Skammentary: "Please Don't Tell Her I Have a Girlfriend" is a deeply immoral song, which just also happens to be freaking hilarious.
"Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
'Cause it's so hard, can't even pretend
That I only want to be her friend.
"Well, I don't deserve it, you know that it's true,
But she said that she would and you know I would, too,
Oh, oh, what am I gonna do?
"Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
'Cause it's so hard, can't even pretend
That I only want to be her friend.
"Well, I know that actions speak louder than words,
And thinking is bad but doing's much worse,
Oh, oh, but I'm so perverse.
"Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
Please don't tell her I have a girlfriend,
'Cause it's so hard, can't even pretend
That I only want to be her friend…"
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