Read this. It is brilliant, especially the first part. (Incidentally, Captain Malice, when are you going to submit something to The Newsletter?)

There is turmoil at The Newsletter. (Nice segue, don't you think?) The Plate has quite suddenly and quite unexpectedly tendered his resignation. But fear not, loyal readers, for I shall endure. Of paramount importance, The Newsletter shall endure! Remember Alfred Bester's The Stars My Destination, "He was one hundred and seventy days dying and not yet dead." While others are faithless, I remain The Last Angry Man. When all else fails, spite will make me persist.

I think that's enough melodrama for one night.

Apparently, The Plate resigned because... no, that can wait until things have played out a little bit, I think.

So, I was reading the Secret Base's archives from May 2002. Sweet fancy Moses, all I did was whine and bellyache about Never Girl! Bog below, why didn't anyone tell me I was so relentlessly tedious? It's amazing how much things have changed in just two and not quite a half years; I cannot vouch for anyone else, but I feel this blog is a much better read today than it was then. (WARNING: I make no apology for anything said in those earlier days and if you choose to investigate further, you do so at your own peril. Don't come whining to me later.) On the other hand, I was more emotionally wroght back then; in many ways, today I just seem numb. At the time, I was intensely in love with Never Girl. She was on the verge of moving to California for grad school, and I devastated. We'd reached a point where she knew I was in love with her, I knew she was not in love with me, and we were able to function as close friends. The idea of not seeing her regularly was most distressing, as much because of our friendship as because of the other thing. We've seen each other since, of course, and still trade frequent emails, but to this day I miss physically seeing her. I still love her as a dear friend, but as the cliche states I am no longer in love with her. But I miss my friend, and I sympathize with my younger self. Butr that doesn't mean he wasn't a whiny little twat. Blog something interesting, you toad! Nobnody wants to hear your witless treatises on unrequitted love. Man up.

Still, I miss his passion. Yes, he thought no one was reading, but still, he was far less censored than I am today. Discretion is the better part of valor? Load of dingo's kidneys, if you ask me.

Speaking of Australia (another wicked segue!), apparently The L.A.W. and her current boytoy are vacationing there in November. That's awesome. Of course, from a purely political point of view my sister is more New Zealand than she is Australia, but in good conscience I cannot endorse anyone travelling to New Zealand. The L.A.W. will, after this trip, have been to five of the six inhabited continents: North America, South America, Africa, Europe, and now Australia. Of course, her only trip to South America (Brazil, where my paternal grandparents lived at the time) was as a baby; so, that might not fully count. I have never left North America, but I have only myself to blame for this sorry state of affairs. Well, me and Colin Powell.

And yes, I still now and will always think it's freaky that my sister's initials are L.A.W. She is, of course, a lawyer.

H-A-N
Have a tasty night.
Mike is... Super Tasty