Novocaine
My dentist, the venerable Dr. Bowles, has retired. He left his practice and his patients to his slovenly son, who wore black jeans and a scrub shirt as opposed to the elder Dr. Bowles's slacks and tie. Now, in a bit of shadiness with which I am not at all comfortable, the son has seemingly passed the practice on to someone completely new, who has given the practice a name beyond his own, "Parkside Dental." No, sir, I don't like it.

I had an appointment scheduled for this afternoon (scheduled six months ago) which I will be unable to keep. Moments ago, I called to impart this information... and had to leave a message! What? High and mighty Parkside Bullshit doesn't open until 9:00am. No fan of early rising am I, but dental office are supposed to be open before the rooster crows. Back in middle school, on many a morning did I fall asleep in the dental chair while Dr. Bowles adjusted my braces, as often as not while he was actually working on my mouth. Oh, the halcyon days of youth.... Dentist offices are supposed to be open early so that people may get their teeth cleaned without having to take time off of work; such is the natural order of things. Like almost everything mentioned or alluded to in Leviticus, Parkside Dental is an abomination.