Countdown to Infinite Mediocrity
I have just read a comic book titled Countdown to Infinite Crisis, and it made me want to cry. Within a year, I will no longer be a reader of superhero comic books; that is neither an oath nor a guarantee, merely a prediction. I gave up Marvel books years ago, when I learned enough to recognize the fundamental principles of the Marvel Universe, and recoiled in disgust. Now it appears my beloved DC Universe, home of the world's greatest heroes (Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, the list is nearly endless), is being put to an early death. Apparently, no story is worth telling if a minor-but-enduring character isn't killed. Sue Dibny? Tossed away like trash. The Blue Beetle? Killed for pure shock value. The DCU is being infused with a Donald Trump-like showmanship, and I cannot be a party to such a travesty.

As I said, I am making predictions. I not yet know the story of the looming Infinite Crisis. (Nothing looms benevolently, I chose the word for its ominous connotations.) But I do know that the miniseries Identity Crisis was worth less than the sum of it's parts. I do know that in just eighty pages Countdown to Infinite Crisis contained almost everything I hate about superhero comics. (No love is without some loathing.) I do know that I will continue reading DC books until the last possible moment, that I won't give up all hope until even the hope that there is hope is well and truly gone. Yes, I'm being melodramatic, but I am talking about comic book superheroics after all. Melodrama is par for the course. Hell, melodrama is the course.

So now I begin the long goodbye. I have only read comics for five years; so, taking a year to say goodbye is a bit like Jay Leno announcing that he's going to retire... in 2009. And even when I no longer read the adventures of Aquaman and Captain Marvel, Robin and the Super Buddies, I will still read comics. There will still be Blue Monday and Hopeless Savages, Hellboy and B.P.R.D., and maybe even Star Wars Tales, because I'm sentimental and will have a hard time letting go after Revenge of the Sith. I will still read comics, but the lion's share of what I currently read is DC Comics superhero books. Things won't be the same once there is no longer a small, regular pile waiting for me every Wednesday. I am saying goodbye to so many things these days - Sam, Star Wars, Star Trek, DC - that it sometimes seems as if it's all I do.

So now we begin the long goodbye to mystery men and feats of derring-do, villainous soliloquies and merry spandex. I really thought I'd read comics for the rest of my life.... Ah well, maybe I can p[ick it up again in ten years, when with a little luck the damage about to be inflicted will be being retconned out of existence. There's that elusive silver lining: nothing lasts forever, not even disaster.

The above is a mess, but I wanted to get some thoughts down on paper while the hurt and disappointment was still fresh. I had planned to write a comics column for The Newsletter this summer; now, I think perhaps it will be quite different than I had assumed. As in all things, time shall tell.