Science!
Hyperlink the First. Lunar Albion? Lunalbion? I can't believe it's taken the British this long to set their voracious sights on the Moon; after all, A Grand Day Out was made seventeen years ago! That Moon cheese is ours, you Limey bastards!

The War for Civilization
It was with much glee that I greeted the news of Ethiopia's military intervention on behalf of Somalia's provisional government. The Union of Islamic Courts aspired to do for Somalia what the Taleban had done for Afghanistan: bring an end to the chaos through ruthless tyranny. Furthering the comparison, the Islamic Courts are overly cozy with the local franchise of everyone's favorite laugh-a-minute pranksters, al Qaeda. So, hip hip hooray, the AC-130 rides again! Hyperlink the Second.

Spain gave in to al Qaeda's demands following the Madrid trains bombings in 2004; so, what possible incentive would ETA, the bloody Basque terrorist group, have to negotiate with the Spanish government? Kill just shy of 200 people in the nation's capital city and the cowardly Spaniards, the same lackeys who were only too willing to submit to Franco's fascist dictatorship, will do whatever you want. Madre de Dios, when will the Spaniards display that legendary machismo and stand up to those murderous Basque thugs? Hyperlink the Third.