Science!
Would any of you be interested in co-founding and/or joining a radical organization called the Pluto Restoration Front? I love science; had not my faith in the Almighty been concretely established by the touching of my heart by the Holy Ghost, science would be my god. And so I have the greatest respect for those who dedicate their lives to science, the scientists. However, the International Astronomical Union (IAU) has gone too far and must be stopped. Yes, the existence of Eris raises serious questions about Pluto's status as a planet, but the definition the IAU devised to reclassify Pluto as a dwarf planet (alongside Eris and the former asteroid Ceres) is hogwash.

A planet must a) orbit the Sun, b) be large enough for its own gravity to make it round, and c) have "cleared the neighbourhood" of smaller celestial bodies. "Cleared the neighbourhood"? What the devil does that even mean? What is a planet's "neighbourhood"? 0.1 AU from the center of the planet? 0.05 AU from the upper reaches of the plent's atmosphere? What? The IAU, in it's dubious wisdom chose to not define "neighbourhood" in the slightest degree. The IAU's "definition" of a planet is, at best, perilously nebulous. A kilogram isn't one thousand freeform units called grams, it's one thousand grams; and you can then ask what a gram is an be provided a specific definition. The criteria used to downgrade Pluto from a "planet" to a "dwarf planet" is pseudoscientific gibberish!

Pluto is smaller than Eris; so, unless we want to define Eris as the tenth planet and open the door for dozens of other minute planets, we need clear rules defining what is and is not a planet. The currently agreed standard is in no way up to the task. The de-planetization of Pluto was hasty and unjust. This cannot stand.

That's where my nascent organization comes in. The Pluto Restoration Front will defend Pluto's honor against the capricious predations of the IAU. The PRF will uncover the sinister agenda behind the IAU's vendetta against Pluto. Science will be freed from the grip of fat cat scientists sitting in smoke-filled rooms making crucial scientific decisions willy-nilly! As Pluto goes, so goes all of science! Science!

Help defend science, help me found the Pluto Restoration Front. Others topics of interest to the PRF will include the theoretical intra-Mercurial planet Vulcan and the hypothetical star Nemesis. Science!