The Victors

Saturday, 9 November 2013
Nebraska 17-13 Michigan
6-3, Big Ten 2-3

We now have a losing record in the Big Ten, & for the second game in a row had negative rushing yardage, meaning we lost more yards on sacks & tackles behind the line of scrimmage than we gained on successful rushing plays. Yet, despite this obvious offensive futility, Coach Borges (offensive coordinator) persists in the same misbegotten game plan & Coach Hoke (head coach) continues to place his & the valiant Wolverines' fate in Borges's plainly inept hands. Jason Segel put it well in his song "Dracula's Lament," from the motion picture Forgetting Sarah Marshall:

It's getting king of hard to believe things are going to get better,
I've been drowning too long to believe that the tide's going to turn,
And I've been living too hard to believe things are going to get easier,
I'm still trying to shake off the pain from the lesson I've learned…

(The song then goes into a elaborate revenge fantasy about Professor Abraham Van Helsing, which is less pertinent to our discussion of the sorry & worsening state of Michigan football.)

Under Hoke, the valiant Wolverines lost two games in 2011, five games in 2012, & in 2013? The sky's the limit. We have been awful on the road (the demoralizing loss to the unwelcome Cornhuskers was the first home loss of Hoke's tenure), making the visits to Northwestern & Iowa particularly perilous; we have lost two games in a row, we face two consecutive road games against desperate clubs, & then we host the as-yet-undefeated hated Buckeyes in Michigan Stadium. This shouldn't be a murderers' row, but playing as we are it certainly looks like one. I am searching desperately for some sign that this year's valiant Wolverines have not given up, aren't the quitters that their shellshocked play against the dastardly Spartans & the unwelcome Cornhuskers signaled. On the verge of panic, I am looking for some small sign of hope, & the joke "Hoke springs eternal" isn't cutting the mustard anymore.

Go Blue!

The Rebel Black Dot Song of the Day
Cake, "Comfort Eagle" from Comfort Eagle (T.L.A.M.)