Honolulu Blue Forever
Great day in the morning, do I even need to say anything about Roy "Not the Good Roy Williams" Williams? That Matt Millen still has a job goes a long way to explaining why the Ford Motor Company is in such desperate straits. Henry Ford was a monstrous anti-Semite whom I'm sure is burning in Perdition's flames as I type these lines, but he was a hell of a businessman. His decendents, who seem to be far better human beings, are nepotistic idiots. 21-59 in five seasons, 0-2 so far in the sixth. Millen's record speaks for itself.

As for the rest of the Lions, who in the hell gives up four aerial touchdowns to Rex Grossman? Rex Grossman! Mr. Injury-prone himself! Rex "I Can't Believe We Lost to This Frickin' Idiot" Grossman! Gah! I am so very, very torn. On the one hand, I love the Lions so much and I want them to win. On the other hand, the Lions are doomed so long as Millen captains the ship; so, there is a certain ruthless logic in rooting for the Lions to lose every single game to hasten Millen's firing. (Even W.C. Ford's blind, stupid faith has to have a breaking point, doesn't it? Doesn't it?) On the gripping hand, the Lions have been so bad for so long that the "glory" days of Wayne Fontes and losing in the first round of the playoffs like clockwork seem like another lifetime. The idea that the Lions will ever be anything but terrible seems laughable; so, why even hope that they'll get better? They'll never get better. They'll always be on par with the Houston Texans and the Arizona Cardinals. And as long as there's no hope of getting better, why rant and rage against the damnable nimrods who are the architects of this sorry state of affairs?

On the one hand, cheer in vain for victories. On the other hand, cheer in vain for changes in the front office. On the gripping hand, cheer for the Lions with no thought toward victory or defeat. Oh, the gripping hand is stupendously tempting, but I just can't make the leap from outrage to apathy. That feels too much like letting Millen win. Nevermind that Millen has already won by fleecing the franchise for millions, paid ever-increasing amounts of money while reducing the team to the laughingstock of the NFL. I was here before he came and I am determined to be here when he's finally, finally run out of town, far, far too late to make any difference. I will continue to be of two minds, cheering for "the Lions" in the abstract while perversely enjoying each bumbling misstep of Millen's chosen players and coaches.

I'm sad because the Lions lost to the Bears, but I'm happy that Chicago made Roy Williams eat his asinine words. I hate losing a divisional game, but I'm glad that Millen's lapdogs Marinelli and Martz are being exposed as chumps. I am of two minds and will be for the indefinite future. The Lions will always be my team; so, tomorrow I'll be wearing my Honolulu blue T-shirt as a token of my solidarity, even though I smile whenever I see that 34-7 score. Fuck you, Roy Williams. Fuck you, Matt Millen. Fuck you, William Clay Ford.