Wednesday, March 21, 2018

The Rebel Black Dot Songs o' History Quiz Night

Project MERCATOR: Misty Beavers (uncertain)—The History o' History Quiz Night '18, in Song
Reel Big Fish, "Somebody Hates Me" (live) from Our Live Album Is Better than Your Live Album, Disc 1: More Shtick than You Can Shake a Stick At (The Last Angry Man)

Commentary: We Misty Beavers are very accustomed to the hostility, even hatred of our competitors. Less familiar is the open hatred of the event organizers themselves, the faculty of the University of Michigan—Flint History Department. The Quizmaster boasted of loving us, but also of hating us, comparing us to the New York Yankees. One of the lecturers (he doesn't have a doctorate; so, he's not formally a professor) all but accused us of cheating—How dare he!—& implied he'd be watching us like Nineteen Eighty-four's Ministry of Love (Miniluv). The rules of History Quiz Night were changed mid-game, regarding the use of the free answer cards given to all teams, & when we attempted to use one of our cards in accordance with the new rules, one of the professors simply refused to accept it, refusing to supply us with the answer to which the card entitled us. Several years ago, the History Quiz Night format was changed so that instead of the faculty scoring each team's answer sheet after each round, neighboring teams exchange sheets & score each other. (This is both less work for the organizers, allowing them to drink more earlier, & shortens the interval 'twixt rounds.) Yet, curiously, when scores were announced after each round, we were scored a point or two lower than our neighboring team told us they'd scored us; so, either the other team was gaslighting us or the organizers were rechecking our answers, judging us by a different standard than any other team.
"I just made an enemy of someone I don't know
And they are upset about something that I must have done,
It really doesn't make much sense,
Well, I've got no statement in my defense—but!

"I know,
No matter what,
No matter who,
No matter what I do,
Somebody hates me!
(Somebody hates me!)
Somebody hates me! Somebody hates me!
(Somebody hates me!)
Somebody hates me!
Somebody hates me & I hate somebody, too!

"Did you misunderstand something that I did?
Or was there one of my jokes that you didn't get?
Or do you think you got the way I think all figured out?
What did I say to make you feel not cool now? Well!

"I know,
No matter what,
No matter who,
No matter what I do,
Somebody hates me!
(Somebody hates me!)
Somebody hates me! Somebody hates me!
(Somebody hates me!)
Somebody hates me!
Somebody hates me & I hate somebody, too!

"I know it's wrong,
I do it too (I do it, too),
I guess I should say:
Don't let it get to you…"

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