Vote for Kodos
Red... as in Heinz Ketchup
Drat! Well, poo, this would have been so much fun. Well, still, well done, Swift Boat Vets. As fine a job of dirty tricks politicking as I've ever seen. (In part because I wass too young to appreciate the job Lee Atwater did for the first President Bush in '88.)

White... as in the White Feather
The following is exactly why I am a Republican: bullshit. If you want to oppose the war, that's both right and proper. Contrary to the myth the pinkos in the NEA try to impress upon the all-too impressionable youth of America, vehement disagreement, not bland consensus, is the key to a vigorous and prosperous democracy. I support the war because I supported the war in 2003; I thought going to war was the right decision, and what kind of a spineless nancy would I be if I changed my mind as soon as the going got tough? If you don't support the war, that's fine, too. You're wrong, but in America you are free to be as wrong as you want.

But to fund the war and in the same breath pass a purely symbolic resolution disagreeing with the war? Grant's Tomb, is this what the once proud party of Woodrow Wilson and Harry Truman has come to? If the Democrats are against the war, they should have the courage to pull the plug, to provide just enough funding for a chaotic and cowardly withdrawl from Iraq. You can't have it both ways. Is victory in Iraq important or unimportant? Pick a position, because these lily-livered half-measures do a grave disservice to the Republic.

Blue... as in "Blue State"
Fortunately for America, though certainly distressing for the gentleman in question, Senator Joseph Biden (D, Delaware) will never be President of the United States. So, my lovely lefties, whom do you favor as the Dems' presidential nominee in '08, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton (D, New York), Senator Barack Obama (D, Illinois), former Vice President Al Gore (D, Tennessee), or ***insert your own candidate here***?