So sad!" Not "So sad!" in endless repetition, just a single declaration, "So Sad!" Thus concludes our week of lamentation for the ignominious end of the valiant Wolverines' (men's basketball edition) Big Ten Co-championship season. We cling to the sustaining belief of all sports fans: there's always next year. Go Blue!

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Science!
As is so common in these days of exoplanetary discovery & new instruments with which to probe the mysteries of the heavens, it appears that our assumptions about the structure & nature of Mercury, the planet closest to the Accursed Sun, might have been rubbish: iron core-link & icy shadows-link. Of course, upon reflection our assumptions about what constituted a "normal" solar system—rocky planets closer to the star with gas giants farther out—was based on a sample size of one, which is an insufficient basis for making broader generalizations. Also, what we see about Mercury's inner structure might be unprecedented, but we must also consider that our precedents are all set by just a few planets: Venus, the Earth, Mars, & perhaps Pluto. I say the following not with disdain but with enthusiasm: we don't know jack! "There's so much to learn!"

Science!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Starting Line, "Saddest Girl Story" from Say It Like You Mean It (T.L.A.M.)

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Vote for Kodos | Project PANDORA
I've a wee crush on an ultraconservative girl. Ultraconservative, you ask? The girl adores Senator Santorum. The only thing I can say in my defense is that my infatuation is mostly physical; she's a dancer!

Project OSPREY
(№ 6) Minnesota 78-72 Middle Tennessee (№ 4)

In N.I.T. action, the luckless Golden Gophers outlasted the epithetless Blue Raiders to advance to the semifinals (equivalent to the "Final Four" in the N.C.A.A. Tournament). Rarely have I seen so persistently & effectively interdict in-bounds passes as did Middle Tennessee, but it was too little, too late, & Minnesota demonstrated that a team that makes the most of its free throw opportunities has a distinct advantage both down the stretch & in the clutch. My congratulations to Coach "Tubby" Smith & his luckless Golden Gophers. Let's go, Big Ten!

This Week in Motorsport
Beyond Thunderdome
The first pair of V8 Supercars races reminded me of what attracted my attention throughout 2011: V8 Supercars is an exuberant form of motorsport. Mayhap I'm reading too much into the Aussie bravado, but there is about the enterprise a palpable joy & a devil-may-care dedication to fun. The commentators neglect to identify themselves; so, I can't tell you one from another, but I enjoy the caliber & tenor of their commentary, delivered in those preposterous, delightful Australian accents. I've watched enough of the races now to be familiar with some of the competitors, & to have a general sense of their rising or falling fortunes. My "in" to the competitive side of the sport is that I was raised in a General Motors (G.M.) family in a General Motors town, making it only natural to root for the Holden Commodores (Holden being G.M. of Australasia) as they oppose the Ford Falcons. I hate that blue oval, hate it no matter the continent or the context.

Yes, the races are edited, & broadcast on Speed days or weeks after the races are run Down Under, but the quality & deftness of the editing & packaging serves not to siphon the fun & sport out of the races, but to underscore the feebleness of the Entertainment Sports & Programming Network's butchering of the American Le Mans Series's (A.L.M.S.) races. Say "G'day" to the V8 Supercars!

By Endurance We Conquer
The 12 Hours of Sebring was run on Saturday last, beginning both the inaugural F.I.A. World Endurance Championship (W.E.C.) & this year's A.L.M.S. Audi finished first & second overall & in the L.M.P. 1 category (Le Mans Prototype 1), with the third Audi entrant much further down the order but still having classified as having covered the race distance, meaning it must have spent some time in the pits with mechanical troubles. Corvette finished second & fourth in the G.T.E.-Pro. class (Grand Tourer Endurance-Professional), behind a B.M.W. & above & behind a Ferrari. Here's hope to gain a greater sense of how it all went down through this weekend's Mobil 1 The Grid, an invaluable source of motorsport news & highlights. Motorsport that you don't see just isn't the same; curse the A.L.M.S. for selling its soul to the E.S.P.N.!

Audi are again campaigning with the turbo-Diesel-powered R18, which first competed last year. With the surprise exit of the turbo-Diesel-powered Peugeot 908 from the W.E.C., the R18's most serious competition is expected to be the brand-new petrol/electric-hybrid Toyota TS030, which won't be unveiled 'til the six-hour/1,000-kilometer race at mighty Spa-Francorchamps in May. Here's hoping that the Toyota will be able to give Audi a run for their money, to keep the sport competitive 'til Porsche arrives in L.M.P. 1 in 2014.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Sam Cooke, "Sad Mood" from Portrait of a Legend, 1951-1964 (T.L.A.M.)

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Science!
Indiana Jones meets Star Wars: archæology-link. Further proof that everything is better with the word "space." (Space pope, space bees... space archæology!)

Science!

Autobahn
This afternoon, I spied a Chevrolet Cruze sporting the vanity plate CRUZE. I'm yet undecided if that's appealingly clever or appallingly dumb.

In unambiguously appealing news, I spied, in the Brutalist concrete structure where I customarily park Lumi the Snow Queen to shade her interior from the death rays of the Accursed Sun, a Fiat 2000 Spider, resplendent in rosso corsa, Italian racing red. The top was down, revealing an easily accessible fire extinguisher & four-point harnesses that lead me to surmise the Spider is a track-day racer, or at least that the owner has pretensions in that direction. The sleek lines & ridiculously low stance of the Spider were rare sights in a muscle-car Mecca like the Vehicle City, & the badges with the script "Pininfarina" added a touch of continental class to these provincial environs. There are a pair of modern Fiat 500s often to be seen in the parking structure, both in unimaginative shades of gray, but after today I'd say the 2000 Spider is the only real Italian automobile I've seen in there. The Spider's vanity plate read FIATALY (an awkward portmonteau, I suppose, of "Fiat" & "Italy").

Another bloke was looking at the 2000 Spider as I approached & took my gander, neither of us sure exactly what we were seeing. (I did not know that what I saw was a 2000 Spider, a Pininfarina-manufactured continuation of the Fiat-produced 124 Sport Spider, until I could consult ye olde interweb, specifically the Wikipedia.) We agreed that neither of us had seen the Spider's like there on campus, though he said there was a sweet Dodge Challenger to be seen on the lowest level & I told him of the Triumph TR6 I've seen tooling around Grand Blanc & an M.G. I've seen parked at my church. He said that the only Triumphs he'd ever heard of were motorcycle, which lead to an unfortunate digression into two-wheeled territory, where my interest does not lie. But we parted on amiable terms after introducing ourselves (his name's Andy) & the sighting of the Fiat was made more enjoyable by the sharing of the experience with the fellow.

This Week in Motorsport
Formula Fun!
The 2012 F.I.A. Formula One World Championships got off to a rip-roaring start with the Australian Grand Prix at the Albert Park Street Circuit in Melbourne, Victoria. The race began with a distinct difference from 2011: Neither of the two Red Bull (Renault-powered) cars started from the from row. Reigning double World Champion Sebastian Vettel ('10 & '11) & grizzled Aussie veteran Mark Webber started sixth & fifth, the first time no Red Bull had been in the top four starting positions in over twenty grands prix. Once the race began, though, it became clear that things were not so different this year after all. The McLarens (Mercedes) of '09 World Champion Jenson Button & '08 World Champion Lewis Hamilton started from the front row & set the early pace. There was much talk in qualifying & before the race of those Kraut bastards at the Mercedes factory team having finally taken that big step from being the fastest of the midfield teams to being truly able to compete with Red Bull, McLaren, & Ferrari; seven-time World Champion Michael Schumacher ('94, '95, 2000, '01, '02, '03, & '04) started fourth, his highest grid position since he came out of retirement for the 2010 season. Once the race began, however, Schumacher's Mercedes was a rolling chicane, a roadblock in front of the Vettel's Red Bull; once the younger German was able to make the pass, his streaked into the distance. Schumacher soon inflicted fatal mechanical damage to his machine & had to retire from the grand prix. Slightly farther back in the running order, the second Mercedes of Nico Rosberg held up Webber & the Ferrari of double World Champion Fernando Alonso ('05 & '06), 'til they were each able to pass & leave the "Silver Arrow" Mercedes far, far behind. Vettel was able to leapfrog Hamilton on the pit stop rotation & made up ground on Button, but didn't quite have an answer to the McLaren's speed. The top five finishers were the top five contenders for the '10 & '11 World Drivers' Championships: Button, Vettel, Hamilton, Webber, & Alonso. F1 is back! Hooray! The next round of the championship will be the Malaysian Grand Prix, coming up this very weekend.

The Lotus Eaters & Farewell to the Virgins: The twelve teams competing in 2012 are the same twelve teams as in each of the last two seasons (several dropped out & several entered the sport 'twixt '09 & '10), though three of them now have different names. The former Renault factory team is no longer majority owned by Renault, & last year called itself Lotus Renault; this year, after settling the dispute with the former Team Lotus, the former Renault team are Lotus (still using Renault power). The brand-new team that entered F1 as Lotus Racing in '10 & became Team Lotus in '11, have relinquished the Lotus name & Chapman heritage & are contesting the '12 campaign as Caterham (Renault). (A further twist is that Caterham is an English sports car manufacturer whose principal product is the Caterham 7, based on Lotus founder Colin Chapman's old Lotus Seven; the Caterham 7 is far closer to Chapman's Lotuses than anything currently manufactured by Lotus Cars, the title sponsor of the former Renault team/current Lotus.) In far less confusing news, the hapless Virgin squad are now called Marussia (Cosworth), title sponsorship having changed from Sir Richard Branson's sprawling Virgin empire to the Russian sports car manufacturer Marussia.

The Pilots: Red Bull (Vettel & Webber), McLaren (Button & Hamilton), Ferrari (Alonso & Felipe Massa), Mercedes (Rosberg & Schumacher), & Sauber (Ferrari) (Kamui Kobayashi & Sergio Pérez) return the same driver lineups as in 2011.

At Force India (Mercedes), Adrian Sutil has been replaced by Nico Hülkenberg (who was a rookie with Williams in 2010), paired with the returning Paul di Resta. At Williams (switched to Renault from Cosworth), Rubens Barrichello has been replaced by Bruno Senna, paired with the returning Pastor Maldonado. At Caterham (last year's Team Lotus), Jarno Trulli has been replaced by Vitaly Petrov, paired with the returning Heikki Kovalainen. At Marussia, Jérôme d'Ambrosio has been replaced by rookie Charles Pic, paired with the returning Timo Glock. At Hispania (Cosworth), Vitantonio Liuzzi has been replaced by Pedro de la Rosa, paired with the returning Narain Karthikeyan (who gave up his seat for half of last year when Red Bull paid Hispania to get then-rookie Daniel Ricciardo some F1 experience).

At Lotus (last year's Lotus Renault), Petrov & Senna have been replaced by '07 World Champion Kimi Räikkönen (returning to F1 after two fruitless reasons in the W.R.C.) & Romain Grosjean (the reigning G.P.2 champion, who was a rookie with Renault in '09 & had been out of F1 since). At Toro Rosso (Ferrari), the Red Bull "B team," Sébastien Buemi & Jaime Alguersuari have been replaced by Ricciardo (who drove for Hispania on loan from Red Bull last year) & rookie Jean-Éric Vergne.

Last year there were no French drivers in Formula One; this year there are trois: the returning (& now much more seasoned) Grosjean & the rookies Vergne & Pic. Oui! Oui! Also, this year there are six World Drivers' Champions on the grid, the most ever to race in a single F1 season, fully one-quarter of the drivers in any given race. In chronological order (& team with which championship[s] was [were] won): Schumacher (Benetton, Ferrari), Alonso (Renault), Räikkönen (Ferrari), Hamilton (McLaren), Button (Brawn), & Vettel (Red Bull).

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
MxPx, "Sad Sad Song" from Secret Weapon (T.L.A.M.)

Monday, March 19, 2012

Project OSPREY
For those amongst you who just didn't get enough college basketball over the first four (or six) days of the N.C.A.A. Tournament, might I recommend the nation's first collegiate basketball championship, the National Invitation Tournament (N.I.T.)? This is the seventy-fifth year of the N.I.T., dating all the way back to 1938. Neat! I glimpsed a bracket that informed me Washington & Oregon had advanced at the expense of Northwestern & Iowa. I hate for any member of the Big Ten, the first intercollegiate athletic conference, to lose to the ancient foe, in any sport, but it is nice to know that the very best of the Pac-12 are worthy to play only the dregs of the Big Ten. The Madness is multifaceted.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Barenaked Ladies, "The New Sad" from Barenaked Ladies Are Men (T.L.A.M.)

Sunday, March 18, 2012

For the first time since Christmas Day, "The Explorers' Club" is on schedule. Huzzah!

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXIX - The life & times of Joseph Thomson (1858-1895), whose exploits were the direct inspiration for the novel King Solomon's Mines.







Bonus: Thomson's gazelle, namesake of the explorer.



I adore Thomson's motto, "He who goes gently, goes safely; he who goes safely, goes far."

Project OSPREY
The ill-starred Boilermakers' loss to the epithetless Jayhawks of Kansas was unfortunate—heartbreaking for my father, a Purdue University alumnus. Still, four Big Ten teams advanced to the Sweet Sixteen, fully a quarter of the participants. I suppose there is some very, very slight consolation for we fans of the valiant Wolverines in Ohio University's advancing to the Sweet Sixteen; we lost to a credible tournament team, not one-hit wonders punching above their weight for a single game. I suppose there's some consolation in that, though I don't feel at all consoled. Drat! Drat! A thousand times, drat!
Lies, Damned Lies, & the News
There's good news & there's bad news. The bad news is that I would have lost my $10,000 bet to Mitt Romney because of the good news: All of this weekend's This American Life is dedicated to clearing up the lies they broadcast about Apple, Foxconn, & production in the People's Republic of China in a much-heralded episode aired in January. (Fortunately, my best with Governor Romney was hypothetical, & I shan't be compelled to enter indentured servitude to work off the debt.) Ira Glass was forthright & earnest, saying that he & his staff had "screwed up" in not adequately fact-checking the story before putting it on air. Glass was endlessly frustrated with the ne'er-do-well actor-cum-reporter who had perpetrated the deception, refusing the accept the scoundrel's self-serving, absurd justification that his lies were true "in the theatrical sense." There's no way to put this that doesn't sound ridiculously self-important, so I'll just eat that accusation: I was satisfied. It would have been useful for the audience to be given a greater understanding of the factors that lead to the screw up. What were the factors that lead Glass & co. to accept a terminally-flawed fact-checking process? Was there an eagerness to believe the worst about a large American corporation & did this lead to the subordination of standard journalistic practice? It would have been useful for this sort of soul-searching to have been presented to the audience, but of far greater importance is that this searing introspection take place, even if only behind the scenes of This American Life.

As is always the case when a reporting organization owns up to its mistakes, far more ears heard the lie than will hear the correction. The damage has been done, & no matter what mighty efforts Glass or others undertake there is a percentage of the populous, either through gullibility or malice, who will continue to believe the lies that This American Life originally proudly proclaimed as truths. My intention is not to pile on, not to castigate Ira Glass & his staff, but to remind one & all of the terrible responsibility borne by those who enter the public sphere as reporters, our culture's tribunes, & the dreadful consequences that result when those tribunes manifestly fail to act responsibly.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
No Doubt, "Sad For Me" from No Doubt (T.L.A.M.)

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Operation AXIOM
Today is the feast day of Saint Patrick, one of the three patron saints of Ireland. In my beloved United States & in other places around the world, a great many persons, many of them non-Catholic & even more of them religious in the only most lukewarm sense, will observe this occasion as "St. Paddy's Day," an orgy of drunkenness, cultural mockery, & the crassest consumerism. The question that confronts us on this dark day is this: Is my long-standing, vociferous hatred of St. Paddy's Day more righteous now that I've been to Ireland, now that I've spent a week visiting Dublin & perusing many of her public houses?

The Queue
The Goon is a tremendous series, but I cannot escape the conclusion that fame ruined it to a degree. Eric Powell, The Goon's creator, writer, & artist, has won multiple Eisner Awards, possibly the comic-book industry's most prestigious award for creativity (compare to the Oscars for cinema or the Emmys for television). These awards are well-deserved & I am glad Powell's achievement has been recognized. But, corresponding roughly with the awarding of Powell's first Eisner & the increased attention paid to the series, something changed: The Goon gained a new & not unwelcome emotional heft, & lost much of the zaniness that was so great a part of its charm. The early Goon stories are a madcap delight; the later Goon stories aren't completely joyless, they're just mostly joyless. Mayhap it is unfair to blame this on the fame that accompanied the Eisner Award wins; it could be genuine coincidence that The Goon changed creative direction at roughly the same time. Back to more respected (which is not the same thing as respectable) fare.

Recently
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Steve Martin, Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life
Eric Powell, The Goon: Wicked Inclinations (Vol. 5), Chinatown and the Mystery of Mr. Wicker (Vol. 6), A Place of Heartache and Grief (Vol. 7), Those That is Damned (Vol. 8), Calamity of Conscience (Vol. 9), & Death's Greedy Comeuppance (Vol. 10)

Currently
Victor Davis Hanson, A War Like No Other: How the Athenians and Spartans Fought the Peloponnesian War

Presently
Steve Martin, An Object of Beauty
Rudyard Kipling, The Man who would be King and Other Stories
Edgar Rice Burroughs, The Gods of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
They Might Be Giants, "Why Must I Be Sad?" from John Henry (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Welcome to a week-long series of songs of lamentation. I'm sad not because the valiant Wolverines were ejected from the N.C.A.A. Tournament, but because of the ignominious manner in which they were ejected from the N.C.A.A. Tournament.

"…I spit at the Sun!

Sad, sad, sad, sad,
Why must I be sad?"

Friday, March 16, 2012

The Victors: Project OSPREY
(№ 13) Ohio 65-60 Michigan (№ 4)
24-10, Big Ten 14-6

We played in the N.C.A.A. Tournament the same way we played in the Big Ten Tournament: poorly. That was a sad, lazy, pathetic effort & we deserved to lose the game by far more than we did. I mean no offense to the epithetless Bobcats, nor do I mean to belittle their efforts. Why did young Burke try all those three-point shots? We were down by three, yes, but there was plenty of time; we didn't need to take low-percentage long-range shots. We threw away a perfectly serviceable opportunity. We embarrassed ourselves, & only by the grace of the №-15-over-№-2 upsets will we not be an object of national ridicule. It's win-or-go-home time, & by each foolish mistake, missed defensive assignment, & idiotic shot choice we chose to go home rather than to win. This should be a very long, cold off-season for the valiant Wolverines & Coach John Beilein, an off-season full of introspection & reassessment. Drat! drat! & double drat!

Go Blue!

Science!
Rats, no neutrino-based faster-than-light propulsion system just yet: warp speed-link. The upshot is that the laws of the physical universe as we understand them have not been upended, after all.

Science!
Lies, Damned Lies, & the News
It will be interesting to hear what sort of on-air mea culpa comes forth from this weekend's broadcast of This American Life: This American Lie. Ira Glass might well be as "horrified" as he says, but I'd bet Mitt Romney $10,000 that fewer minutes of airtime are devoted to correcting the fabrications presented on This American Life as facts than were initially spent presenting those fabrications as facts; so, of what genuine use is Mr. Glass's self-serving "horror"?

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
John Williams & the London Symphony Orchestra, "To Cairo" from Raiders of the Lost Ark: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I met Jojo downtown for a late lunch this afternoon & afterward we went for a stroll along the banks of the Flint River. It was a lovely stroll, but for the niggling detail that it felt as if I was walking along the surface of the Accursed Sun. Just one week earlier I was shuffling along very nearby streets for the Art Walk, my scarf & heavy overcoat bracing me against a bone-chilling wind. 'Twas winter then, 'tis summer now, & absent yesterday's swampy humidity my thoughts dwelt upon the desert, the endless sands & the open sky. Thus, "To Cairo."

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Operation AXIOM
Two thousand fifty-six years ago to the day, 15 March 44 B.C., Gaius Julius Caesar, dictator in perpetuity (not, as is commonly misheld, "dictator for life") of the Roman Republic, was assassinated by conspirators lead by Marcus Junius Brutus, an Optimate of the old school & a rebel previously pardoned by Caesar. Far from restoring the republican nature of the Republic, the assassination renewed the civil strife Caesar had ended, sparking the wars that eventually saw Caesar's grandnephew & posthumously-adopted son, Octavian, seize power as the first Roman Emperor, Augustus. Would we remember the Ides of March were it not for Shakespeare's play The Tragedy of Julius Caesar? We are lucky that we shall never have to find out, for we live in a world brightened by the Bard's mellifluous verse.

Project GLOWWORM
The unseasonably warm weather means that I've retrieved from storage my linen Trilby & straw Trilby much earlier that I'd have liked. I wore the straw Trilby yesterday as the afternoon temperature soared into the seventies Fahrenheit; I sported the linen Trilby today due to the threat of rain. This will be the second summer for the Mark III straw Trilby (yes, 'tis true, after the worst winter ever summer is upon us at the midpoint of March, to my earnest lament), with the too-tight Mk. II straw Trilby in reserve. I see no reason why the Mk. III might not continue for the whole summer & possibly even the next; 'tis sturdier than the Mk. I straw Trilby, which itself would have been able to continue had it not be inundated by a cloudburst in Fall '10.

This is normally one of my favorite times of year, the time when winter has lasted too long for most of those around me, that melancholy period when winter seems the darkest… just before the "dawn" of spring. Instead, my insulated flatcap has been put in an upstairs closet & yesterday I wore sandals & a straw Trilby to evening Mass. I have the hats for this tragedy, thought I wish fervently they were put away for yet a few more weeks. "Misery, misery, misery."

This Week in Motorsport
Formula Fun!
Because the inaugural round of the 2012 Formula One World Championships is the Australian Grand Prix, broadcast live from literally the other side of the world, Speed's first broadcast will be in just a few hours, 1:30 A.M., the middle of the night. Hoorah for Video Cassette Recorder technology!

By Endurance We Conquer
The 12 Hours of Sebring will be run on Saturday, serving as the first round of both the new World Endurance Championship (W.E.C., a joint effort of the F.I.A. & the A.C.O., replacing the A.C.O.'s solo Intercontinental Le Mans Cup) & the 2012 American Le Mans Series (A.L.M.S.). Endurance racing won't be quite as exciting this year, as Peugeot's sudden withdrawal from the sport leaves Audi without series competition in the top L.M.P. 1 category, but Le Mans remains Le Mans. As I've groused extensively previously, the A.L.M.S. sold its soul to the Entertainment & Sports Programming Network & so the 12 Hours of Sebring won't be seen on television on Saturday; only a two-hour synopsis/mutilation will be seen after the fact, on Sunday. Those race edits provide a worse sense of the race than would a five-minute highlight package. By Lucifer's beard, why won't those fools allow me to be a fan of endurance racing in the United States! At least the W.E.C. has to some degree rejected the A.L.M.S.: the season-ending Petit Le Mans will not be a part of the W.E.C.'s inaugural 2012 campaign.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, "The Ballad of Candlepin Paul" from The Magic of Youth (T.L.A.M.)

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Obamboozled
This are the very high speed rail system President Obama wants to United States to imitate: Old 97-link. Mr. Obama's proposals wouldn't be so onerous if they weren't so explicitly derivative. If the United States should build a high speed rail network, we should do so because it suits our needs & would advance your commercial & social goals, not simply because we fear a "bullet train" gap with the People's Republic of China.

Autobahn
Last week, I saw a Bentley Continental G.T. in downtown Grand Blanc. Even in "Grahnd Blahnc" a machine from Crewe is a rare sight. At the recent North American International Auto Show, the Bentley display was the only one which kept the madding crowd at least six feet distant from the machines. There was, consequently, no opportunity for the peasants, such as your humble narrator, to sit behind the wheel & daydream about piloting a W-12-powered, $200,000 automobile. I spied retired pugilist Tommy "The Hitman" Hearns behind the barriers, having his picture in front of the Bentley Mulsanne, but I do not begrudge him his access. Who am I to say Mr. Hearns does not deserve such special consideration? 'Twas well-earned, I say.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The City of Prague Philharmonic Orchestra, "The Shadow" via iTunes (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: The theme to the unfortunate 1994 film starring Alec Baldwin as the title character.

Dienstag, 13 März
Herman's Hermits, "Mrs. Brown, You're Got a Lovely Daughter" from Herman's Hermits Retrospective (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: In a delightfully spooky coincidence, I made the acquaintance of a lovely girl surnamed Brown yesterday, but only after I'd chosen "Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Daughter" as the R.B.D.S.O.T.D.

Monday, March 12, 2012

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXVIII - The intrepid, obscene life & times of Sir Richard Francis Burton (1821-1890).







This Week in Motorsport
Beyond Thunderdome
The first round of Australia's V8 Supercars series was broadcast this past weekend, having been run the previous weekend. I videotaped the race, but have not yet had a chance to watch the broadcast. The important takeaway is that motorsport is back! Yippee! The inaugural Formula One grand prix of 2012 will be held this coming weekend, coincidentally also in Australia.

In the words of Darkseid (from Justice League Unlimited, voiced by the incomparable Michael Ironside), "Let the universe howl in despair, for I have returned!"

Rally Monkey
The 2012 World Rally Championship has been running since January, & this weekend saw the season's third rally, Rally México, but despite re-branding the channel Discovery H.D. as the car-themed Velocity, the Discovery media empire does not appear to be carrying coverage of the W.R.C. as it did in '11. I've been unable to find any American television coverage of the W.R.C. I am a child of the television age, & 'tis hard to be a fan of a sport that I never see; has been raised with nothing but newspaper accounts, I'm sure they would suffice, but I wasn't, so they don't. Curses!

The Queue
The esteem in which I hold Steve Martin is even greater after reading Born Standing Up than it was after reading his first two novels, Shopgirl & The Pleasure of My Company, & Pure Drivel, a collection of his essays. I must endeavour to read his third novel, An Object of Beauty, sooner rather than later. Born Standing Up has also stimulated a jones for more non-fiction, with the result that A War Like No Other has leapfrogged The Man who would be King and Other Stories. I must further endeavour to watch the motion picture The Jerk again sooner rather than later.

Recently
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Steve Martin, Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life

Currently
Eric Powell, The Goon: Wicked Inclinations (Vol. 5), Chinatown and the Mystery of Mr. Wicker (Vol. 6), A Place of Heartache and Grief (Vol. 7)

Presently
Victor Davis Hanson, A War Like No Other: How the Athenians and Spartans Fought the Peloponnesian War
Eric Powell, The Goon: Those That is Damned (Vol. 8), Calamity of Conscience (Vol. 9), & Death's Greedy Comeuppance (Vol. 10)
Rudyard Kipling, The Man who would be King and Other Stories
Edgar Rice Burroughs, The Gods of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Erykah Badu & The Blues Brothers, "Funky Nassau" from Blues Brothers 2000: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (M I K E)

Sunday, March 11, 2012

The Victors: Project OSPREY
The Madness beckons. The "Big Dance" starts on Thursday (play-ins on Tuesday & Wednesday); the valiant Wolverines are the № 4 seed in the Midwest Regional Bracket & face the № 10 seed, the epithetless Bobcats of Ohio University, on Friday. Let us hope the valiant Wolverines are better prepared for the N.C.A.A. Tournament than they were for the Big Ten Tournament. The Madness! The Madness!

Saturday, 10 March
(№ 7) Ohio State 77-55 Michigan (№ 10)
24-9, Big Ten 14-6

Well, that was embarrassing, more a repeat of January's 64-49 drubbing at the hands of those same hated Buckeyes rather than February's 56-51 victory over that same ancient foe. The worst part was the insistent futility of Trey Burke's play; the young man was plainly out of his depth, throwing up brick after brick in an attempt to win the game by himself, rather than passing to teammates with better shooting positions. The fault lies with Coach John Beilein, for leaving Burke on the court to flail; there is a strong argument to make that when a player is struggling he must be allowed to play through the doldrums back to success, but I am of the opinion that there comes a point in a game when a player must be sat down & told that he will indeed have a chance at redemption, but on another day. Oh well, no use crying over spilt milk.

The most annoying part of watching any Michigan game is that at some point my father will drift into the room (or in the case of tournament games he's more likely to emerge from his hobby room in the basement to watch the game with me on the first floor) & immediately launch into a baseless tirade against Michigan's head coach, John Beilein. At least I think the tirades are directed against Beilein ("bee-line"); my father is always ranting against the inadequacies of someone named "Baerlein," whom he regards as uniquely unsuited to the rigors of coaching in the Big Ten. (Side note: O, how I loathe the "B1G" logo!) He provides no reasons for why he believes "Baerlein" to be so uniquely incapable, but this does nothing to shake my father's confidence in the assertion. The only way to shut him up is to initiate a harsh attack on Purdue's, his alma mater, recent lack of success, including the ill-starred Boilermakers' early (at least earlier than Michigan) exit from the Big Ten tourney. He hates Michigan State & Ohio State more than he hates Michigan, but he criticizes Michigan's coaches most fiercely of all. What a jerk!

Friday, 9 March
(№ 10) Michigan 73-69 Minnesota (O.T.)
24-8, Big Ten 14-5

It was worrying that it took overtime time for the valiant Wolverines to prevail over the luckless Golden Gophers. This just wasn't the Maize & Blue's weekend; we seemed never to play our best, never to find a comfort zone.

Go Blue!

Project MERCATOR
Ska Army rang me on Friday & asked if I had plans for the evening, which I did not. He invited me to join him & another fellow at Art Walk, a monthly cultural fête in downtown Flinttown. I told him I'd be happy to join him, but that dinner was presently being prepared & I was ravenous—which I was, having skipped lunch—; so, I would ring him after I finished dinner. It turns out that my mother was preparing her homemade macaroni & cheese, a tasty treat perfect for a Lenten Friday, but a meal with a lengthy, multi-step preparation. Dinner was not served for thirty-five minutes after I rang off from Ska Army & I was not able to ring him back 'til seventy minutes after his original call. I motored downtown, parked along Saginaw Street, & soon joined Ska Army & his pal Seth, whom I've met a few times. We trekked to the Buckham Alley Gallery, an oven just as it's been during every other Art Walk I've attended. We poked fun at the art; said hello to Mr. & Mrs. Dick, the married couple from The Loose Ties; & were predictably disappointed to learn what a serigraph is. We next trekked to the Greater Flint Arts Council, where as usual I would define more of the works displayed as "crafts" rather than "art." Mr. & Mrs. Dick weren't following us, they were just following the same path several minutes behind us; so, we again enjoyed the pleasure of their company. Not long after, the evening was called on account of everything to see having been seen (they'd visited the several other Art Walk venues before our rendezvous) & the gloriously bone-chilling cold. I bid my fellows a good night I trekked back to Lumi the Snow Queen, enjoying the last truly cold night for many months to come.

I had no desire to go out when Ska Army called me, especially after the distasteful incident of ferrying him home from his birthday party, but wanting to stay in & play hermit is not sufficient reason to decline a social invitation under the protocols of Project MERCATOR. I'm lucky to have any friends at all; so, I should not neglect them when they wish to spend time with me. (Imagine if MERCATOR had been in effect in high school, when I declined nine out of ten invitations, to my grave social detriment.) My biggest objection was the spontaneity of the outing. Ska Army called at 6:30 & was already downtown. Had I been waiting by the 'phone for an invitation, I might have been able to join him in a timely fashion—as it was, the time spent at Art Walk was too short, hardly worth my while—, but given the necessary delay for dinner the plan was hardly actionable. Had we previously discussed going to Art Walk, even as late as earlier that very day, the necessary modifications to schedule could have been made for me to join Ska Army & Seth earlier. In the words of John "Hannibal" Smith (portrayed by the late handsome actor George Peppard), "I love it when a plan comes together." I like plans, I like preparation; I like for potential difficulties to have been considered & solutions previously devised. The evening would have been a far greater success with greater forewarning; forewarned, as they say, is forearmed.

The Queue
A bit of wisdom from the great Steve Martin, the veracity of which my own experiences in public speaking/performance confirm entirely, not that such a seasoned pro. needs my amateurish verification. Ahem.
The consistent work enhanced my act. I learned a lesson: It was easy to be great. Every entertainer has a night when everything is clicking. These nights are accidental and statistical: Like lucky cards in poker, you can count on them occurring over time. What was hard was to be good, consistently good, night after night, no matter what the abominable circumstances. (Born Standing Up, p. 139)

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, "Don't Worry Desmond Dekker" from Medium Rare (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: One of the many things I love about The Bosstones is their propensity to write nostalgic songs, songs in which a small happenstance in the present casts back the mind upon the foreign country that it the past. This suits my innately wistful disposition to a T.

"And I (whoa oh)
I can hear your laughter, (whoa oh)
It stays with me after (whoa oh)
All this time,
And I (whoa oh)
I still got your records, (whoa oh)
Clash and The Selecter, (whoa oh)
And don't worry, Desmond Dekker's doin' fine."

Also, a bit of housekeeping: April approaches swiftly, & with it SKApril '12, the R.B.D.S.O.T.D.'s second month-long celebration of the ska. I'd be grateful for nominations of bands or songs for SKApril. I thank you.


Samstag, 10 März
Fountains of Wayne, "Red Dragon Tattoo" from Utopia Parkway (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary:

"Red dragon tattoo is just about on me,
I got it for you, so now do you want me?
With nothing to prove, will you by my honey?
Oh yeah, in you I confide,
Red dragon tattoo,
I'm fit to be dyed, am I fit to have you?"

Friday, March 9, 2012

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
The Forces of Evil, "Go to Hell" from Friend or Foe? (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I decided upon today's R.B.D.S.O.T.D. as soon as I woke up, rather, as soon as I was woken up by a persistent, loud, & profoundly irritating Diva, who just couldn't wait to be let into my room on the wrong side of 7:00 A.M. Confound you, cat!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXVII - The lost city of Iram of the Pillars, possibly, but not necessarily found beneath the sands as Ubar.







Operation AXIOM
The Nelson Pillar, landmark of Dublin, was destroyed by the philistine vandals of the terrorist group the Irish Republican Army forty-six years ago to the day, 8 March 1966. The Pillar's modern replacement, the snicker-worthy Spire of Dublin, is so inconsequential that despite being an active seeker of tourist traps to patronize I heard not a word about it during my recent visit to Dublin. The I.R.A. weren't just enemies of Great Britain, they were enemies of all law & order, enemies of civilization itself.

The Queue
The only thing wrong with City of Gold is that it went by too swiftly, i.e., it could have gone on twice as long without losing my interest. I wish it had spawned a series; I'd have loved to read the sequel, City of Brass. Alas! Alas!

Recently
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
Eric Powell, The Goon: Heaps of Ruination (Vol. 3) & Virtue and the Grim Consequences Thereof (Vol. 4)
Len Deighton, City of Gold

Currently
Steve Martin, Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life

Presently
Eric Powell, The Goon: Wicked Inclinations (Vol. 5), Chinatown and the Mystery of Mr. Wicker (Vol. 6), A Place of Heartache and Grief (Vol. 7), & Those That is Damned (Vol. 8)
Rudyard Kipling, The Man who would be King and Other Stories
Victor Davis Hanson, A War Like No Other: How the Athenians and Spartans Fought the Peloponnesian War
Edgar Rice Burroughs, The Gods of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Dropkick Murphys, "Fields of Athenry" from Blackout (T.L.A.M.)
Happy Birthday!
Fondest wishes for a happy birthday to my father! The old boy's infuriating & he's getting a little long in the tooth, but he's still my pop & I'd love him even if not compelled to do so by the Fourth Commandment. I plan to visit the cinema later & buy tickets for us to see the new motion picture John Carter tomorrow, since Dad fondly remembers the John Carter/Barsoom novels from his youth, just one part of his birthday gifts. Happy birthday, Dad!

Science!
Egad! Web-link. I can't be the only one who's reminded of the old Jeff Daniels classic Arachnophobia. I do not have an especial case of arachnophobia, but that movie scared the daylights out of me when I was a lad. *shudder*

Science!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Vote for Kodos: Mean Edition
Not-so-super "Super Tuesday" yielded good news, better news, the best news, & bad news. The best news is that a blow was struck against gold-drunk, isolationist, race-baiting lunacy by Representative Ron Paul, M.D.'s ("R." [L.]-Texas) failure to win a single state, not even any of the caucus states, where wingnuts hold sway. Take that, you anti-Semitic John Birch Society bastards! The better news is that Speaker Newt Gingrich's Ego (R.-GA) carried only his home state of Georgia, proving that the Ego has no appeal outside of the deepest South, the kind of places where they only-too-willingly shriek "Sieg Heil!" before the Confederate swastika. The good news is that Senator Rick Santorum's (R.-PA) double-digit lead in Ohio evaporated in only a week, demonstrating once again that the only people who support the sweater vest are those who know nothing about his record in the Senate & vote "anybody but Romney" out of bigotry against Mormonism. The bad news is that Governor Mitt Romney (R.-MA) is still having to waste his time not attacking President Obama's abysmal record of failure, but defending his own illustrious record of success against straw-man attacks from the sweater vest's campaign, the Ego's "shampaign" (with reluctant thanks to Rachel Maddow), & the physician's parade of the Golden Calf. At least much has been done to restore the rightful air of inevitability about Mr. Romney's bid for the Republican nomination: B.B.C.-link.

Onward to victory!

Urbi et Orbi
During Mass this evening, Father Steve made an aside that not saying anything mean about anyone would be a tremendous way to observe Lent. Whoops! Sorry, Padre, but that ship has sailed. (Maybe next Lent, in what won't be an election year?)

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
"Weird Al" Yankovic, "Polka Face" from Alpocalypse (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: "Polka Face" might be my favorite of all "Weird Al's" polka medleys, & that's no mean feat.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Vote for Kodos
Senator Santorum flooded the State of Michigan with "robo-calls" urging Democrats to undermine the legitimacy of last week's Republican presidential primary, & yet now he's haraunging the Michigan G.O.P. for awarding Governor Romney to two at-large delegates who were always to be given to the winner of said state Republican presidental primary? Mr. Romney carried the statewide vote by 41% to Santorum's 38%, clearly entitling the governor to those two delegates, the winner's bonus. There are few things more revealing of a man's character than how he reacts to a defeat or a reversal. The senator has revealed himself to be, amongst many other things, a sore loser. What a jerk!

'Tis hoped that "Super Tuesday" commentary will be more prompt. Time for reflection is laudable, but a week's delay is ridiculous, Mike.

Obamboozled
I watched President Obama's speech to A.I.P.A.C. on C.-S.P.A.N. The most noteworthy feature was the president's repeated assertions that no one could doubt his commitment to Israel's security & the Israeli-American martial & diplomatic alliance. Were there no grounds for doubting Mr. Obama's fidelity to that decades-old alliance, why are there so many of us—including the reliably Democratic voters of New York's 9th Congressional District in a special election last fall—possessed of those very doubts? Iosif Dzhugashvili had a point when he observed that "quantity has a quality all its own," but the endless repetition of a dubious assertion does little to nothing to augment the veracity of that assertion. I am naturally inclined to view the president as petulant; take my perception of his speech's petulance with a grain of salt.

President Obama looked tired during today's very rare press conference. (Hey, remember the vociferous manner in which Candidate Obama criticized then-President Bush for not holding enough press conferences? Those intemperate remarks are funny, in a very bitter way, now that it is Mr. Obama who hadn't held a press conference for months.) Take heart, Mr. President, with any luck you'll be able to retire & to recover your vim & vigor in just a few short months, at noon on 20 January of next year. I think principally of your well being, sir.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Icon for Hire, "The Grey" from Scripted (T.L.A.M.)

Monday, March 5, 2012

Kith & Kin
The ranks of my kin swelled by one on Friday, with the birth of Lucianna (code name pending)—"Lucy"—, my niece & Where's Teddy?'s little sister. Mother & baby came through with flying colors & came home to Xanadu on Sunday. She's been described as "looking like [Where's Teddy?];" I won't comment 'til Lucy has reached the cuter stage that occurs once the wee bairn transitions from being a newborn to being an infant. Lucy! Lucy! Lucy! I can't wait to meet my niece, to begin her indoctrination: Remember, wee Lucy, Uncle Mike is your favorite. Uncle Mike loves you very much.



"And now for something completely different."

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXVI - Kuru & the Fore people of Papua New Guinea.









The Savage Wars of Peace
Three cheers for the African Union's forces in Somalia, fighting the good fight against local al-Qaeda franchise al-Shabaab: Somali-link. Hip hip! Hooray! Hip hip! Hooray! Hip hip! Hooray! Somalia is a lovely example with which to refute the isolationist line that failed states in far-off corners of the world represent no threat to U.S. national security. Absent a viable Somali state & the international will to do anything to rectify this sorry state of affairs, lawlessness reigns. Absent any law, criminal gangs hold sway; international trade is compromised through piracy. (Piracy! As if the seventeenth century lived again.) Absent a cohesive state, terrorist groups like the erstwhile Islamic Courts Union & al-Shabaab fill the vacuum. al-Shabaab has already launched terrorist attacks against civilians as far afield from Somalia as Uganda, & has been closely linked to al-Qaeda's franchise in Yemen, al-Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula (A.Q.A.P.). A.Q.A.P. is infamous for its innovative attacks on the U.S. proper, such as the attempted bombing of Northwest Airlines Flight 253 above Detroit on Christmas Day in '09 & the attempted bombing of cargo planes in September '10. Far from being a response to U.S. troops deployments to Somalia or Yemen, the activities of al-Shabaab & A.Q.A.P. are acts of savage aggression against an international order built on liberal democracy, the rule of law, & respect for human rights, everything which al-Qaeda has sworn to sunder.

Pretending that the international order from which we have benefited so richly does not require the security guarantee that America alone can provide flies in the face of what bitter experience has shown. The world left Afghanistan to its own devices in the 1990s, & as a result the Taliban provided the sanctuary from which al-Qaeda plotted & executed 9/11. What would happen now were the world to turn a blind eye to Somalia, allowing al-Shabaab to consolidate its grip on power? Do not be fooled by the fact that the forces on the ground doing the fighting in Somalia are from the African Union, not the United States; the bulk of the troops operating against al-Shabaab are from Ethiopia & Uganda, two stalwart U.S. allies in the post-9/11 wars. Withdrawing from the world, "bringing all our boys home," is not a feasible—let alone a wise—national security strategy for the United States. Isolationism made us less safe, not more safe, in the decades before the Second World War. Isolation today would make us less safe, not more safe, despite the comforting fantasies spun by some on the Left &, more disturbingly, by all too many on the Right

The Queue
About a third of the way into City of Gold I'm far more reminded of the Bernard Samson novels than Deighton's lesser, non-Samson novels. Blasted shame to have so long deferred this read.

Also, the other week my dad asked me a question about the Athenian Sicilian Expedition during the Peloponnesian War (that's normal, right?) &, to my chagrin, I could not answer his query in anything other than generalities. Consequently, I've decided to take the plunge & finally read A War Like No Other. Hanson's Culture and Carnage was both accessible & coherently argued; so, I have high hopes for the same author's account of the war 'twixt Sparta† & Athens*, the war for the ancient Greek soul.

After that excursion into Hellenic non-fiction, I intend to return to Barsoom (Burroughs's swashbuckling Mars) with The Gods of Mars, after which I'll either continue directly with the next volume, The Warlord of Mars, or alternate between Barsoom & a non-Burroughs selection.

Recently
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Blue Lotus (Vol. 5) & Red Rackham's Treasure (Vol. 12)
Eric Powell, The Goon: Heaps of Ruination (Vol. 3) & Virtue and the Grim Consequences Thereof (Vol. 4)

Currently
Len Deighton, City of Gold

Presently
Steve Martin, Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life
Rudyard Kipling, The Man who would be King and Other Stories
Victor Davis Hanson, A War Like No Other: How the Athenians and Spartans Fought the Peloponnesian War
Edgar Rice Burroughs, The Gods of Mars

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Ivy, "Lucy Doesn't Love You" from Long Distance (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: Been on my mind since Saturday.

"Nothing's every going to make her happy,
She doesn't mind 'cause she's used to it that way."


Sonntag, 4 März
The Aquabats!, "Just Can't Lose!" from Hi-Five Soup! (Captain Thumbs-up)

Commentary: Chosen in Lucy-delayed celebration of the long-awaited premiere of The Aquabats! Super Show!. It's finally here! Yippee! Contrast the never-say-die optimism of "Just Can't Lose!" with the behind-every-silver-lining-there-is-a-dark-cloud pessimism of "You Can't Win" by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones; the beauty of The Aquabats'! indefatigable striving to see the upside of everything is that they possessed it even when they were a ska band.

"'Cause no matter what I do I just can't lose,
And even if I do I'll jump your bike right above your roof,
(Yeah!)
'Cause if I crash real bad,
Your sister will think I'm rad,
No matter, no matter what I do, I just can't lose!"


Samstag, 3 März
William Shatner, "Spleen/Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" from The Transformed Man (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: By the time Lucy was born on Freitag, I'd already selected the R.B.D.S.O.T.D. I wondered what sort of song was appropriate as a greeting to life, & turned to the births of Where's Teddy? & The Squeak for guidance. On both occasions, I'd picked songs with the babe's given name in the title, "Where's Teddy?" for him & "Believe Me Natalie" (should be "Believe Me, Natalie") for her. Searching my musical library, I came upon two songs with Lucy in the title: Saturday's R.B.D.S.O.T.D. by William Shatner & "Lucy Doesn't Love You" by Ivy. Neither seemed fitting to the occasion, but what song would, aside from Stevie Wonder's "Isn't She Lovely?," a choice that seemed terribly unfair to Where's Teddy? & any subsequent boys, since they could not be so celebrated. Lucy is too young, far too young, to have evinced much in the way of a distinct personality; so, how could I pick a song that was specific to her, expect by her name? Of the two, I like "Lucy Doesn't Love You" better, especially since the overwrought, unintentionally hilarious The Transformed Man is no match for Shatner's later masterwork, Has Been, but I could think of no finer way to welcome Lucy into the clan, a tribe of nerds (science fiction fans, political junkies, & myriad additional nerdy pursuits), than with the dulcet tones of Captain James T. Kirk himself. Welcome to the world, Lucy!

*Athens = virtuous, yet vicious
†Sparta = vicious, yet virtuous

Friday, March 2, 2012

Kith & Kin
My father has recently started watching Grimm, a show I've followed since its premiere in the fall. I would love to be a big enough man not to be irked by this, but watching a show with my father is a grueling experience. He makes unfunny jokes about the on-screen action, jokes at which he laughs loudly, & with a disturbing frequency he misses key plot points & asks me to explain them to him. This isn't necessarily the encroachment of senility—he claims to "zone out," a plausible explanation given his "absentminded professor" persona—, but if he wants us to watch a show together is it really too much to ask that he pay a modicum of attention? Most irritating of all, he always refers to the protagonist, Detective Nick Burckhardt, as "Grimm." This is not necessarily inaccurate, as Nick is a Grimm, & the only living Grimm of whom we are currently aware within the universe of the show, but there is something in the way my dad uses Grimm as the character's name that reminds me of an old bit in which Homer Simpson referred to John McClane, Bruce Willis's character from the Die Hard film franchise, as "Die Hard."

I am well aware of the blessed nature of my life that such a trifling annoyance is one of my bigger vexations. I grouse in part as a way to remind myself of how fortunate I truly am.

The Queue
To blazes with David Ignatius & Body of Lies! The governing principle of my reading selections is "so many books, so little time;" I have not the time to waste on such as that dreck. Bring on City of Gold by Len Deighton!

Also, the other night I caught the motion picture The Man Who Would Be King on Turner Classic Movies, thus prompting the swift rise of The Man who would be King and Other Stories to near the top of the queue. I enjoyed Kim immensely & the time has come to experience more of Kipling's prose.

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Senator & The New Republic, "Intermission" via iTunes, (free) Single of the Week (T.L.A.M.)

Thursday, March 1, 2012

The Explorers' Club
№ CCLXXV - The Forbidden City.







Project MERCATOR | Happy Birthday!
Today is Ska Army's birthday, though he sometimes likes to claim he was born on Leap Day; so, last night he invited a gang of his fellows out for ill-defined revelry to celebrate the anniversary of his birth. I was slightly miffed to be asked to miss the half-season premiere of Psych to celebrate his birthday on a day that isn't his birthday, but that was insufficient reason to refuse the invitation. (Plus, I have preserved Psych though the modern marvel of videotape recording.) Many drinks & many laughs punctuated the evening, & as it wore on it became increasingly evident that Ska Army's plan of drinking to excess was ill-conceived, as he was soon in no shape to pilot his motorcar, his intended means of getting home. Fear not, I acted as (self-)designated driver* & at the close of the festivities conveyed him to his home in Lumi the Snow Queen. I'm a decent enough bloke to have driven him home, but not so decent as to have today assisted him in the retrieval of said left-behind motorcar. I was not aware of the ersatz party 'til mere hours beforehand & I stayed out much later than I'd intended, but it was worthwhile insofar as I believe the quasi-birthday boy had a gay old time. Happy birthday, Aaron!

At one point, April May June, who was at the same public house with a different party, bought a pair of double shots, one each for herself & Ska Army. I fear he's pining for her, despite her stated desire to be "just friends." Ah, well, he's a big boy & if he doesn't know better already he'll learn sooner or later.

*An act of multifaceted sobriety, being both socially responsible & inexpensive.

Project GLOWWORM
I did not wear a hat on Ash Wednesday because I did not wish to smudge or remove the ashes from my forehead. Last weekend, the blonde whirlwind code named Miss Alaska borrowed my flatcap & wore it at a jaunty angle. Circumstances conspired so that I could not retrieve it right away & had to walk around in the (all too rare) winter chill of far western Connecticut without any headgear. I'd cut my hair days earlier & thus my head was quite cold. Later, Miss Alaska asked if she could keep my flatcap (she's insane; so, I have no ideas if she was jesting or in earnest), because it looked better on her. I put my foot down & demanded the return of my hat. Yes, my hats are stylish, but more importantly they are functional. They protect me from the winter's chill & the death rays of the Accursed Sun. A man should wear a hat, a conviction steadily reinforced by a variety of circumstances & experiences.
The Queue
Body of Lies is off to an inauspicious start. The first three blurbs on the back cover are from the detestable Seymour Hersh, the laughable Chris Matthews, & the wretched George Tenet, but those do not constitute the inauspicious start to which I am referring, as their creation & selection might well be outside Ignatius's control. No, I'm referring to Ignatius's snarky asides. Interspersed throughout the narrative, alongside the plot developments & character sketches, are slights & digs that might just as well have been lifted from a MoveOn.org or Kerry/Edwards '04 press release. I expect neither a novelist nor a novel to be without personal politics, but I also think it not unreasonable to expect a novel to have a more sophisticated & nuanced understanding of the world than the infamous "General Petraeus or General Betray Us?" advert. The decision to continue or to abandon Body of Lies will be made in the next twenty to thirty pages; there are too many great books I'll never read to waste my time reading rubbish of which I am constantly suspicious.

Recently
H. Rider Haggard, King Solomon's Mines
Eric Powell, The Goon: Rough Stuff (Volume 0), Nothin' But Misery (Vol. 1), & My Murderous Childhood (and Other Grievous Yarns) (Vol. 2)
Hergé, The Adventures of Tintin: The Blue Lotus (Vol. 5) & Red Rackham's Treasure (Vol. 12)

Currently
David Ignatius, Body of Lies

Presently
Len Deighton, City of Gold
Eric Powell, The Goon: Heaps of Ruination (Vol. 3) & Virtue and the Grim Consequences Thereof (Vol. 4)
Steve Martin, Born Standing Up: A Comic's Life
Rudyard Kipling, The Man who would be King and Other Stories

The Rebel Black Dot Songs of the Day
Spinal Tap, "Stonehenge" from This is Spinal Tap (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I woke up this morning to the B.B.C. World Service sounding in my ears & "Stonehenge" sounding in my brain. Not a bad way to start the day.

Mittwoch, 29 Februar
Icon for Hire, "Make a Move" via iTunes, (free) Discovery Download of the Week (T.L.A.M.)

Commentary: I'm a sucker for poppy rock bands fronted by distaff singers. I'm not proud of this, but I won't deny it.