I think for Lent I'm going to give up all the real swear words: fuck, shit, bitch, and ass. Hell and damn, as well as the variations jackass and dumbass, will still be acceptable. Though cunt is just about the worst name you can call anyone, it isn't a swear word. And besides, I hardly ever use it; it's a weapon of last resort. Man, this is going to be a fucking pain in my ass. Ooo, the phrase "that just chaps my ass" will still be acceptable.
For each swear word that slips out, I have to say a Hail Mary. (If that doesn't work, I may have to up to a full Rosary.) I love being Catholic, it is such an ancient, bizarre faith.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 54
The best part about today it that it's divisible by six. My mustache is starting to bug me because it tickles me every time I take a drink from a can. Blast!
"Hail Mary, full of grace,
The Lord is with thee,
Blessed art thou among women
And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Christ Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners, now
And in the hour of our death."
Why in Bog's name is Adult Swim airing Christmas promos?
Est. 2002 | "This was a Golden Age, a time of high adventure, rich living, and hard dying… but nobody thought so." —Alfred Bester
Monday, February 23, 2004
Sunday, February 22, 2004
I'm looking at Dan the Man's first mock up of the new The Newsletter Online and, let me tell you, it looks fantastic. I could not be more pleased with how it's turning out.
Holy crap, Ash Wednesday is this week! Sweet fancy Moses, what am I going to give up? Pop? Chocolate? Certain swear words? You know what? (Are you mad? That's impossible!) Star Trek? AIM?
I love Ash Wednesday, by the way. If I had my druthers, I'd walk around every day with ashes smeared on my forehead. I feel so holy.
Holy crap, Ash Wednesday is this week! Sweet fancy Moses, what am I going to give up? Pop? Chocolate? Certain swear words? You know what? (Are you mad? That's impossible!) Star Trek? AIM?
I love Ash Wednesday, by the way. If I had my druthers, I'd walk around every day with ashes smeared on my forehead. I feel so holy.
Vote For Kodos
I have two contradictory thoughts about Ralph Nader. a) Run, Ralph, run! Because in the election to come, even the small number of votes Nader draws away from the Democrat, presumably Kerry, might just make the difference. b) I hate third parties. Do you know what third parties give us? Presidents elected by a minority of the voters. In 1992, Bill Clinton won 43% of the vote and was elected president; in 1988, Michael Dukakis garnered 45.6% of the vote, but was sent back to Massachusetts as a joke. The Electoral College is in the Constitution, it is how we elect our presidents. Nevertheless, it is better for our democracy for Electoral victory to coincide with numerical victory at the polls. Without Nader, Al Gore's numerical victory in 2000 would have translated into Electoral victory. Now, I believe it is a good thing that Gore did not win the presidency (especially, but not exclusively, in light of 9/11), but as a general rule third party candidates do not raise the level of the political discourse, they simply act as spoilers.
But, since Ralph is in and the latter point is thus moot, go, Ralph, go! As the comedian Pat Paulson said in his many "campaigns" for the presidency,"We're upped our standards, now up yours."
I have two contradictory thoughts about Ralph Nader. a) Run, Ralph, run! Because in the election to come, even the small number of votes Nader draws away from the Democrat, presumably Kerry, might just make the difference. b) I hate third parties. Do you know what third parties give us? Presidents elected by a minority of the voters. In 1992, Bill Clinton won 43% of the vote and was elected president; in 1988, Michael Dukakis garnered 45.6% of the vote, but was sent back to Massachusetts as a joke. The Electoral College is in the Constitution, it is how we elect our presidents. Nevertheless, it is better for our democracy for Electoral victory to coincide with numerical victory at the polls. Without Nader, Al Gore's numerical victory in 2000 would have translated into Electoral victory. Now, I believe it is a good thing that Gore did not win the presidency (especially, but not exclusively, in light of 9/11), but as a general rule third party candidates do not raise the level of the political discourse, they simply act as spoilers.
But, since Ralph is in and the latter point is thus moot, go, Ralph, go! As the comedian Pat Paulson said in his many "campaigns" for the presidency,"We're upped our standards, now up yours."
Saturday, February 21, 2004
Hey, Zach Nie! will like this: my Gunners now have a seven-point lead at the top of the Premiership, after the match with Chelsea: Arsenal 2, Chelsea 1. Your boys from Man U just can't compete without Becks. Ha!
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 52
I hate to admit it, but I think I do look older with the beard. Of course, that's not hard to do, since I dress so young: band T-shirt, chain on my wallet, skull-and-crossbones pin on my jacket. Still, when I'm forty and I've gone bald on top and my whiskers have turned gray, I think I'll have a pretty sweet looking beard.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 52
I hate to admit it, but I think I do look older with the beard. Of course, that's not hard to do, since I dress so young: band T-shirt, chain on my wallet, skull-and-crossbones pin on my jacket. Still, when I'm forty and I've gone bald on top and my whiskers have turned gray, I think I'll have a pretty sweet looking beard.
Friday, February 20, 2004
I am in a foul mood today. Nothing happened, I'm just feeling cross and belligerent. Adding insult to injury, it's fucking raining. In February. As amazing as January was, February has been that disappointing. Fucking rain.
And the fucking cat won't stop whining unless I let him up on my lap, but when I do that, he drools on the keyboard. Damn it, Sam, Mehmet the Conqueror won't be a whiny bitch like you. You can sit on my lap once I'm done using the HAL.
I've decided my speech needs to be more unique. Therefore, I'm going to start using my own words in place of the more commonly accepted term. First example, "HAL" instead of "computer." (I've never liked the word computer.)
FSWE
Saturday, April 24 at 8:00AM, the University of Michigan, Angell Hall. 8:00AM-3:00PM with one forty-five minute break. Wicked.
I feel somewhat better now, though it's still fucking raining. Blast!
And the fucking cat won't stop whining unless I let him up on my lap, but when I do that, he drools on the keyboard. Damn it, Sam, Mehmet the Conqueror won't be a whiny bitch like you. You can sit on my lap once I'm done using the HAL.
I've decided my speech needs to be more unique. Therefore, I'm going to start using my own words in place of the more commonly accepted term. First example, "HAL" instead of "computer." (I've never liked the word computer.)
FSWE
Saturday, April 24 at 8:00AM, the University of Michigan, Angell Hall. 8:00AM-3:00PM with one forty-five minute break. Wicked.
I feel somewhat better now, though it's still fucking raining. Blast!
Thursday, February 19, 2004
"Now is the winter of our discontent."
"Oh, no! Run!"
It's disgustingly warm outside, upwards of forty degrees. All the ice in the driveway has finally melted, the snow is receeding on the lawn. This is awful. January was the most perfect month I have ever experienced: relentless snow, ice, and temperatures that never ventured north of the low twenties, and rarely above the low teens. It was heavenly. Now, the only thing to do is scoff in disgust and contemplate a move to northernmost Ontario, maybe Greenland.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 50
Two awful developments: last night for the first time I got food in my mustache. How revolting. Also, the Mountain has trimmed his beard! What the fuck is that?! The whole point of growing your beard from one specific point to another specific point is to see how long it gets in that time period. If my aim was to grow a beard to the point where it needed to be trimmed, I would have done so weeks ago. Gah, if he's going to trim the damn thing what's the point of growing it for almost three months? He could have started in late January and still had plenty of time to get it to the appropriate length. Well, at least I will keep the faith with this debacle.
I love everything about MxPx's The Renaissance EP, except the fact that it's an EP, not a full-length album (total length: 18 minutes, 9 seconds; being MxPx, that means it is nine songs long). "Yuri Wakes Up Screaming."
The Politics of The Newsletter
Never Girl receives The Newsletter (a huge strike against her is that she does not appreciate it as much as most of my friends). In any event, since she co-habitates with Never Boy I addressed the envelope to "Never Girl & Never Boy." This is standard operating procedure for non-married co-habitating couples. However, she emailed me today, asking if the inclusion of Never Boy's name on the envelope had been some sort of calculated move on my part. Sorry to disappoint, my dear, but the sun and the moon do not revolve solely around you. When it comes to The Newsletter, nobody is more special than anybody else... except Zooey Deschanel.
"Oh, no! Run!"
It's disgustingly warm outside, upwards of forty degrees. All the ice in the driveway has finally melted, the snow is receeding on the lawn. This is awful. January was the most perfect month I have ever experienced: relentless snow, ice, and temperatures that never ventured north of the low twenties, and rarely above the low teens. It was heavenly. Now, the only thing to do is scoff in disgust and contemplate a move to northernmost Ontario, maybe Greenland.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 50
Two awful developments: last night for the first time I got food in my mustache. How revolting. Also, the Mountain has trimmed his beard! What the fuck is that?! The whole point of growing your beard from one specific point to another specific point is to see how long it gets in that time period. If my aim was to grow a beard to the point where it needed to be trimmed, I would have done so weeks ago. Gah, if he's going to trim the damn thing what's the point of growing it for almost three months? He could have started in late January and still had plenty of time to get it to the appropriate length. Well, at least I will keep the faith with this debacle.
I love everything about MxPx's The Renaissance EP, except the fact that it's an EP, not a full-length album (total length: 18 minutes, 9 seconds; being MxPx, that means it is nine songs long). "Yuri Wakes Up Screaming."
The Politics of The Newsletter
Never Girl receives The Newsletter (a huge strike against her is that she does not appreciate it as much as most of my friends). In any event, since she co-habitates with Never Boy I addressed the envelope to "Never Girl & Never Boy." This is standard operating procedure for non-married co-habitating couples. However, she emailed me today, asking if the inclusion of Never Boy's name on the envelope had been some sort of calculated move on my part. Sorry to disappoint, my dear, but the sun and the moon do not revolve solely around you. When it comes to The Newsletter, nobody is more special than anybody else... except Zooey Deschanel.
Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Hee hee, funny story. The Mountain of Love has not yet received his copy of The Newsletter. The Mountain of Love is freaking out about not yet receiving his copy of The Newsletter. He is seriously pissed. Checking up on a bad gut feeling I had about this, it seems that I mailed his copy to an address at which he's never lived, an amalgamation of his current and previous addresses. Hee hee. Am I the only one who thinks this is funny? Ho boy, he's not going to be very pleased with me when I drive him to the airport tomorrow. Nuts.
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
Last night, before I went to bed I watched Big Trouble. Not only is it a hilarious movie, but I shall forever be indebted to it. For you see, before Big Trouble, I had never heard of Ms. Deschanel. To Dave Barry, who wrote the book, and Barry Sonnenfeld, who directed the movie: thanks, guys, I owe you (and please forgive the pun) big time.
Zooey Deschanel as I first saw her, seen here with Ben Foster. (I like this promo shot better than any of the screen captures.)
Vote For Kodos
Dammit dammit dammit dammit dammit, why couldn't Deanie have waited until he had secured the nomination to meltdown? Dammit. Oh, well. You know what I don't get? Open primaries. I mean, we have them here in Michigan, but I don't understand them. Yes, they open up the primaries to more people and more perspectives, but doesn't that defeat the purpose of the primary process? Don't we have general elections to see what everybody thinks? Aren't primaries supposed to be about each candidate whoring himself out to his party's fringe? Republicans run right and scare the crap out of everybody, Democrats run left and make Mike Dukakis look conservative. That's the point, isn't it? But, hey, what do I know? I'll tell you what I know, yesterday's Wisconsin primary was open and Sen. Edwards beat the living snot out of Sen. Kerry among Republican and independent voters, exactly the kind of voters Kerry will need to woo in the general election. Sweet.
Babar, King of the Elephants
President George W. Bush of Texas
Donkey Punch
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"The Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters*
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Senator Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
*For the first time, the quitters now outnumber those still in the race.
Last night, before I went to bed I watched Big Trouble. Not only is it a hilarious movie, but I shall forever be indebted to it. For you see, before Big Trouble, I had never heard of Ms. Deschanel. To Dave Barry, who wrote the book, and Barry Sonnenfeld, who directed the movie: thanks, guys, I owe you (and please forgive the pun) big time.
Zooey Deschanel as I first saw her, seen here with Ben Foster. (I like this promo shot better than any of the screen captures.)
Vote For Kodos
Dammit dammit dammit dammit dammit, why couldn't Deanie have waited until he had secured the nomination to meltdown? Dammit. Oh, well. You know what I don't get? Open primaries. I mean, we have them here in Michigan, but I don't understand them. Yes, they open up the primaries to more people and more perspectives, but doesn't that defeat the purpose of the primary process? Don't we have general elections to see what everybody thinks? Aren't primaries supposed to be about each candidate whoring himself out to his party's fringe? Republicans run right and scare the crap out of everybody, Democrats run left and make Mike Dukakis look conservative. That's the point, isn't it? But, hey, what do I know? I'll tell you what I know, yesterday's Wisconsin primary was open and Sen. Edwards beat the living snot out of Sen. Kerry among Republican and independent voters, exactly the kind of voters Kerry will need to woo in the general election. Sweet.
Babar, King of the Elephants
President George W. Bush of Texas
Donkey Punch
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"The Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters*
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Senator Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
*For the first time, the quitters now outnumber those still in the race.
Tuesday, February 17, 2004
"Korea is so far away,
Korea is so far away,
And this is my special friend
We'd meet secretly in the park
And wonder why
We couldn't share ourselves.
Korea is so, it's so far away,
Oh, I want to share
My round-eyed devil with you,
And she's not so different
From you."
--Mike Park, "Korea Is So Far Away"
Mike Park is the founder of the world's most amazing record label, Asian Man Records. Mu330, Potshot, Johnny Socko, Korea Girl, The Chinkees, Alkaline Trio*, The Lawrence Arms, the list goes on and on. On Asian Man, there is something for everybody.
One day, I was walking down the street wearing my Asian Man Records T-shirt; the logo of Asian Man is a red/blue yin-yang, with "Asian Man Records" written below in English and "Asian Man" written above in Korean. As I approached a man - a middle-aged Asian man - I could see him reading my shirt. Just before we passed each other, I saw his face break into a large smile. Thanks, Asian Man, for helping me make an Asian man's day!
The worst part about not having any money is falling behind in my collecting of Asian Man albums.
*Alkaline Trio is okay. They aren't great. I'd worship them forever, though, if they subtlely altered their name to the Al Kaline Trio. The Plate first called that possibility to my attention. I don't care much for baseball, but that would be awesome.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 48
Nothing much to report, except I'd really, really like to shave.
Korea is so far away,
And this is my special friend
We'd meet secretly in the park
And wonder why
We couldn't share ourselves.
Korea is so, it's so far away,
Oh, I want to share
My round-eyed devil with you,
And she's not so different
From you."
--Mike Park, "Korea Is So Far Away"
Mike Park is the founder of the world's most amazing record label, Asian Man Records. Mu330, Potshot, Johnny Socko, Korea Girl, The Chinkees, Alkaline Trio*, The Lawrence Arms, the list goes on and on. On Asian Man, there is something for everybody.
One day, I was walking down the street wearing my Asian Man Records T-shirt; the logo of Asian Man is a red/blue yin-yang, with "Asian Man Records" written below in English and "Asian Man" written above in Korean. As I approached a man - a middle-aged Asian man - I could see him reading my shirt. Just before we passed each other, I saw his face break into a large smile. Thanks, Asian Man, for helping me make an Asian man's day!
The worst part about not having any money is falling behind in my collecting of Asian Man albums.
*Alkaline Trio is okay. They aren't great. I'd worship them forever, though, if they subtlely altered their name to the Al Kaline Trio. The Plate first called that possibility to my attention. I don't care much for baseball, but that would be awesome.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 48
Nothing much to report, except I'd really, really like to shave.
National Public Radio
Holy balls! I know it was a rerun (apparently, from some time in December), but Sarah Vowell was on tonight's Late Night! Sarah Vowell! Holy crap! I didn't know they let NPR folks leave the building, much less actually go out in front of people and give interviews. This is amazing. A whole new world is opening up. Ira Glass on The Late Show. Daniel Schorr on Nightline. Michelle Norris hosting Saturday Night Live. Michael Feldman on Face the Nation.
Today, Conan; tomorrow, the world.
Holy balls! I know it was a rerun (apparently, from some time in December), but Sarah Vowell was on tonight's Late Night! Sarah Vowell! Holy crap! I didn't know they let NPR folks leave the building, much less actually go out in front of people and give interviews. This is amazing. A whole new world is opening up. Ira Glass on The Late Show. Daniel Schorr on Nightline. Michelle Norris hosting Saturday Night Live. Michael Feldman on Face the Nation.
Today, Conan; tomorrow, the world.
Monday, February 16, 2004
Professional Sports Teams in New York City
Baseball
New York Yankees
New York Mets
Football
New York Giants (actually play in New Jersey)
New York Jets (actually play in New Jersey)
Basketball
New York Knicks
Hockey
New York Rangers
Professional Sports Teams I Hate in New York City
Baseball
New York Yankees
New York Mets
Football
New York Giants (pretty much only because they play in Jersey, fucking liars)
New York Jets (they share the same stadium; so, the same venom)
Basketball
New York Knicks (though I am amused that the original Knickerbockers were all white, Jewish guys)
Hockey
Noo Yawk Ranjahs
As Greg Kinnear used to say as the original host of Talk Soup, "Coincidence? I think not."
Interestingly, I also hate both named New Jersey teams, the New Jersey Devils (NHL) and New Jersey Nets (NBA). I hate the Devils because of what they did to the Wings in '95; I hate the Nets because they have the absolute worst name in professional sports. The Nets?! That's like a football team calling themselves the End Zones or a baseball team called the Home Plates. Jesumaria, how do those people sleep at night? I fucking hate Jersey.
Baseball
New York Yankees
New York Mets
Football
New York Giants (actually play in New Jersey)
New York Jets (actually play in New Jersey)
Basketball
New York Knicks
Hockey
New York Rangers
Professional Sports Teams I Hate in New York City
Baseball
New York Yankees
New York Mets
Football
New York Giants (pretty much only because they play in Jersey, fucking liars)
New York Jets (they share the same stadium; so, the same venom)
Basketball
New York Knicks (though I am amused that the original Knickerbockers were all white, Jewish guys)
Hockey
Noo Yawk Ranjahs
As Greg Kinnear used to say as the original host of Talk Soup, "Coincidence? I think not."
Interestingly, I also hate both named New Jersey teams, the New Jersey Devils (NHL) and New Jersey Nets (NBA). I hate the Devils because of what they did to the Wings in '95; I hate the Nets because they have the absolute worst name in professional sports. The Nets?! That's like a football team calling themselves the End Zones or a baseball team called the Home Plates. Jesumaria, how do those people sleep at night? I fucking hate Jersey.
"Baby, baby, baby,
Come on, what's wrong?
It's a radiation vibe I'm grooving on,
Don't it make you want to get some sun?
Shine on, shine on, shine on."
--Fountains of Wayne, "Radiation Vibe" from Fountains of Wayne
Prime Minister's Questions, now that's government!
"When you have shot and killed a man you have in some measure clarified your attitude toward him. You have given a definite answer to a definite problem. For better or worse you have acted decisively. In a way, the next move it up to him."
--R.A. Lafferty
Come on, what's wrong?
It's a radiation vibe I'm grooving on,
Don't it make you want to get some sun?
Shine on, shine on, shine on."
--Fountains of Wayne, "Radiation Vibe" from Fountains of Wayne
Prime Minister's Questions, now that's government!
"When you have shot and killed a man you have in some measure clarified your attitude toward him. You have given a definite answer to a definite problem. For better or worse you have acted decisively. In a way, the next move it up to him."
--R.A. Lafferty
Sunday, February 15, 2004
*sigh* Cat, we've had this discussion before. Whining for me to pet you will do you no good if you continue to stand out of reach.
In other feline news, my sister has named her new kitten Natasha. Natasha? Gah, she could have at least tried.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 46
The most positive thing I can say now is that there are fewer days ahead than there are behind. You know the 17th century mustache-imperial combination? I've got that going on pretty nicely; so, I'm going to keep the imperial once the BBB converts to the Massive Mustache Mistake (for only an additional week). Or maybe I'll abort the MMM. In any event, I'm not going to shave off my imperial for a long time.
In other feline news, my sister has named her new kitten Natasha. Natasha? Gah, she could have at least tried.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 46
The most positive thing I can say now is that there are fewer days ahead than there are behind. You know the 17th century mustache-imperial combination? I've got that going on pretty nicely; so, I'm going to keep the imperial once the BBB converts to the Massive Mustache Mistake (for only an additional week). Or maybe I'll abort the MMM. In any event, I'm not going to shave off my imperial for a long time.
Saturday, February 14, 2004
Star Trek: Enterprise
Enterprise NX-01
Captain Jonathan Archer
Star Trek
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701
Captain James T. Kirk
Star Trek - movies
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-A
Admiral/Captain James T. Kirk
Star Trek: The Next Generation
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-D
Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Star Trek: The Next Generation - movies
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-E
Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Starbase Deep Space 9/U.S.S. Defiant NX-74205
Captain Benjamin Sisko
Star Trek: Voyager
U.S.S. Voyager NCC-74656
Captain Kathryn Janeway
Enterprise NX-01
Captain Jonathan Archer
Star Trek
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701
Captain James T. Kirk
Star Trek - movies
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-A
Admiral/Captain James T. Kirk
Star Trek: The Next Generation
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-D
Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Star Trek: The Next Generation - movies
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-E
Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Starbase Deep Space 9/U.S.S. Defiant NX-74205
Captain Benjamin Sisko
Star Trek: Voyager
U.S.S. Voyager NCC-74656
Captain Kathryn Janeway
S-I-S-I yo
And on the cover of this year's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, and it's about damn time, Veronica Varekova! I can't believe she's marrying that chump Petr Nedved, though. Come on, he's Nedved! He's a "Noo Yawk Ranjah"! You can do better! (Hey, which Red Wings are single...?)
Enjoy your Valentine's Day, Petr... you bastard.
And on the cover of this year's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, and it's about damn time, Veronica Varekova! I can't believe she's marrying that chump Petr Nedved, though. Come on, he's Nedved! He's a "Noo Yawk Ranjah"! You can do better! (Hey, which Red Wings are single...?)
Enjoy your Valentine's Day, Petr... you bastard.
Friday, February 13, 2004
V'tosh ka'tur, "Vulcans without logic."
Also, this is pretty sweet. It's a 22nd century Tholian vessel, and I hope to be seeing much more it it in the future.
Also, this is pretty sweet. It's a 22nd century Tholian vessel, and I hope to be seeing much more it it in the future.
Vote For Kodos
VETERANS ALWAYS WIN
That's why George Bush, the youngest naval aviator of the Second World War, who was shot down by the Japanese at least once, easily defeated Bill Clinton in 1992.
That's also why Bob Dole, who spend years in military hospitals recovering from wounds received fighting the Nazi war machine - losing the use of his right arm - handily defeated Bill Clinton in 1996.
Oh, wait.
The Elephant
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Jackassess
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"The Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
As we have seen, the endorsement of Vice President Gore has turned out to be absolutely vital in this campaign season. Why oh why couldn't Deanie have imploded some time in April?
VETERANS ALWAYS WIN
That's why George Bush, the youngest naval aviator of the Second World War, who was shot down by the Japanese at least once, easily defeated Bill Clinton in 1992.
That's also why Bob Dole, who spend years in military hospitals recovering from wounds received fighting the Nazi war machine - losing the use of his right arm - handily defeated Bill Clinton in 1996.
Oh, wait.
The Elephant
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Jackassess
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"The Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
As we have seen, the endorsement of Vice President Gore has turned out to be absolutely vital in this campaign season. Why oh why couldn't Deanie have imploded some time in April?
Voe For Kodos: Special Holy Shit Edition
John Kerry, speaking before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, 1971:
In the course of the Vietnam War, American soldiers "had personally raped, cut off ears, cut off heads, taped wires from portable telephones to human genitals and turned up the power, cut off limbs, blown up bodies, randomly shot at civilians, razed villages in a fashion reminiscent of Genghis Khan, shot cattle and dogs for fun, poisoned food stocks, and generally ravaged the countryside of South Vietnam in addition to the normal ravage of war, and the normal and very particular ravaging which is done by the applied bombing power of this country."
I used to just disagree with Kerry's politics, but this, this is beyond the pale. I loathe Oliver North. Why? Because he lied to Congress. Whatever the faults of individual congressmen and senators, and they are legion, the Congress as an institution acts as the tribune of the American people. I can image few greater crimes than lying under oath to the Congress. John Kerry, in testimony under oath, lied to the Congress. This fact has been glossed over because his lies were about Vietnam, not Iran-Contra. I for one see little difference. I would be a hypocrite if I loathed Lt. Col. North without also loathing Sen. Kerry. Thus, I personally loathe John Forbes Kerry.
John Kerry, speaking before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, 1971:
In the course of the Vietnam War, American soldiers "had personally raped, cut off ears, cut off heads, taped wires from portable telephones to human genitals and turned up the power, cut off limbs, blown up bodies, randomly shot at civilians, razed villages in a fashion reminiscent of Genghis Khan, shot cattle and dogs for fun, poisoned food stocks, and generally ravaged the countryside of South Vietnam in addition to the normal ravage of war, and the normal and very particular ravaging which is done by the applied bombing power of this country."
I used to just disagree with Kerry's politics, but this, this is beyond the pale. I loathe Oliver North. Why? Because he lied to Congress. Whatever the faults of individual congressmen and senators, and they are legion, the Congress as an institution acts as the tribune of the American people. I can image few greater crimes than lying under oath to the Congress. John Kerry, in testimony under oath, lied to the Congress. This fact has been glossed over because his lies were about Vietnam, not Iran-Contra. I for one see little difference. I would be a hypocrite if I loathed Lt. Col. North without also loathing Sen. Kerry. Thus, I personally loathe John Forbes Kerry.
Baddest Zeon mobile suit pilot:
Char Aznable or Anavel Gato?
Baddest Feddie non-Newtype mobile suit pilot:
Kou Uraki or Shiro Amada?
Char would best Gato, but it isn't really fair since Char is a Newtype. Gato in an MS-14 Gelgoog versus Shiro in his RX-79[G] Ez-8 Gundam, that would be a fight for the ages. The Ez-8 rules.
Bueno Suerte
My brother has his U of M grad school audition today. I hope it goes well. Next week he has an audition for Florida State. I want him to get into Michigan both so that he will still be nearby and becasue I wouldn't wish residency in Tallahassee on my worst enemy. Okay, okay, actually I would wish it on my worst enemy, but I am rather fond of my brother and so would not wish it upon him.
"It's your own worst enemy, ringing the bell..."
Banzao Beard Bonanza: Day 44
I've decided to go shaggy. Many have urged me to trim the wildest, furtherest back sections of my beard (bellow and in front of the ear, for instance, where it is exceedingly curly and unruly and the two small incursions away form the lower jaw onto the neck). But no! The point of this debalce is to be a debacle, and I'm not going to moderate the plan now that it had begun to produce such fabulously awful dividends.
Char Aznable or Anavel Gato?
Baddest Feddie non-Newtype mobile suit pilot:
Kou Uraki or Shiro Amada?
Char would best Gato, but it isn't really fair since Char is a Newtype. Gato in an MS-14 Gelgoog versus Shiro in his RX-79[G] Ez-8 Gundam, that would be a fight for the ages. The Ez-8 rules.
Bueno Suerte
My brother has his U of M grad school audition today. I hope it goes well. Next week he has an audition for Florida State. I want him to get into Michigan both so that he will still be nearby and becasue I wouldn't wish residency in Tallahassee on my worst enemy. Okay, okay, actually I would wish it on my worst enemy, but I am rather fond of my brother and so would not wish it upon him.
"It's your own worst enemy, ringing the bell..."
Banzao Beard Bonanza: Day 44
I've decided to go shaggy. Many have urged me to trim the wildest, furtherest back sections of my beard (bellow and in front of the ear, for instance, where it is exceedingly curly and unruly and the two small incursions away form the lower jaw onto the neck). But no! The point of this debalce is to be a debacle, and I'm not going to moderate the plan now that it had begun to produce such fabulously awful dividends.
Wednesday, February 11, 2004
Tuesday, February 10, 2004
Xenophon
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75401
Captain Petho Mentar - Commanding Officer (Pic)
Lieutenant Shrev - Executive Officer (Andorian)
Lieutenant T'Phar - Chief Engineering Officer (Vulcan)
Lieutenant Lurin Reza - Chief of Security/Tactical Officer (Betazoid)
Doctor (Lt. j.g.) Mea 8 - Chief Medical Officer (Eminian)
Lieutenant (j.g.) Po - Operations/Conn Officer (Bolian)
Ensign Aina Chaffee - Science Officer (human)
Lieutenant (j.g.) Feras - Security Officer (Bolian)
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75401
Captain Petho Mentar - Commanding Officer (Pic)
Lieutenant Shrev - Executive Officer (Andorian)
Lieutenant T'Phar - Chief Engineering Officer (Vulcan)
Lieutenant Lurin Reza - Chief of Security/Tactical Officer (Betazoid)
Doctor (Lt. j.g.) Mea 8 - Chief Medical Officer (Eminian)
Lieutenant (j.g.) Po - Operations/Conn Officer (Bolian)
Ensign Aina Chaffee - Science Officer (human)
Lieutenant (j.g.) Feras - Security Officer (Bolian)
Monday, February 9, 2004
Who had the best honorific? strikes back
Skeeter brought to my attention that I missed at least one crucial honoific: Vlad the Impaler. He may have been a bloodthirsty maniac, but that jerk knew how to get noticed.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 40
Well, at least there is some good news: I buzzed my hair yesterday; so, the hair on my head is now shorter than the hair on my face. Woo and hoo. I don't know if I have to give anything up for Lent this year; after all, this particular sacrifice is going to last a lot longer than forty days.
Skeeter brought to my attention that I missed at least one crucial honoific: Vlad the Impaler. He may have been a bloodthirsty maniac, but that jerk knew how to get noticed.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 40
Well, at least there is some good news: I buzzed my hair yesterday; so, the hair on my head is now shorter than the hair on my face. Woo and hoo. I don't know if I have to give anything up for Lent this year; after all, this particular sacrifice is going to last a lot longer than forty days.
Who had the best honorific?
Alexander the Great*
Charles Martel (meaning "the Hammer")
Richard the Lion-Hearted
Mehmet the Conquerer**
Sulieman the Magnificent
Ivan the Terrible
The clear all-time winner is William the Conquerer, not for that title, but for his original honorific: William the Bastard
*also Peter the Great, Catherine the Great, Frederick the Great; so, hardly unique
**also William the Conquerer
Alexander the Great*
Charles Martel (meaning "the Hammer")
Richard the Lion-Hearted
Mehmet the Conquerer**
Sulieman the Magnificent
Ivan the Terrible
The clear all-time winner is William the Conquerer, not for that title, but for his original honorific: William the Bastard
*also Peter the Great, Catherine the Great, Frederick the Great; so, hardly unique
**also William the Conquerer
Sunday, February 8, 2004
Vote For Kodos
In 1988, just before the July conventions, Governor Dukakis lead then-Vice President Bush in the polls by 18%. And that George Bush didn't have Karl Rove. I still wish John McCain had been the Republican nominee in 2000, but I digress. There are many valid reasons to not want George W. Bush to be reelected as president, but I'm sorry, kids, that's just not going to happen. Once the Republican legions march to war, it will take a better man than John Kerry to stop them... I mean, us.
In 1988, just before the July conventions, Governor Dukakis lead then-Vice President Bush in the polls by 18%. And that George Bush didn't have Karl Rove. I still wish John McCain had been the Republican nominee in 2000, but I digress. There are many valid reasons to not want George W. Bush to be reelected as president, but I'm sorry, kids, that's just not going to happen. Once the Republican legions march to war, it will take a better man than John Kerry to stop them... I mean, us.
This Summer, a Group of Eight summit is being held on a small island off the Georgia coast, Sea Island. Sea Island, huh, how about that. Are you people fucking retarded! Sea fucking Island? As opposed to what other kind of island, Perched Precariously On a Mountain Top Island?! Surrounded On All Sides By a Thousand Miles of Desert Island?! Welcome to Kansas Island?! For fuck's sake, just try! Why is it so hard for peole to just try?
In other news, Spies Like Us is on. I love this movie. You'll notice that in the beginning Dan Aykroyd's and Chevy Chase's characters meet while taking the foreign service exam. If within twenty-four hours of my exam I am being shot at by Bernie Casey, I will be one happy boy.
In other news, Spies Like Us is on. I love this movie. You'll notice that in the beginning Dan Aykroyd's and Chevy Chase's characters meet while taking the foreign service exam. If within twenty-four hours of my exam I am being shot at by Bernie Casey, I will be one happy boy.
The Former Yugoslavia
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Croatia
Macedonia
Montenegro
Serbia
Slovenia
and, because I can...
Europe - 2004
United Kingdom (England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland)
Ireland
Iceland
Norway
Denmark
Finland
Sweden
Belgium
The Netherlands
Luxombourg
Liechtenstein
France
Germany
Italy
San Marino
Vatican City
Spain
Portugal
Andorra
Malta
Monaco
Austria
Switzerland
Poland
Czech Republic
Slovakia
Hungary
Romania
Bulgaria
Albania
Slovenia
Croatia
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Serbia and Montenegro
Macedonia
Greece
Turkey
Cyprus
Moldava
Ukraine
Belarus
Latvia
Lithuania
Estonia
Russia
Let's see you do better from memory. Someone bring me an unlabelled map!
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Croatia
Macedonia
Montenegro
Serbia
Slovenia
and, because I can...
Europe - 2004
United Kingdom (England, Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland)
Ireland
Iceland
Norway
Denmark
Finland
Sweden
Belgium
The Netherlands
Luxombourg
Liechtenstein
France
Germany
Italy
San Marino
Vatican City
Spain
Portugal
Andorra
Malta
Monaco
Austria
Switzerland
Poland
Czech Republic
Slovakia
Hungary
Romania
Bulgaria
Albania
Slovenia
Croatia
Bosnia and Herzegovina
Serbia and Montenegro
Macedonia
Greece
Turkey
Cyprus
Moldava
Ukraine
Belarus
Latvia
Lithuania
Estonia
Russia
Let's see you do better from memory. Someone bring me an unlabelled map!
U.S.S. Warspite NCC-75757
Galaxy-class
Captain Julius Augustus Seneca - Commanding Officer
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75401
Defiant-class
Captain Pethlo Mentar - Commanding Officer
Vote For Kodos
The Grand Old Party
President George W. Bush of Texas
No Organized Political Party
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters
Senator Joe "Joe-mentum" Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Dick Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
People always ask me if I'm thinking about volunteering to work on a political campaign. I fail to understand why. Do people understand how disgusting a process American elections are? Scrambling for votes; kowtowing to petty, parochial intersts; pretending to give a damn about John Q. Public's opinion; always, always, always begging for money. I love America, and following Churchill's reasoning, I have great faith in democracy, but the actual business of politicking is a sickening enterprise. Tip O'Neill was absolutely right when he said, "All politics is local." Local concerns would b those I dismiss as petty and parochial; so, no, at this point I have no interest in participating in any campaigns.
A quick note: much has been made in the media of former Treasury secretary Paul O'Neil's book The Price of Loyalty. First of all, I love the title. O'Neil was known for making statements that did not jive with nor support administration positions. If he wants to speak his mind, that's fine, but as long as he was Secretary of the Treasury, he had a duty to defend the positions of his President. He could disagree with the President, but not in public. Senor O'Neill certainly has a bizarre concept of "loyalty." Secondly, much has been made of the fact that the Bush Administration was trying to find a way to get rid of Saddam Hussein since day 1. Well, gee, since regime change in Baghdad had been U.S. government policy since the Clinton Administration, wouldn't it make sense for the new administration to figure out a way to, I don't know, change the regime? I wish I could be a Democrat and blissfully ignore the inconvenience of the truth.
Galaxy-class
Captain Julius Augustus Seneca - Commanding Officer
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75401
Defiant-class
Captain Pethlo Mentar - Commanding Officer
Vote For Kodos
The Grand Old Party
President George W. Bush of Texas
No Organized Political Party
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
"Reverend" Al Sharpton of New York
the quitters
Senator Joe "Joe-mentum" Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Dick Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
People always ask me if I'm thinking about volunteering to work on a political campaign. I fail to understand why. Do people understand how disgusting a process American elections are? Scrambling for votes; kowtowing to petty, parochial intersts; pretending to give a damn about John Q. Public's opinion; always, always, always begging for money. I love America, and following Churchill's reasoning, I have great faith in democracy, but the actual business of politicking is a sickening enterprise. Tip O'Neill was absolutely right when he said, "All politics is local." Local concerns would b those I dismiss as petty and parochial; so, no, at this point I have no interest in participating in any campaigns.
A quick note: much has been made in the media of former Treasury secretary Paul O'Neil's book The Price of Loyalty. First of all, I love the title. O'Neil was known for making statements that did not jive with nor support administration positions. If he wants to speak his mind, that's fine, but as long as he was Secretary of the Treasury, he had a duty to defend the positions of his President. He could disagree with the President, but not in public. Senor O'Neill certainly has a bizarre concept of "loyalty." Secondly, much has been made of the fact that the Bush Administration was trying to find a way to get rid of Saddam Hussein since day 1. Well, gee, since regime change in Baghdad had been U.S. government policy since the Clinton Administration, wouldn't it make sense for the new administration to figure out a way to, I don't know, change the regime? I wish I could be a Democrat and blissfully ignore the inconvenience of the truth.
Saturday, February 7, 2004
First of all, learning is awesome. Because of learning, I can now speak intelligently to whom Xenophon was, as well as tell you who the Ten Thousand were and why they are remembered as the Ten Thousand. I've even learned enough to know that Xenophon would be an excellent name for a Defiant-class starship, specifically Pethlo Mentar's Defiant-class ship.
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75197
U.S.S. Xenophon NCC-75197
Proud Ilium
This summer's coming blockbuster, Troy, is going to be fucking awesome. I mean no disrespect to the Lord or the sacrifice He made, but it is The Iliad not the Passion - and note that I very much want to see The Passion of the Christ - that is the greatest story ever told. The Passion is a tragedy and its consequences are far-reaching - the potential salvation of the souls of the entire human race - but in the end it is a story about one man's sacrifice, one noble act. The Iliad is a story about thousands of acts of noble sacrifice and seflish acts of base cowardice, loyalty, betrayal, war, sex, religion, folly, triumph, and massacre. It is the most human story ever written. The Passion is about one extraordinary, indeed divine, man; The Iliad is about all of us.
What's both right and wrong about our culture is that we are unwilling to launch a thousand ships over a single woman, no matter how beautiful.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 38
Ugh, today I just want to be rid of this accursed thing. I want to look like myself again.
This summer's coming blockbuster, Troy, is going to be fucking awesome. I mean no disrespect to the Lord or the sacrifice He made, but it is The Iliad not the Passion - and note that I very much want to see The Passion of the Christ - that is the greatest story ever told. The Passion is a tragedy and its consequences are far-reaching - the potential salvation of the souls of the entire human race - but in the end it is a story about one man's sacrifice, one noble act. The Iliad is a story about thousands of acts of noble sacrifice and seflish acts of base cowardice, loyalty, betrayal, war, sex, religion, folly, triumph, and massacre. It is the most human story ever written. The Passion is about one extraordinary, indeed divine, man; The Iliad is about all of us.
What's both right and wrong about our culture is that we are unwilling to launch a thousand ships over a single woman, no matter how beautiful.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 38
Ugh, today I just want to be rid of this accursed thing. I want to look like myself again.
Friday, February 6, 2004
I know it wasn't an award from an informed source, like ESPN, but still. The World News Tonight with Peter Jennings "Person of the Week" this week is Adam Vinatieri, the kicker for the Super Bowl champion New England Patriots. Excuse me? Yeah, he kicked a last minutes field goal to win the Super Bowl, but he only had to do that because HE MISSED TWO FIELD GOALS EARLIER IN THE GAME! For that game, he was 1-2,. That's one of three! If he'd made those earlier two field goals, the third would not have been necessary and the Patriots would have won 35-29, 38-29 if they'd gone for th last second field goal anyway. Great Caesar's ghost, if a man does he job one time out of three he's considered a hero now? Ye gods, what is this, baseball?
Skeeter will hate this entire post.
UNIFORM CODE
Wherein I will discuss the uniform traditions of Star Trek, especially with an eye on how the various traditions were combined in the prequel series Star Trek: Enterprise. This discussion will not include the original series movies, as both styles of uniforms represented therein followed entirely different color and rank insignia schemes.
{23rd Century - Star Trek (the original series)}
Colors
Gold really more of a greenish yellow - Command, Navigation
Red - Engineering, Security, Communications, JAG
Blue - Medical, Sciences
Ranks
For officers, ranks were determined by shiny gold stripes on the lower sleeves. Ensigns and crewman both had blank sleeves.
Commodore - two solid stripes with a gold field between
Fleet Captain mentioned, but no uniform was ever seen
Captain - solid stripe, dashed stripe, solid stripe
Commander - two solid stripes
Lieutenant Commander - solid stripe, dashed stripe
Lieutenant - one solid stripe
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one dashed stripe this is a conjectural guess
**********
{24th Century - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Voyager}
Colors
Red - Command, Navigation, JAG
Gold - Engineering, Operations, Security
Essentially, the roles of gold and red were reversed, though JAG (Judge Advocate General, legal services) stayed red, thus becoming more of a command function, which seems logical.
Blue - Medical Sciences, Communication
Ranks
Officers ranks were determined by round pips displayed on the collar. Enlisted crewmen for the most part had no rank insignia. The system of gold and black pips is identical to the system of full- and half-stripes emplyed by the United States Navy in the real world, with the exception of the admirals.
Fleet Admiral - four gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
Admiral - three gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
Vice Admiral - two gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
By the 24th century, the title of Commodore had lamentably disappeared from Starfleet.
Captain - four gold pips
Commander - three gold pips
Lieutenant Commander - two gold pips, one black pip
Lieutenant - two gold pips
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one gold pip, one black pip
Ensign - one gold pip
Chief Petty Officer no positive identification
For the last four seasons of DS9 Chief O'Brien's collar featured a gray patch at which we never got a terribly good look.
Senior Chief Specialist - one black pip
This arrangement was seen on various transporter operators referred to as "chief" and also Chief O'Brien at the time he was identified as a Senior Chief Specialist.
**********
{22nd Century - Star Trek: Enterprise}
At the time of the adventures of Captain Archer and his crew, the Federation - which Captains Kirk, Picard, Sisko, and Janeway faithfully served - does not yet exist. Starfleet is a service of the United Earth government and employs a mix of 23rd and 24th century traditions.
Colors
Gold - Command, Navigation
Red - Engineering, Security
The roles of red and gold were returned to their original series configuration, which makes sense.
Blue - Medical, Sciences, Communication
Curiously, blue is used for communication, as in the 24th century, even though it was red in the 23rd century. I personally believe this was done because neither Sub-Commander T-Pol - the Science Officer - nor Dr. Phlox - the Medical Officer - is a member of Starfleet. If Ensign Sato - the Communications Officer - did not wear blue, non one would.
Ranks
As with communications, here the 22nd century bears more resemblence to the 24th than the 23rd century, though it is not identical to either. Consistent with both other centuries, enlisted personnel have no visible insignia.
Admiral - one silver stripe, two silver stripes with a silver field between, one silver stripe
Commodore - two silver stripes
Captain - four gold pips
Commander - three silver pips
Lieutenant Commander - two silver pips, one black pip this is entirely conjectural, as we haven't seen one
Lieutenant - two silver pips
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one silver pip, one black pip again, entirely conjectural
Ensign - one silver pip
UNIFORM CODE
Wherein I will discuss the uniform traditions of Star Trek, especially with an eye on how the various traditions were combined in the prequel series Star Trek: Enterprise. This discussion will not include the original series movies, as both styles of uniforms represented therein followed entirely different color and rank insignia schemes.
{23rd Century - Star Trek (the original series)}
Colors
Gold really more of a greenish yellow - Command, Navigation
Red - Engineering, Security, Communications, JAG
Blue - Medical, Sciences
Ranks
For officers, ranks were determined by shiny gold stripes on the lower sleeves. Ensigns and crewman both had blank sleeves.
Commodore - two solid stripes with a gold field between
Fleet Captain mentioned, but no uniform was ever seen
Captain - solid stripe, dashed stripe, solid stripe
Commander - two solid stripes
Lieutenant Commander - solid stripe, dashed stripe
Lieutenant - one solid stripe
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one dashed stripe this is a conjectural guess
**********
{24th Century - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Voyager}
Colors
Red - Command, Navigation, JAG
Gold - Engineering, Operations, Security
Essentially, the roles of gold and red were reversed, though JAG (Judge Advocate General, legal services) stayed red, thus becoming more of a command function, which seems logical.
Blue - Medical Sciences, Communication
Ranks
Officers ranks were determined by round pips displayed on the collar. Enlisted crewmen for the most part had no rank insignia. The system of gold and black pips is identical to the system of full- and half-stripes emplyed by the United States Navy in the real world, with the exception of the admirals.
Fleet Admiral - four gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
Admiral - three gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
Vice Admiral - two gold pips on a black field, trimmed with a gold border
By the 24th century, the title of Commodore had lamentably disappeared from Starfleet.
Captain - four gold pips
Commander - three gold pips
Lieutenant Commander - two gold pips, one black pip
Lieutenant - two gold pips
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one gold pip, one black pip
Ensign - one gold pip
Chief Petty Officer no positive identification
For the last four seasons of DS9 Chief O'Brien's collar featured a gray patch at which we never got a terribly good look.
Senior Chief Specialist - one black pip
This arrangement was seen on various transporter operators referred to as "chief" and also Chief O'Brien at the time he was identified as a Senior Chief Specialist.
**********
{22nd Century - Star Trek: Enterprise}
At the time of the adventures of Captain Archer and his crew, the Federation - which Captains Kirk, Picard, Sisko, and Janeway faithfully served - does not yet exist. Starfleet is a service of the United Earth government and employs a mix of 23rd and 24th century traditions.
Colors
Gold - Command, Navigation
Red - Engineering, Security
The roles of red and gold were returned to their original series configuration, which makes sense.
Blue - Medical, Sciences, Communication
Curiously, blue is used for communication, as in the 24th century, even though it was red in the 23rd century. I personally believe this was done because neither Sub-Commander T-Pol - the Science Officer - nor Dr. Phlox - the Medical Officer - is a member of Starfleet. If Ensign Sato - the Communications Officer - did not wear blue, non one would.
Ranks
As with communications, here the 22nd century bears more resemblence to the 24th than the 23rd century, though it is not identical to either. Consistent with both other centuries, enlisted personnel have no visible insignia.
Admiral - one silver stripe, two silver stripes with a silver field between, one silver stripe
Commodore - two silver stripes
Captain - four gold pips
Commander - three silver pips
Lieutenant Commander - two silver pips, one black pip this is entirely conjectural, as we haven't seen one
Lieutenant - two silver pips
Lieutenant (junior grade) - one silver pip, one black pip again, entirely conjectural
Ensign - one silver pip
Thursday, February 5, 2004
Leo Wong
Ines Wong
Amy Wong
"We're not as rich as everybody says we are."
"Oh, yeah, what's the name of your sorority?"
"Kappa Kappa Wong."
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 36
Ye gods, the abomination has begun to chage the shape of my head! Well, not actually my head, but certainly my silhouette. The hairs near the back of the jaw are standing out in every direction, reaffirming my assertion that I could grow some wicked sweet 19th century muttonchops. Gilded Age, here I come!
"The Original Series"
Plowing through Star Trek, I got up early and watched "Balance of Terror" before school yesterday. Man oh man, do I love Romulans.
Star Trek: Enterprise
I very much enjoyed the show's first two seasons, when it was titled simply Enterprise; so, it was with some trepidation that I welcomed the change of direction of the third season-long Xindi story arc. After an unfocused beginning, the arc has really picked up. The last two episodes, "Proving Ground" and "Stratagem," have been excellent, and the serialized adventure has an almost DS9-like feel.
Ines Wong
Amy Wong
"We're not as rich as everybody says we are."
"Oh, yeah, what's the name of your sorority?"
"Kappa Kappa Wong."
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 36
Ye gods, the abomination has begun to chage the shape of my head! Well, not actually my head, but certainly my silhouette. The hairs near the back of the jaw are standing out in every direction, reaffirming my assertion that I could grow some wicked sweet 19th century muttonchops. Gilded Age, here I come!
"The Original Series"
Plowing through Star Trek, I got up early and watched "Balance of Terror" before school yesterday. Man oh man, do I love Romulans.
Star Trek: Enterprise
I very much enjoyed the show's first two seasons, when it was titled simply Enterprise; so, it was with some trepidation that I welcomed the change of direction of the third season-long Xindi story arc. After an unfocused beginning, the arc has really picked up. The last two episodes, "Proving Ground" and "Stratagem," have been excellent, and the serialized adventure has an almost DS9-like feel.
Wednesday, February 4, 2004
"But you're better than normal. You're abnormal!"
--Philip J. Fry to Turanga Leela, Futurama
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
Sweet fancy Moses, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy begins filming in April! And Ms. Deschanel will be playing Trisha MacMillan a.k.a. the ever-mercurial Trillian!
Vote For Kodos: Old School
Former Senator Bob Dole was the guest on The Daily Show tonight. Man, he would have been such a good president. Think about it, my donkey-loving friends, had Senator Dole bested President Clinton in '96, he probably would have been reelected in 2000, leaving Dubya as the relatively harmless governor of Texas. You guys shouldn't bitch about "43"; he's a problem of your own creation.
Bob Dole at Grand Blanc High School, home of the Bobcats, Fall 1996:
"We already have a cat in the White House. Socks. Don't you think it's about time we had a Bob?"
Hi-larious Mike Luckovich editorial cartoon, titled "Bob Dole, Age 1 1/2," Fall 1996:
"Bob Dole hates carrots! Bob Dole will scream unless he gets a cookie!! Don't spank Bob Dole!!"
Moving On
Speaking of Old School (the novel by Tobia Wolff, not the wicked funny movie starring Luke Wilson), I am very much looking forward to reading it. I greatly enjoy Wolff's writing, both his short stories and his memoirs, though I sometimes feel I'm not smart enough to understand what he's really trying to say.
Who's more intriguing: Mishal Husain or Morgan Webb? Decisions, decisions.... While I am drawn to Ms. Webb's spunk and quasi-tomboyishness, I think we all recognize that there are few things I find as attractive as cold British indifference. I am powerless before Ms. Husain's accent.
--Philip J. Fry to Turanga Leela, Futurama
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
Sweet fancy Moses, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy begins filming in April! And Ms. Deschanel will be playing Trisha MacMillan a.k.a. the ever-mercurial Trillian!
Vote For Kodos: Old School
Former Senator Bob Dole was the guest on The Daily Show tonight. Man, he would have been such a good president. Think about it, my donkey-loving friends, had Senator Dole bested President Clinton in '96, he probably would have been reelected in 2000, leaving Dubya as the relatively harmless governor of Texas. You guys shouldn't bitch about "43"; he's a problem of your own creation.
Bob Dole at Grand Blanc High School, home of the Bobcats, Fall 1996:
"We already have a cat in the White House. Socks. Don't you think it's about time we had a Bob?"
Hi-larious Mike Luckovich editorial cartoon, titled "Bob Dole, Age 1 1/2," Fall 1996:
"Bob Dole hates carrots! Bob Dole will scream unless he gets a cookie!! Don't spank Bob Dole!!"
Moving On
Speaking of Old School (the novel by Tobia Wolff, not the wicked funny movie starring Luke Wilson), I am very much looking forward to reading it. I greatly enjoy Wolff's writing, both his short stories and his memoirs, though I sometimes feel I'm not smart enough to understand what he's really trying to say.
Who's more intriguing: Mishal Husain or Morgan Webb? Decisions, decisions.... While I am drawn to Ms. Webb's spunk and quasi-tomboyishness, I think we all recognize that there are few things I find as attractive as cold British indifference. I am powerless before Ms. Husain's accent.
Following
This morning, I followed another car for a good fifteen minutes. She, the driver, cut me off and I just wasn't going to have any of that. After an intersection, two lanes become one. I was in the left-hand (going straight) lane, she was in the right-hand (turning right) lane. When the light changed, we both accelerated. I was following another car immediately ahead of me. Suddenly, the soon-to-be-offending driver swerved to the left. Had I not slammed my foot down on the brake pedal, she would have collided with my car, her driver side door into my front fender. Once out of danger, I began leaning on the horn. As soon as I stopped honking, I resolved to follow her. I had time to spare and I felt that she need to be penalized in some way. Not wanting to deal with higher insurance premiums, I opted for following her rather than denting her rear bumper.
Though at the next intersection I had wanted to turn left, I followed her in turning right. Quite the speed demon, she was quickly exceeding the speed limit by at least fiften miles per hour. I kept with her as best the Mousemobile's acceleration would allow. We entered an area of higher traffic, which allowed me to close the gap. I stuck right on her tail. Once, another car changed lanes and got between us, but I quickly accelerated and passed on the right, resuming my harassing posture. By this point, I suspected she might be aware of me. Instead of honking, I thought it more menacing to simply continue to follow. She made a sudden left turn, as did I. She swiftly changed from the left-hand to right-hand lane, as did I. She swerved back to the left-hand lane, as did I. In her rear view mirror, her eyes were large saucers.
At the next intersection, I let myself fall back so that she passed under a yellow light while I stopped at red. I doubt she feels she did anything wrong in cutting me off and I doubt my actions taught her that lesson. But if for one moment I had made her life less enjoyable, perhaps even scared her, my purpose was acheived.
This morning, I followed another car for a good fifteen minutes. She, the driver, cut me off and I just wasn't going to have any of that. After an intersection, two lanes become one. I was in the left-hand (going straight) lane, she was in the right-hand (turning right) lane. When the light changed, we both accelerated. I was following another car immediately ahead of me. Suddenly, the soon-to-be-offending driver swerved to the left. Had I not slammed my foot down on the brake pedal, she would have collided with my car, her driver side door into my front fender. Once out of danger, I began leaning on the horn. As soon as I stopped honking, I resolved to follow her. I had time to spare and I felt that she need to be penalized in some way. Not wanting to deal with higher insurance premiums, I opted for following her rather than denting her rear bumper.
Though at the next intersection I had wanted to turn left, I followed her in turning right. Quite the speed demon, she was quickly exceeding the speed limit by at least fiften miles per hour. I kept with her as best the Mousemobile's acceleration would allow. We entered an area of higher traffic, which allowed me to close the gap. I stuck right on her tail. Once, another car changed lanes and got between us, but I quickly accelerated and passed on the right, resuming my harassing posture. By this point, I suspected she might be aware of me. Instead of honking, I thought it more menacing to simply continue to follow. She made a sudden left turn, as did I. She swiftly changed from the left-hand to right-hand lane, as did I. She swerved back to the left-hand lane, as did I. In her rear view mirror, her eyes were large saucers.
At the next intersection, I let myself fall back so that she passed under a yellow light while I stopped at red. I doubt she feels she did anything wrong in cutting me off and I doubt my actions taught her that lesson. But if for one moment I had made her life less enjoyable, perhaps even scared her, my purpose was acheived.
Tuesday, February 3, 2004
Pharaoh and AIM
Two evenings ago, Skeeter let me in on the "imho" secret. See, people have used imho for quite some time, but I've been utterly clueless as to the abbreviation's meaning. Apparently, in IM parlance, "imho" stand for "in my humble opinion." I'll be honest, I always think of Imhotep. You know, Imhotep? Builder of the first pyramid? The crappy step-pyramid? Come one people, let's get with the program! To paraphrase Bart Simpson, "This ancient Egyptian culture isn't going to appreciate itself!" Sheesh. In any event, whenever I see imho, I still think of Imhotep.
Two evenings ago, Skeeter let me in on the "imho" secret. See, people have used imho for quite some time, but I've been utterly clueless as to the abbreviation's meaning. Apparently, in IM parlance, "imho" stand for "in my humble opinion." I'll be honest, I always think of Imhotep. You know, Imhotep? Builder of the first pyramid? The crappy step-pyramid? Come one people, let's get with the program! To paraphrase Bart Simpson, "This ancient Egyptian culture isn't going to appreciate itself!" Sheesh. In any event, whenever I see imho, I still think of Imhotep.
Federation Starship Dedication Plaques
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701
"... To boldly go where no man has gone before."
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-D
"... To boldly go where no one has gone before."
U.S.S. Excelsior NCC-2000
"No matter where you go, there you are."
U.S.S. Defiant NX-74205
"All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by." - John Masefield
U.S.S. Ulysses NCC-74297
"Tell me, Muse, of the man of many ways, who was driven far journeys, after he had sacked Troy's sacred citadel." (the first line of The Odyssey)
U.S.S. Aeneas NCC-2682
"Romans! These are your arts... To bear Dominion over the nations, To impose peace, To spare the conquered, and subdue the proud!" (from The Aeneid)
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 34
The facial hairs are curling relentlessly now, producing upon close inspection a slightly wild look. This bods ill.
Slightly Better Than John Navarre
Fuck Drew Henson. I hope that he is taken by an NFL team, earns to starting quarterback job, and them suffers a horrible, career-ending injury on the first play from scrimage. I don't want him dead, I just want him crippled.
Vote For Kodos
Damn it, why oh why couldn't Deanie hold off melting down until he'd secured a majority of delegates? Anywho, JFK is going to get the nomination, rest assured. On the strength of South Carolina (my least favorite state in the entire Union), Edwards will hang on for a while longer, but he's not going to be able to smile his way to the nom. Generalissimo Clark, winner of the United States's greatest. victory. ever. is a puzzling one; I have to be honest, I've heard him speak a lot, but I don't know where he stands on a single issue. I feel sorry for Joe Lieberman, because he so earnestly wants to be president, but it is never going to happen. Sorry, Joe. Give my buddy John McCain a call, he'll make you feel batter. I was sorry to see Gephardt drop out; having old school Big Labor guys around is always a hoot.
Are we in for a rerun of 1988, a George Bush versus a Massachusetts liberal? Fun and games await.
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701
"... To boldly go where no man has gone before."
U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-D
"... To boldly go where no one has gone before."
U.S.S. Excelsior NCC-2000
"No matter where you go, there you are."
U.S.S. Defiant NX-74205
"All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by." - John Masefield
U.S.S. Ulysses NCC-74297
"Tell me, Muse, of the man of many ways, who was driven far journeys, after he had sacked Troy's sacred citadel." (the first line of The Odyssey)
U.S.S. Aeneas NCC-2682
"Romans! These are your arts... To bear Dominion over the nations, To impose peace, To spare the conquered, and subdue the proud!" (from The Aeneid)
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 34
The facial hairs are curling relentlessly now, producing upon close inspection a slightly wild look. This bods ill.
Slightly Better Than John Navarre
Fuck Drew Henson. I hope that he is taken by an NFL team, earns to starting quarterback job, and them suffers a horrible, career-ending injury on the first play from scrimage. I don't want him dead, I just want him crippled.
Vote For Kodos
Damn it, why oh why couldn't Deanie hold off melting down until he'd secured a majority of delegates? Anywho, JFK is going to get the nomination, rest assured. On the strength of South Carolina (my least favorite state in the entire Union), Edwards will hang on for a while longer, but he's not going to be able to smile his way to the nom. Generalissimo Clark, winner of the United States's greatest. victory. ever. is a puzzling one; I have to be honest, I've heard him speak a lot, but I don't know where he stands on a single issue. I feel sorry for Joe Lieberman, because he so earnestly wants to be president, but it is never going to happen. Sorry, Joe. Give my buddy John McCain a call, he'll make you feel batter. I was sorry to see Gephardt drop out; having old school Big Labor guys around is always a hoot.
Are we in for a rerun of 1988, a George Bush versus a Massachusetts liberal? Fun and games await.
Monday, February 2, 2004
M2K4
Both Opportunity and Spirit are fully functional and busily roaming about the martian landscape. Meanwhile, Beagle 2 is, at best, a smoldering pile of rubbish. Ha.
National Aeronautics and Space Administration 5*, European Space Agency 0.
*Viking I, Viking II, Pathfinder and Sojourner, Spirit, and Opportunity.
Both Opportunity and Spirit are fully functional and busily roaming about the martian landscape. Meanwhile, Beagle 2 is, at best, a smoldering pile of rubbish. Ha.
National Aeronautics and Space Administration 5*, European Space Agency 0.
*Viking I, Viking II, Pathfinder and Sojourner, Spirit, and Opportunity.
Booze Trek
Saurian brandy
Romulan ale
Klingon bloodwine
kanar (Cardassian)
root beer ("hew-mon")
{A Column of Columns}
Here's what I'm working on for the relaunch of The Newsletter:
China Title is top secret! And after the initial column, I'm sure there will be more sinocentric diatribes to come.
Europe There are actually a couple different topics I want to write about, including European ineptitude, integration and the EU... and, well, two is a couple; so, I should stop there. Titles include: "Proud Europa", "Maastricht", and "The Hour of Europe."
The UN Tied in with Europe's impotence is "The Shadow of Srebrenica."
Jimmy Carter And why that rat bastard son of a bitch can go to fucking Hell in "Malaise Forever!"
In the first year of The Newsletter , I noticed people seemed the most contented when I wrote about geopolitical topics; so, witht he new volume I am attempting to give the people what they want. In the immortal words of Congressman Morris Udall, "The people have spoken---the bastards." Of course, it won't all be deadly seriousness...
Music That's right, baby, "Radio Free Wilson '04!"
Terrible Puns Including "Muzak or Muse... Zach?" The horror, the horror.
Saurian brandy
Romulan ale
Klingon bloodwine
kanar (Cardassian)
root beer ("hew-mon")
{A Column of Columns}
Here's what I'm working on for the relaunch of The Newsletter:
China Title is top secret! And after the initial column, I'm sure there will be more sinocentric diatribes to come.
Europe There are actually a couple different topics I want to write about, including European ineptitude, integration and the EU... and, well, two is a couple; so, I should stop there. Titles include: "Proud Europa", "Maastricht", and "The Hour of Europe."
The UN Tied in with Europe's impotence is "The Shadow of Srebrenica."
Jimmy Carter And why that rat bastard son of a bitch can go to fucking Hell in "Malaise Forever!"
In the first year of The Newsletter , I noticed people seemed the most contented when I wrote about geopolitical topics; so, witht he new volume I am attempting to give the people what they want. In the immortal words of Congressman Morris Udall, "The people have spoken---the bastards." Of course, it won't all be deadly seriousness...
Music That's right, baby, "Radio Free Wilson '04!"
Terrible Puns Including "Muzak or Muse... Zach?" The horror, the horror.
Sunday, February 1, 2004
The Collaborator?
Am I Edgar Snow? This afternoon, I was reading John McCain's memoir Worth the Fighting For. Therein, he refers to the 1979 border war between Vietnam and China, inaccurately stating that Vietnam won. Quite simply, they did not. But as I read that passage, I became angry, partially because McCain himself always expresses great distain for those who misrepresent history, yet here he was doing the same thing, but also because he was insulting China. This gave me pause. China is a steadfastly undemocratic country that in the coming century could very well pose a serious threat to the international supremacy of my beloved America, and yet here I was upset because China's honor had been insulted.
Then it struck me that I don't get angry over Tiananmen Square anymore; I used to say, "The summer I turned ten, I saw the Chinese government ruthlessly supress a peaceful call for reform. Whatever else I learn about China, my opinion will always be colored by the Tiananmen Square massacre." I used to despise the government in Beijing, denouncing them as butchers. Now, I wonder if I've become an apologist. Instead of anger, now I only feel vague sadness when I think about Tiananmen Square; the Chinese leadership was not justified in turning the guns of the People's Liberation Amry on the people, but at the same time, what the hell did the students expect would happen? The response of the senior leadership, the reassertion of control by the hardliners over the most radical reformers, was brutal, but also completely predictable. I admit the advantage of hindsight, but had I been 24 in 1989 and known as much about that China as my 24 year-old self knows about today's China, I could have told you that the logical end of the Tiananmen protests was the massacre.
The ruthlessness of the Chinese Communist Party no longer shocks me, no longer surprises me. So I ask, with genuine concern, have I become Edgar Snow? Snow was an American "journalist"; In the 1950s, he was one of the only Americans granted access to the then new People's Republic. Though he clothed himself in journalistic integrity, Snow was a fawning sycophant of Mao, and his famous book, Red Star Over China, bore little resemblence to reality. I know that I am not yet that far gone, but I fear that behaps I have already taken more than a few steps on that path to the dark side. Is my reaction to Tiananmen the sign of a mature, informed opinion, or the self-delusions of a collaborator and apologist? On this point, I am certain only that the matter requires greater and more careful introspection.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 32
Yesterday, I shaved my cheeks and it has made all the difference in the world. Though my beard does not rise much above my jawline, below that point it does not look completely terrible. The hair is not dense enough to justify growing a beard for real, but it is almost respectable. On my cheeks, though, were scattered outbreaks of single hairs here and there, enough to look crappy, but not enough to provide any coverage. So, yeterday I shaved them into oblivion. It is a substantial improvement, both in the look of the overall debalce and my state of mind.
Am I Edgar Snow? This afternoon, I was reading John McCain's memoir Worth the Fighting For. Therein, he refers to the 1979 border war between Vietnam and China, inaccurately stating that Vietnam won. Quite simply, they did not. But as I read that passage, I became angry, partially because McCain himself always expresses great distain for those who misrepresent history, yet here he was doing the same thing, but also because he was insulting China. This gave me pause. China is a steadfastly undemocratic country that in the coming century could very well pose a serious threat to the international supremacy of my beloved America, and yet here I was upset because China's honor had been insulted.
Then it struck me that I don't get angry over Tiananmen Square anymore; I used to say, "The summer I turned ten, I saw the Chinese government ruthlessly supress a peaceful call for reform. Whatever else I learn about China, my opinion will always be colored by the Tiananmen Square massacre." I used to despise the government in Beijing, denouncing them as butchers. Now, I wonder if I've become an apologist. Instead of anger, now I only feel vague sadness when I think about Tiananmen Square; the Chinese leadership was not justified in turning the guns of the People's Liberation Amry on the people, but at the same time, what the hell did the students expect would happen? The response of the senior leadership, the reassertion of control by the hardliners over the most radical reformers, was brutal, but also completely predictable. I admit the advantage of hindsight, but had I been 24 in 1989 and known as much about that China as my 24 year-old self knows about today's China, I could have told you that the logical end of the Tiananmen protests was the massacre.
The ruthlessness of the Chinese Communist Party no longer shocks me, no longer surprises me. So I ask, with genuine concern, have I become Edgar Snow? Snow was an American "journalist"; In the 1950s, he was one of the only Americans granted access to the then new People's Republic. Though he clothed himself in journalistic integrity, Snow was a fawning sycophant of Mao, and his famous book, Red Star Over China, bore little resemblence to reality. I know that I am not yet that far gone, but I fear that behaps I have already taken more than a few steps on that path to the dark side. Is my reaction to Tiananmen the sign of a mature, informed opinion, or the self-delusions of a collaborator and apologist? On this point, I am certain only that the matter requires greater and more careful introspection.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 32
Yesterday, I shaved my cheeks and it has made all the difference in the world. Though my beard does not rise much above my jawline, below that point it does not look completely terrible. The hair is not dense enough to justify growing a beard for real, but it is almost respectable. On my cheeks, though, were scattered outbreaks of single hairs here and there, enough to look crappy, but not enough to provide any coverage. So, yeterday I shaved them into oblivion. It is a substantial improvement, both in the look of the overall debalce and my state of mind.
Saturday, January 31, 2004
Grudge Match
Mao Zedong versus Chiang Kai-shek was a gurdge match, somehow Hu Jintao versus Chen Shui-bian just doesn't carry the same menacing overtones. And yet even today, there is a very real threat of armed conflict between the two Chinas, brother killing brother over the Strait of Taiwan. For more information, comsult ye olde Internet, your local library, or, best of all, read the first new issue of The Newsletter, available just in time for Valentine's Day.
To subscribe, contact: sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
Mao Zedong versus Chiang Kai-shek was a gurdge match, somehow Hu Jintao versus Chen Shui-bian just doesn't carry the same menacing overtones. And yet even today, there is a very real threat of armed conflict between the two Chinas, brother killing brother over the Strait of Taiwan. For more information, comsult ye olde Internet, your local library, or, best of all, read the first new issue of The Newsletter, available just in time for Valentine's Day.
To subscribe, contact: sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
Friday, January 30, 2004
I just got back from seeing Mystic River with my mom. I was the youngest person in the theatre by twenty, maybe twenty-five, years. I loathe old people, they are such sheep. Is it too much to ask to see one old lady without the standard issue puffy ball haircut? And these idiots compose and ever greater percentage of our population.
Who says a global influenza pandemic would necessarily be a bad thing...
Who says a global influenza pandemic would necessarily be a bad thing...
Mostly Harmless
As I learned from the Mountain of Love just moments ago, and confirmed with our friends at the Internet Movie Database (imdb.com), there is a feature film verion of Douglas Adams's The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy in preparation for release next year. By Milliways, this is perhaps the best news ever! (Not really, but it's still pretty good news.) The Mountain further alleges that the film may star the always brilliant Mos Def as Ford Prefect and the unparalleled Zooey Deschanel as Trillian. Great Scott! Oh, I couldn't possibly be happier.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 30
Today, I have no patience for this monstrosity on my lower jaw.
Odd, that.
Lord Hutton's inquiry was hailed by the BBC as the perfect way to settle the controversey surrounding BBC reporter Andrew Gallagher, Blair Government spokesman Alastair Campbell, the "sexing up" of a dossier on Iraqi weapons of mass destruction, and suicide of Dr. David Kelly. Lord Hutton is one of the United Kingdom's most respected jurists; his reputation for fairness and impartiality was repeated praised in BBC broadcasts. Curiously, once his report was released, resulting in the sacking of BBC Chairman Gavyn Davies, Director General Greg Dyke, and Gallagher, they bitterly said the report was biased and incomplete. So, Lord Hutton was fair and impartial only as long as he ruled in your favor? Genuine class, those three.
Did someone mention Alec Guinness?
As I learned from the Mountain of Love just moments ago, and confirmed with our friends at the Internet Movie Database (imdb.com), there is a feature film verion of Douglas Adams's The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy in preparation for release next year. By Milliways, this is perhaps the best news ever! (Not really, but it's still pretty good news.) The Mountain further alleges that the film may star the always brilliant Mos Def as Ford Prefect and the unparalleled Zooey Deschanel as Trillian. Great Scott! Oh, I couldn't possibly be happier.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 30
Today, I have no patience for this monstrosity on my lower jaw.
Odd, that.
Lord Hutton's inquiry was hailed by the BBC as the perfect way to settle the controversey surrounding BBC reporter Andrew Gallagher, Blair Government spokesman Alastair Campbell, the "sexing up" of a dossier on Iraqi weapons of mass destruction, and suicide of Dr. David Kelly. Lord Hutton is one of the United Kingdom's most respected jurists; his reputation for fairness and impartiality was repeated praised in BBC broadcasts. Curiously, once his report was released, resulting in the sacking of BBC Chairman Gavyn Davies, Director General Greg Dyke, and Gallagher, they bitterly said the report was biased and incomplete. So, Lord Hutton was fair and impartial only as long as he ruled in your favor? Genuine class, those three.
Did someone mention Alec Guinness?
This is Shocking, Shocking
The Sardine must be denounced! She dared to compare the glory of the Hour That Nobody Wanted to the wretched debaucheries of frat boys. Ignorance is one thing, but this... this is shocking. Somebody organize some Red Guards, we need to have a good ol-fashioned denunciation meeting! We'll have Little Red Books and relentless self-criticisms and finally crush the capitalist roaders! Long live the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution! Well, maybe not, but this outrage cannot stand.
The Sardine must be denounced! She dared to compare the glory of the Hour That Nobody Wanted to the wretched debaucheries of frat boys. Ignorance is one thing, but this... this is shocking. Somebody organize some Red Guards, we need to have a good ol-fashioned denunciation meeting! We'll have Little Red Books and relentless self-criticisms and finally crush the capitalist roaders! Long live the Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution! Well, maybe not, but this outrage cannot stand.
Thursday, January 29, 2004
Well, I was hoping to work on the SPP (post a summary of the first story arc, reconstructed from my incomplete notes and what I remember; I'd have more written down or I would have made a greater effort to memorize it, but it was written down in the old Forums specifically so I wouldn't have to remember... shades of The Last Crusade), but the Forums won't let me log in. Curses!
La de la, lum de lum.
So, Neutral Man and I are IMing about Star Trek and the girl who just broke his heart.
La de la, lum de lum.
So, Neutral Man and I are IMing about Star Trek and the girl who just broke his heart.
Year of the Monkey
Chinese New Year was last week. The effects are being felt far and wide. The BTW logo is a monkey; clearly, this year we're unstoppable.
Chinese New Year was last week. The effects are being felt far and wide. The BTW logo is a monkey; clearly, this year we're unstoppable.
Wednesday, January 28, 2004
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
Hang on to your hats, folks, this may be more than you can handle in one interview: Parker Posey interviewing Zooey Deschanel!
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 28
Four weeks and yet this misbegotten debacle shows no signs of abating. I've sort of hit a wall, as the hair doesn't seem to be getting any longer. However, by curling back upon itself, it does appear thicker and slightly less crappy.
When in Rome
Also, I gave in to my curiosity and looked it up:
Augustus
Tiberius
Caligula
Claudius
Nero
Galba*
Otho*
Vitellius*
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
*A.D. 68 "The Year of the Three Emperors"
Hang on to your hats, folks, this may be more than you can handle in one interview: Parker Posey interviewing Zooey Deschanel!
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 28
Four weeks and yet this misbegotten debacle shows no signs of abating. I've sort of hit a wall, as the hair doesn't seem to be getting any longer. However, by curling back upon itself, it does appear thicker and slightly less crappy.
When in Rome
Also, I gave in to my curiosity and looked it up:
Augustus
Tiberius
Caligula
Claudius
Nero
Galba*
Otho*
Vitellius*
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
*A.D. 68 "The Year of the Three Emperors"
Parallels
Possibly the single best episode of Futurama? "Luck of the Fryrish," the episode in which we see Fry's relationship with his brother Yancy.
Possibly the single best episode of Cowboy Bebop? "Speak Like a Child," the episode in which we see the Beta video tape from Faye's past.
The moral? The present becomes the cherished past, take the time to appreciate where you are and what you have.
Possibly the single best episode of Futurama? "Luck of the Fryrish," the episode in which we see Fry's relationship with his brother Yancy.
Possibly the single best episode of Cowboy Bebop? "Speak Like a Child," the episode in which we see the Beta video tape from Faye's past.
The moral? The present becomes the cherished past, take the time to appreciate where you are and what you have.
Tuesday, January 27, 2004
Vote For Kodos
With victories in both Iowa and New Hampshire under his belt, history would suggest that Senator Kerry will be the Democrat nominee for the presidency. John "The Patrician" Kerry vs. George "The Cowboy" Bush. It's funny how Democrats hate Bush for being born into money, but don't mind Kerry marrying into money. Senator Kerry is actually not a bad guy. Except for the fact that he bend whichever way the wind is blowing, he wouldn't be a bad president. Nevertheless, my boys are going to eat him alive. It's not that the Democrats aren't just as vicious as we Republicans, it's just... well, I defer to Charlie Pierce:
"The Republicans are grown comfortable with their political id. They set it right up in the parlor---or more specifically in the House of Representatives, where the wild things still do play and where the Republicans brought forward only the second impeachment ever of an American president simply because they had the votes to do it."
It may not be right and sure as hell isn't fair, but we're going to eat Kerry alive with just two little words, "Massachusetts liberal."
With victories in both Iowa and New Hampshire under his belt, history would suggest that Senator Kerry will be the Democrat nominee for the presidency. John "The Patrician" Kerry vs. George "The Cowboy" Bush. It's funny how Democrats hate Bush for being born into money, but don't mind Kerry marrying into money. Senator Kerry is actually not a bad guy. Except for the fact that he bend whichever way the wind is blowing, he wouldn't be a bad president. Nevertheless, my boys are going to eat him alive. It's not that the Democrats aren't just as vicious as we Republicans, it's just... well, I defer to Charlie Pierce:
"The Republicans are grown comfortable with their political id. They set it right up in the parlor---or more specifically in the House of Representatives, where the wild things still do play and where the Republicans brought forward only the second impeachment ever of an American president simply because they had the votes to do it."
It may not be right and sure as hell isn't fair, but we're going to eat Kerry alive with just two little words, "Massachusetts liberal."
Ignorance and Intolerance in the Name of the Lord
On the way here, I was listening to The Diane Rehm Show on NPR. Diane's guest was the Reverend Pat Robertson. Rev. Robertson made some interesting points. For instance, our forefathers (from his tone, he meant back in colonial days) respected the sabbath by not participating in commerce on Sundays; in his opinion, we should do the same. I feel it necessary to point out our forefathers also thought it Christian and moral to own slaves, and to deny most people the right to vote. (In my family, ages 53-22, there are five of us, but only my father could vote. My mother and sister - a lawyer - would be disqualified because of their gender, while my brother and I, both white males, would be excluded as we are not property owners.) If you insist we should blindly ape out ancestors, Reverend, you must be more thorough, or run the risk of hypocrisy.
Also, he feels that the United States, as a nation, should acknowledge our Christian cultural heritage the same way Islamic states do. Saudi Arabia is officially acknowledged as an Islamic state, the new formal name for Afghanistan is the Islamic Republic of Afghanistan. I am sincerly impressed with Rev. Robertson that he feels we are morally superior to Muslim countries and that we are distinct and better, yet at the same time we should use their practices as an example to shape our own. It is impressive that a man can so strongly believe in two such contradictory beliefs.
Days like this, I understand why the Mountain is an atheist.
On the way here, I was listening to The Diane Rehm Show on NPR. Diane's guest was the Reverend Pat Robertson. Rev. Robertson made some interesting points. For instance, our forefathers (from his tone, he meant back in colonial days) respected the sabbath by not participating in commerce on Sundays; in his opinion, we should do the same. I feel it necessary to point out our forefathers also thought it Christian and moral to own slaves, and to deny most people the right to vote. (In my family, ages 53-22, there are five of us, but only my father could vote. My mother and sister - a lawyer - would be disqualified because of their gender, while my brother and I, both white males, would be excluded as we are not property owners.) If you insist we should blindly ape out ancestors, Reverend, you must be more thorough, or run the risk of hypocrisy.
Also, he feels that the United States, as a nation, should acknowledge our Christian cultural heritage the same way Islamic states do. Saudi Arabia is officially acknowledged as an Islamic state, the new formal name for Afghanistan is the Islamic Republic of Afghanistan. I am sincerly impressed with Rev. Robertson that he feels we are morally superior to Muslim countries and that we are distinct and better, yet at the same time we should use their practices as an example to shape our own. It is impressive that a man can so strongly believe in two such contradictory beliefs.
Days like this, I understand why the Mountain is an atheist.
Some would say that reviving The Newsletter on the slim hope that such a pathetic gesture could possibly catch the attention of and impress Zooey Deschanel is foolhardy. Some would say that, but not me. Now that kind of crackpot theory, that's exactly what we mean when we say "Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter."
When in Rome
I can never remember, is it
Augustus
Tiberius
Caligula
Claudius
Nero
Galba
Otho
Vitellius
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
or
Augustus
Tiberius
Claudius
Caligula
Nero
Galba
Otho
Vitellius
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
?
I mean, yes, I know I could just look it up, but where in that entirely sensible plan is there a waste of time post? Huh? See, that's the Mike Wilson difference, I'm always three steps ahead.
I can never remember, is it
Augustus
Tiberius
Caligula
Claudius
Nero
Galba
Otho
Vitellius
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
or
Augustus
Tiberius
Claudius
Caligula
Nero
Galba
Otho
Vitellius
Vespasian
Titus
Domitian
?
I mean, yes, I know I could just look it up, but where in that entirely sensible plan is there a waste of time post? Huh? See, that's the Mike Wilson difference, I'm always three steps ahead.
Monday, January 26, 2004
When in Rome
2004: MMIV
2000: MM
1997: MCMXCVII
1979: MCMLXXIX
1888: MDCCCLXXXVIII
1517: MDXVII
1492: MCDXCII
1215: MCCXV
1066: MLXVI
476: CDLXXVI
395: CCCXCV
Yeah, dude.
Non-Teenaged Politics
Today, my mom and I were debating the merits of the doctrine of preemption. She agrees that it is a good thing that Hussein is no longer in power, but she feels uncertain about the war. Huh? The only way to remove him from power was the war; thus, it was the means to an end which she says was good. Of course, I've gotten use to my mom's positions not standing up to even the most trivial investigation. She's a smart woman, but sometimes she refuses to think. (Of course, she thinks President Clinton is a saint for not doing anything to al Qaeda afte the African embassy attacks; so, go figure.)
2004: MMIV
2000: MM
1997: MCMXCVII
1979: MCMLXXIX
1888: MDCCCLXXXVIII
1517: MDXVII
1492: MCDXCII
1215: MCCXV
1066: MLXVI
476: CDLXXVI
395: CCCXCV
Yeah, dude.
Non-Teenaged Politics
Today, my mom and I were debating the merits of the doctrine of preemption. She agrees that it is a good thing that Hussein is no longer in power, but she feels uncertain about the war. Huh? The only way to remove him from power was the war; thus, it was the means to an end which she says was good. Of course, I've gotten use to my mom's positions not standing up to even the most trivial investigation. She's a smart woman, but sometimes she refuses to think. (Of course, she thinks President Clinton is a saint for not doing anything to al Qaeda afte the African embassy attacks; so, go figure.)
Sweet merciful crap, Ron Marz is returning as the writer of Green Lantern! Ron Marz! Ron Marz is the genius who wrote the first seventy-five issues (six years) of Kyle Rayner's reign as Green Lantern. To date, he is the only writer who understand Kyle as a character; the others constructed him as some manner of pale Hal Jordan-imitation or a whiny, self-righteous rave kid. Fools! Fear not, though, Ron Marz will set things right! This is the best comics news in forever. Woo hoo!
Sunday, January 25, 2004
Many Endeavours, One (Easily Distracted) Mind
a) school: I don't know if this is a good idea or a bad idea, but it's what my parents want me to do, and since I'm living in their house, I feel a certain obligation to indulge their wishes.
b) The Newsletter: If memory serves, producing one's own newsletter, no matter how intriguing the ideas, chews up quite a bit of time. That said, in preperation for the revival I've been studying the thirteen month run of the original and I cannot adequately express how happy those twenty-two issues make me. The Newsletter is joy.
c) The Space Pirates Project: We suffered the setback of the loss of all our records when the Forums rebooted, but I do not want to see this august project wither. I really think the tales of the crew of the pirate starship Scarlet Narwhal will one day make a really sweet cartoon show. Coming not necessarily soon to a television near you.
Teen Titans!
I cannot say enough good things about Teen Titans. This is a seriously good show. Behind all the truly funny jokes and anime-isms, it is a serious story about the Titans having to grow up in order to thwart their dark nemesis, Slade (voiced by the great Ron Perlman). Robin, Starfire, Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy. "T-E-E-N, T-I-T, A-N-S, Teen Titans, let's go!"
a) school: I don't know if this is a good idea or a bad idea, but it's what my parents want me to do, and since I'm living in their house, I feel a certain obligation to indulge their wishes.
b) The Newsletter: If memory serves, producing one's own newsletter, no matter how intriguing the ideas, chews up quite a bit of time. That said, in preperation for the revival I've been studying the thirteen month run of the original and I cannot adequately express how happy those twenty-two issues make me. The Newsletter is joy.
c) The Space Pirates Project: We suffered the setback of the loss of all our records when the Forums rebooted, but I do not want to see this august project wither. I really think the tales of the crew of the pirate starship Scarlet Narwhal will one day make a really sweet cartoon show. Coming not necessarily soon to a television near you.
Teen Titans!
I cannot say enough good things about Teen Titans. This is a seriously good show. Behind all the truly funny jokes and anime-isms, it is a serious story about the Titans having to grow up in order to thwart their dark nemesis, Slade (voiced by the great Ron Perlman). Robin, Starfire, Cyborg, Raven, and Beast Boy. "T-E-E-N, T-I-T, A-N-S, Teen Titans, let's go!"
This is Mike, El Commandante of the Rebel Black Dot Society, now broadcasting from my own computer. HAL seem to be working fine and after some initial difficulties, the router is behaving. Excellent.
M2K4
Spirit has been upgraded from "critical" to "serious" condition. Horrible play on words: Would it be good or bad if Spirit was in Sirius condition?
Opportunity has touched down safely. Go, dynamic duo! Also, because JPL is near LA, Governor Schwarzenegger was on hand. Holy shit, the Terminator is governor of California. What a time to be alive.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 25
The accuresed itching has returned. What the hell? My "beard" has now transitioned from being long, crappy-looking stubble to short, crappy-looking hair. Huzzah.
M2K4
Spirit has been upgraded from "critical" to "serious" condition. Horrible play on words: Would it be good or bad if Spirit was in Sirius condition?
Opportunity has touched down safely. Go, dynamic duo! Also, because JPL is near LA, Governor Schwarzenegger was on hand. Holy shit, the Terminator is governor of California. What a time to be alive.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 25
The accuresed itching has returned. What the hell? My "beard" has now transitioned from being long, crappy-looking stubble to short, crappy-looking hair. Huzzah.
Saturday, January 24, 2004
My dad has not gone to work all week, citing illness. Yeah, I like how he's so sick he can stay up past midnight working on a war games project he won't even get to play until next Christmas. I like how he's so sick he can go back and forth between his study in the basement and the computer room upstairs consulting various reference materials. He's worked at AC/Delphi for thirty years; he has five weeks of discretionary vacation a year. If he wants to use those days because he just doesn't feel like going to work, that's fine. Just be fucking honest about it. Don't play for sympathy by pretending you're sick. Fucking jerk.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 23*
The scariest part of this mess is that I'm actually looking forward with anticipation to how this monstrosity will look in March. Now that's disturbing.
*I meant to post this sometime Friday afternoon or evening, but my father was bogarting the computer the entire time.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 23*
The scariest part of this mess is that I'm actually looking forward with anticipation to how this monstrosity will look in March. Now that's disturbing.
*I meant to post this sometime Friday afternoon or evening, but my father was bogarting the computer the entire time.
Friday, January 23, 2004
Thursday, January 22, 2004
M2K4
Come on, Spirit. Pull through, little buddy.
I hate sleep. I like being asleep and I love going back to sleep after waking up, but I hate the fact that we have to sleep. I love staying up at night, yet I also love being up early. I hate getting up early, but once I'm awake, I love having so many more hours in the day. So, I'm just going to have to learn to live with less sleep. This'll be fun.
I missed another Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day yesterday. Curses! It isn't that I don't appreciate Zooey Deschanel, I do, I really really do, it's just so easy to forget, especially since my dad's been monopolizing the ciomputer this week. I'm sorry. I promise, though, I've got a crackerjack surprise planned for next week's Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day. You'll love it.
Los Lobos aren't a great band, but they're pretty good. And they are ideal background music.
Vote For Kodos
Yeah, I didn't watch tonight's Dem debate. I wonder if they all ganged up on Kerry like they used to do with Deanie, or if it's an every-man-for-himself brawl now.
The single best reason to watch the BBC World News: to actually hear some international news, since the American press seems to have a paralyzing fear of actually traversing either of the great oceans on either side of our continent. The second best reason to watch the BBC World News: Mishal Husain. Yummy.
The Newsletter
The Plate and I are in regular communication about the revival; so, I'm really more and more excited all the time. This is going to be awesome.
Come on, Spirit. Pull through, little buddy.
I hate sleep. I like being asleep and I love going back to sleep after waking up, but I hate the fact that we have to sleep. I love staying up at night, yet I also love being up early. I hate getting up early, but once I'm awake, I love having so many more hours in the day. So, I'm just going to have to learn to live with less sleep. This'll be fun.
I missed another Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day yesterday. Curses! It isn't that I don't appreciate Zooey Deschanel, I do, I really really do, it's just so easy to forget, especially since my dad's been monopolizing the ciomputer this week. I'm sorry. I promise, though, I've got a crackerjack surprise planned for next week's Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day. You'll love it.
Los Lobos aren't a great band, but they're pretty good. And they are ideal background music.
Vote For Kodos
Yeah, I didn't watch tonight's Dem debate. I wonder if they all ganged up on Kerry like they used to do with Deanie, or if it's an every-man-for-himself brawl now.
The single best reason to watch the BBC World News: to actually hear some international news, since the American press seems to have a paralyzing fear of actually traversing either of the great oceans on either side of our continent. The second best reason to watch the BBC World News: Mishal Husain. Yummy.
The Newsletter
The Plate and I are in regular communication about the revival; so, I'm really more and more excited all the time. This is going to be awesome.
Wednesday, January 21, 2004
"Hey Julie, look what they're doing to me,
Trying to trip me up, trying to wear me down.
Julie, I swear it's so hard to bear it,
And I'd never make it through without you around,
No I'd never make it through without you around."
--Fountains of Wayne, "Hey Julie" from Welcome Interstate Managers
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 21
Wow, I've been doing this crap for three weeks now? Huh. Time flies. I trimmed my sideburns the other day, resulting in even less distinction between them and the "beard." Once the BBB is over, I've decided to sport a terrible mustache for at least another week. The only question is whether I'll retain the imperial with the 'stache or shave it off and start from scratch after the Massive Mustache Mistake is over.
Trekkin'
No new episode of Star Trek: Enterprise tonight; it is being preempted by basketball for the second week in a row. Both The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine aired exclusively in syndication; both Voyager and now Enterprise were condemned to the ill-conceived UPN debacle. Sure, TNG and DS9 were occasionally preempted, but not with nearly the frequency at which Enterprise is disturbed. Gee, if new episodes debut at random times of Saturday, it seems no wonder that the ratings are less than stellar. The original Star Trek became the icon it is today in syndication; The Next Generation won all it's three bajillion Emmys in syndication. Star Trek works best in syndication. Paramount is killing it's own golden goose with the ill-conceived and poorly-executed United Paramount Network.
I like Enterprise, but I have a question: where are the writers who made TNG and DS9 great? Why are the only Trek vets alumni of *gag* Voyager? Where are Michael Piller, Ira Steven Behr, Robert Hewitt Wolfe, Ronald D. Moore, Rene Echevarria, Hans Beimler, and Bradley Thompson and David Weddle? Of singluar importance amongst that august group, where is Ira Steven Behr (mastermind of Deep Space Nine)? These are supremely talented people, Mr. Berman (Gene Roddenberry's hand-picked successor), far more talented than your current partner Brannon Braga.
Trying to trip me up, trying to wear me down.
Julie, I swear it's so hard to bear it,
And I'd never make it through without you around,
No I'd never make it through without you around."
--Fountains of Wayne, "Hey Julie" from Welcome Interstate Managers
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 21
Wow, I've been doing this crap for three weeks now? Huh. Time flies. I trimmed my sideburns the other day, resulting in even less distinction between them and the "beard." Once the BBB is over, I've decided to sport a terrible mustache for at least another week. The only question is whether I'll retain the imperial with the 'stache or shave it off and start from scratch after the Massive Mustache Mistake is over.
Trekkin'
No new episode of Star Trek: Enterprise tonight; it is being preempted by basketball for the second week in a row. Both The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine aired exclusively in syndication; both Voyager and now Enterprise were condemned to the ill-conceived UPN debacle. Sure, TNG and DS9 were occasionally preempted, but not with nearly the frequency at which Enterprise is disturbed. Gee, if new episodes debut at random times of Saturday, it seems no wonder that the ratings are less than stellar. The original Star Trek became the icon it is today in syndication; The Next Generation won all it's three bajillion Emmys in syndication. Star Trek works best in syndication. Paramount is killing it's own golden goose with the ill-conceived and poorly-executed United Paramount Network.
I like Enterprise, but I have a question: where are the writers who made TNG and DS9 great? Why are the only Trek vets alumni of *gag* Voyager? Where are Michael Piller, Ira Steven Behr, Robert Hewitt Wolfe, Ronald D. Moore, Rene Echevarria, Hans Beimler, and Bradley Thompson and David Weddle? Of singluar importance amongst that august group, where is Ira Steven Behr (mastermind of Deep Space Nine)? These are supremely talented people, Mr. Berman (Gene Roddenberry's hand-picked successor), far more talented than your current partner Brannon Braga.
Tuesday, January 20, 2004
Vote For Kodos
I have to tell you, I absolutely loved the first twenty minutes (the foreign policy part) of the State of the Union. I have to say I heartily agree with his argument about the internationalization of the occupation of Iraq. Since when is Europe composed solely of France and Germany? (And before I am denounced as a neo-con simpleton, I know more about foreign affairs over the last century than you do. Doubt me? Bring it, bitch, and I'll school you like nobody's business.) The president it at his best with a swagger in his step. Swagger: one of the best words in the English language, and also one of the best concepts.
I have to tell you, I absolutely loved the first twenty minutes (the foreign policy part) of the State of the Union. I have to say I heartily agree with his argument about the internationalization of the occupation of Iraq. Since when is Europe composed solely of France and Germany? (And before I am denounced as a neo-con simpleton, I know more about foreign affairs over the last century than you do. Doubt me? Bring it, bitch, and I'll school you like nobody's business.) The president it at his best with a swagger in his step. Swagger: one of the best words in the English language, and also one of the best concepts.
Both for school and the revival of The Newsletter, my computer is being hooked. Dad says I have to figure out the Internet connections myself. *grumble grumble* I"ll let you guys know (as if you cared) as soon as I'm on my own machine.
Vote For Kodos
Man, Deanie has gone fuckin' nuts. John Stewart compared his little rant to Gollum; on Around the Horn, they called him "Macho Man" Randy Savage. Wild.
The Republican (Forces of Evil)
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Democrats (Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys) post-Hawkeye State
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
Al Sharpton of New York
quitters
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
Vote For Kodos
Man, Deanie has gone fuckin' nuts. John Stewart compared his little rant to Gollum; on Around the Horn, they called him "Macho Man" Randy Savage. Wild.
The Republican (Forces of Evil)
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Democrats (Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys) post-Hawkeye State
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
Al Sharpton of New York
quitters
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
Monday, January 19, 2004
Good names for a band: Mars Attacks!, The Warbirds, Warbird, The Red Menace.
Atkins
It should be noted that Dr. Robert Atkins, inventor of the Atkins diet, died last year. Dr. Atkins lived what he taught: he followed his own diet. He died at age 72. Average life-expectancy is 77.2. Ha!
Also, anyone else notice that the Atkins symobl is a red "A"? Rather bold, methinks, for them to promote themselves via the scarlet letter. Hawthorne would be proud?
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 19
While here yesterday, the Mountain of Love said my "beard" is doing better than he thought it would. He is growing his beard in preparation for a role in Don Giovanni. As he sometimes calls us "Super Wilson Bros.", he said that in March, at the opera's performance, we shall be "Super Beard Bros!" To this I replied that there is nothing super about these abominations.
Atkins
It should be noted that Dr. Robert Atkins, inventor of the Atkins diet, died last year. Dr. Atkins lived what he taught: he followed his own diet. He died at age 72. Average life-expectancy is 77.2. Ha!
Also, anyone else notice that the Atkins symobl is a red "A"? Rather bold, methinks, for them to promote themselves via the scarlet letter. Hawthorne would be proud?
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 19
While here yesterday, the Mountain of Love said my "beard" is doing better than he thought it would. He is growing his beard in preparation for a role in Don Giovanni. As he sometimes calls us "Super Wilson Bros.", he said that in March, at the opera's performance, we shall be "Super Beard Bros!" To this I replied that there is nothing super about these abominations.
Sunday, January 18, 2004
Hooray, the Mountain's here! Good news, his soul is going to haunt me after his death. He may be an atheist, but at least he has a solid philosophical framework for the afterlife.
Star Trek: Enteprise Season 3 To Date
"The Xindi"
"Anomaly"
"Extinction"
"Raijin"
"Impulse"
"Exile"
"The Shipment"
"Twilight"
"North Star"
"Similitude"
"Carpenter Street"
"Chosen Realm"
Star Trek: Enteprise Season 3 To Date
"The Xindi"
"Anomaly"
"Extinction"
"Raijin"
"Impulse"
"Exile"
"The Shipment"
"Twilight"
"North Star"
"Similitude"
"Carpenter Street"
"Chosen Realm"
The Romulan Bird-of-Prey seen on Star Trek: Enterprise is almost perfect. All it is lacking is a large predatory bird painted along the lower hull. I hope that there will be further appearances, and that these appearances correct this glaring oversight.
Black Dot
I am El Presidente of the Rebel Black Dot Society. Judging by the results of a preliminary Google search, the Rebel Black Dot Society is far more active than those jerks in the Black Dot Soceity. Either that, or the wiley bastards have gone underground. Hmmmmmm. No matter, their fate was sealed long ago.
Black Dot
I am El Presidente of the Rebel Black Dot Society. Judging by the results of a preliminary Google search, the Rebel Black Dot Society is far more active than those jerks in the Black Dot Soceity. Either that, or the wiley bastards have gone underground. Hmmmmmm. No matter, their fate was sealed long ago.
Saturday, January 17, 2004
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 17
See, here's the problem. There is no connection between my either my mustache or my imperial and my beard proper. Mustache looks "okay." Imperial looks great as always. Beard looks "okay," but there is no landbridge connecting it to the 'stache. It's not that those hairs are still too short, there are simply no hairs there.
Dan the Man came up today and we watched some Excel Saga. Ho ho, that is one seriously messed up show. No Space Butler, but still plenty of just plain bizarreness.
There really needs to be a store called the Bizarre Bazaar.
See, here's the problem. There is no connection between my either my mustache or my imperial and my beard proper. Mustache looks "okay." Imperial looks great as always. Beard looks "okay," but there is no landbridge connecting it to the 'stache. It's not that those hairs are still too short, there are simply no hairs there.
Dan the Man came up today and we watched some Excel Saga. Ho ho, that is one seriously messed up show. No Space Butler, but still plenty of just plain bizarreness.
There really needs to be a store called the Bizarre Bazaar.
Friday, January 16, 2004
Do you know how cold it is? It's so cold that I'm wearing my Finnish big fur hat. You all know me, I'm a big, fat, bearded weirdo, I never wear hats. I hardly ever need to. My body features an incredibly efficient heat retention system. Yet, it is so blasted cold outside that I'm wearing my ridiculous-looking fur hat and, if it weren't for the skywalks at school, I probably would have put the liner in my parka. All that said, it's downright balmy here compared to what those bastards in the northeast are experiencing.
I love Winter. It's so cold outside that I'm having to wear my hat, but that should not be misinterpretted as a complaint. I love the cold. I love the snow. I only wish it were cloudier, damn the accursed Sun. (Again, all that said, I pray the Almighty looks after those without adequate shelter.)
Hey Ya? Hell no!
I used to like the song "Hey Ya." It's stupid, but catchy and irresistably fun. That was of course before the Mountain declared it the single greatest triumph of all Mankind, the best song ever, and the central theme to his life. I swear to Bog the next time I hear that fucking song I'm going to scream.
In better musical news, I think my favorite song off The Man Comes Around would have to be "Sam Hall":
"My name it is SamHall, it is Sam Hall
My name it is Sam Hall, it is Sam Hall
My name it is Sam Hall and I hate you one and all
I hate you one and all, damn your eyes!"
Vote For Kodos
The Republican:
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Democrats:
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
Al Sharpton of New York
quitters
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
I love Winter. It's so cold outside that I'm having to wear my hat, but that should not be misinterpretted as a complaint. I love the cold. I love the snow. I only wish it were cloudier, damn the accursed Sun. (Again, all that said, I pray the Almighty looks after those without adequate shelter.)
Hey Ya? Hell no!
I used to like the song "Hey Ya." It's stupid, but catchy and irresistably fun. That was of course before the Mountain declared it the single greatest triumph of all Mankind, the best song ever, and the central theme to his life. I swear to Bog the next time I hear that fucking song I'm going to scream.
In better musical news, I think my favorite song off The Man Comes Around would have to be "Sam Hall":
"My name it is SamHall, it is Sam Hall
My name it is Sam Hall, it is Sam Hall
My name it is Sam Hall and I hate you one and all
I hate you one and all, damn your eyes!"
Vote For Kodos
The Republican:
President George W. Bush of Texas
The Democrats:
fmr. Governor Howard Dean of Vermont
Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
Representative Richard Gephardt of Missouri
fmr. General Wesley Clark of Arkansas
Senator Joseph Lieberman of Connecticut
Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
Al Sharpton of New York
quitters
fmr. Ambassador Carol Mosely Braun of Illinois
Senator Bob Graham of Florida
Thursday, January 15, 2004
The Newsletter Strikes Back
The line-up thus far:
Jim Platte, "The Hot Plate"
Zach Nie, "Verbal Herpes"
Brad Dupay, "The Raised Eyebrow"
Kevin Stermer, "Best Damn D.P. In Hollywood" (cartoon)
Mike Wilson, "The Last Angry Man"
Contributors will include:
David Wilson, "Is It Too Much to Ask?"
Jon Mace and the amazing world of science in "Ask the Professor"
Mike Alber, "Jery's Kids"
If you are interested in subscribing, email your address to sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 15
The weirdest part about this entire misbegotten enterprise is that no area itches more than the ends of my "shit-stache." Right above each corner of my mouth, my skin is very sensitive, you could even say red and irritated. Being a member of Real Can of Yams, I suppose I have no choice but to leave it red and irritated. *sigh* Gods below, what sort of band has "leave it red and irritated" among its lyrics?
The line-up thus far:
Jim Platte, "The Hot Plate"
Zach Nie, "Verbal Herpes"
Brad Dupay, "The Raised Eyebrow"
Kevin Stermer, "Best Damn D.P. In Hollywood" (cartoon)
Mike Wilson, "The Last Angry Man"
Contributors will include:
David Wilson, "Is It Too Much to Ask?"
Jon Mace and the amazing world of science in "Ask the Professor"
Mike Alber, "Jery's Kids"
If you are interested in subscribing, email your address to sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 15
The weirdest part about this entire misbegotten enterprise is that no area itches more than the ends of my "shit-stache." Right above each corner of my mouth, my skin is very sensitive, you could even say red and irritated. Being a member of Real Can of Yams, I suppose I have no choice but to leave it red and irritated. *sigh* Gods below, what sort of band has "leave it red and irritated" among its lyrics?
You know something's not quite right when President Hu of China is easier to work with than President Roh of South Korea.
Red Star Over China
Research the lives and careers of the following 20th century Chinese leaders:
Hu Yaobang
Zhang Ziyang
Hua Guofeng
Deng Xiaoping
I finished Wild Swans and I still cannot say which event was the greatest tragedy of the 20th century: the Great Leap Forward or the Cultural Revolution. In simple numbers, the Holocaust pales in comparison to either of them.
Red Star Over China
Research the lives and careers of the following 20th century Chinese leaders:
Hu Yaobang
Zhang Ziyang
Hua Guofeng
Deng Xiaoping
I finished Wild Swans and I still cannot say which event was the greatest tragedy of the 20th century: the Great Leap Forward or the Cultural Revolution. In simple numbers, the Holocaust pales in comparison to either of them.
Wednesday, January 14, 2004
Note to self: though they may be the coolest shoes in the world, Chuck Taylors are nigh useless in the Winter. Or, more specifically, they are fine on cold days, but lousy for trudging through snow. Of course, I have to teach myself this lesson three or four times each Winter. Hee hee.
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
The glorious Ms. Deschanel, in addition to being a fine thespian, is also a gifted singer and performs around Los Angeles as one half of the cabaret act, If All the Stars Were Pretty Babies. Plus, she's gorgeous both blonde and with her natural black hair.
Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
The glorious Ms. Deschanel, in addition to being a fine thespian, is also a gifted singer and performs around Los Angeles as one half of the cabaret act, If All the Stars Were Pretty Babies. Plus, she's gorgeous both blonde and with her natural black hair.
Tuesday, January 13, 2004
Everything sucks. Reel Big Fish has a song (and a compilation) titled "Everything Sucks." It is about everything sucking, because they are a cheerfully pessimistic band. (Their song "Good Thing" is disturbing in that it appears to be a non-ironic ode to how good things can be. Creepy.) By contrast, though they complain about adult oppression, MxPx is an upbeat band. They aren't pollyannas, but them seem happy and joyful. Therefore, it seemed out of place when I learned a song off their latest album is titled "Everything Sucks." What? That doesn't sound like the MxPx I know and love. Fear not, though, friends, all is well. The song is titled "Everything Sucks (When You're Gone)"; it's about missing your girl when she's way. I love both bands when they are who they are. In both cases, everything rocks when "Everything Sucks."
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 13
Now that we've reached lucky number thirteen, BBB updates will be scaled back from daily to every other daily. It's not a beard, but it's something.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 13
Now that we've reached lucky number thirteen, BBB updates will be scaled back from daily to every other daily. It's not a beard, but it's something.
Monday, January 12, 2004
Hurray, new episodes of Teen Titans! Starfire, the most beautiful woman on two planets.
Today, I was reading about the Cultural Revolution, specifically abouts the Red Guards and the fall of Liu Shaoqi. The price of free will is that God lets us make these kinds of mistakes. Sometimes, I think that price is too high.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 12
Today, two bits of somewhat good news. a) It is nice to see my imperial slowly but surely returning to its former glory. b) The line between my sideburns and my "beard" is beginning to blur. Just beginning, mind you, but at this point any progress is welcome. (Trust me, sports fans, there is a fate worse than reading these posts: actually living the nightmare.)
THE NEWSLETTER
The Newsletter is back. The first issue comes out in one month, just in time for the feast day of Saint Valentine. If you wish to subscribe, email me your address at sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
Today, I was reading about the Cultural Revolution, specifically abouts the Red Guards and the fall of Liu Shaoqi. The price of free will is that God lets us make these kinds of mistakes. Sometimes, I think that price is too high.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 12
Today, two bits of somewhat good news. a) It is nice to see my imperial slowly but surely returning to its former glory. b) The line between my sideburns and my "beard" is beginning to blur. Just beginning, mind you, but at this point any progress is welcome. (Trust me, sports fans, there is a fate worse than reading these posts: actually living the nightmare.)
THE NEWSLETTER
The Newsletter is back. The first issue comes out in one month, just in time for the feast day of Saint Valentine. If you wish to subscribe, email me your address at sonofthenewsletter@yahoo.com.
The heater is broken in French Hall. And by that I mean it's stuck on high, resulting in an interior temperature in the mid-80s. Oh, I am really not happy about having to go back in there this afternoon.
In other news, I lied, there is no other news.
Vote For Kodos
And excellent reminder from Time to Deanie or any of the other Democrats. The next time they speak about "restoring America's alliances," they would do well to remember the famous, if cynical, words of Lord Palmerston, "Nations have no permanent alliances, only permanent interests."
In other news, I lied, there is no other news.
Vote For Kodos
And excellent reminder from Time to Deanie or any of the other Democrats. The next time they speak about "restoring America's alliances," they would do well to remember the famous, if cynical, words of Lord Palmerston, "Nations have no permanent alliances, only permanent interests."
It's not that I don't play video games, I don't even like video games. Yet, several times a week I find myself watching Tech TV's video game review show X-Play. Why? Because I am absolutely entranced by Morgan Webb; I am enchanted by her. Oh, Morgan....
The Very Model of a Modern Major General
United Federation of Planets
Starfleet uses a naval-based rank system:
Fleet Admiral
Admiral
Commodore (in disuse by the 24th century)
Fleet Captain
Captain
Commander
Lieutenant Commander
Lieutenant
Lieutenant (junior grade)
Ensign
**********
Chief Petty Officer
Senior Chief Specialist
Crewman (various grades)
Romulan Star Empire
The Romulan Guard also uses a naval system, with a Roman twist:
Admiral
Commander
Sub-Commander
Centurion
The Tal Shiar (the KGB), by contrast, uses a military (army) system:
Colonel
Major
Klingon Empire
The Klingon Defense Forces use a hybrid naval/military system:
General
Brigadier
Captain
Commander
Lieutenant
Cardassian Union
In a lovely change of pace, the Cardassian military (no known formal name) uses a homemade system:
Legate
Gul
Glinn
Breen Confederacy
Those wacky and mysterious Breens also use a homemade system, of which we have only one example:
Thot
The Very Model of a Modern Major General
United Federation of Planets
Starfleet uses a naval-based rank system:
Fleet Admiral
Admiral
Commodore (in disuse by the 24th century)
Fleet Captain
Captain
Commander
Lieutenant Commander
Lieutenant
Lieutenant (junior grade)
Ensign
**********
Chief Petty Officer
Senior Chief Specialist
Crewman (various grades)
Romulan Star Empire
The Romulan Guard also uses a naval system, with a Roman twist:
Admiral
Commander
Sub-Commander
Centurion
The Tal Shiar (the KGB), by contrast, uses a military (army) system:
Colonel
Major
Klingon Empire
The Klingon Defense Forces use a hybrid naval/military system:
General
Brigadier
Captain
Commander
Lieutenant
Cardassian Union
In a lovely change of pace, the Cardassian military (no known formal name) uses a homemade system:
Legate
Gul
Glinn
Breen Confederacy
Those wacky and mysterious Breens also use a homemade system, of which we have only one example:
Thot
Sunday, January 11, 2004
M2K4
Thirteen days until Opportunity's landing. Vaya con Dios, little Opportunity, do us proud just like your brother, Spirit.
Vote For Kodos
Because my boy* Deanie is on the cover (the marketing ploy worked!), I bought the latest issue of Time magazine. The article on Deanie wasn't very interesting, but they had a spread of photographs taken at El Presidente's ranch in Crawford, Texas. The spread was titled, quite amusingly, "...Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch." Within, I found my favourite picture of the president: he is wearing a heavy flannel shirt with a black T-shirt underneath, gloves, charcoal jeans, a huge Texas-sixed beltbuckle which reads "George W. Bush," and sunglasses. He is holding a well-used chainsaw and appears to be clearing underbrush. I like this picture because the president looks much more comfortable in jeans than he ever does in a suit; in a suit, he always looks like he can't wait to get out of it and into his jeans. He can't wait to get back to the ranch. I like that picture because I like George W. Bush. I do not like many of his policies, but I like the man. I would like to have him over for dinner at my house.
*By "my boy," I mean that I sincerely hope Dr. Dean wins the Democrat nomination for the presidency. I do this because I believe he would continue the fine tradition of George McGovern, Jimmy Carter ('80), Fritz Mondale, Michael Dukakis, and Al Gore and lead his party to glorious defeat this November.
Thirteen days until Opportunity's landing. Vaya con Dios, little Opportunity, do us proud just like your brother, Spirit.
Vote For Kodos
Because my boy* Deanie is on the cover (the marketing ploy worked!), I bought the latest issue of Time magazine. The article on Deanie wasn't very interesting, but they had a spread of photographs taken at El Presidente's ranch in Crawford, Texas. The spread was titled, quite amusingly, "...Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch." Within, I found my favourite picture of the president: he is wearing a heavy flannel shirt with a black T-shirt underneath, gloves, charcoal jeans, a huge Texas-sixed beltbuckle which reads "George W. Bush," and sunglasses. He is holding a well-used chainsaw and appears to be clearing underbrush. I like this picture because the president looks much more comfortable in jeans than he ever does in a suit; in a suit, he always looks like he can't wait to get out of it and into his jeans. He can't wait to get back to the ranch. I like that picture because I like George W. Bush. I do not like many of his policies, but I like the man. I would like to have him over for dinner at my house.
*By "my boy," I mean that I sincerely hope Dr. Dean wins the Democrat nomination for the presidency. I do this because I believe he would continue the fine tradition of George McGovern, Jimmy Carter ('80), Fritz Mondale, Michael Dukakis, and Al Gore and lead his party to glorious defeat this November.
Well, I know a lot more about the Ottoman Empire than I did this time yesterday. Woo hoo! Yay, knowledge!
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 11
Gah, I can't believe I have to go out in public looking like this. I can't believe I have to go to Mass looking like this. It'll all be worth it, though, once all the world has to bask in the horridness of my beard. Bwa ha ha ha ha!
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 11
Gah, I can't believe I have to go out in public looking like this. I can't believe I have to go to Mass looking like this. It'll all be worth it, though, once all the world has to bask in the horridness of my beard. Bwa ha ha ha ha!
A quote from Matt Pearce, head coach of the Grand Blanc High School Boys' Swimming and Diving Team, "Shit man. I've been killing them. They hate it, and I love it, man." Pearce was the assistant coach way back when I was on the team; back then he seemed to own forty-seven different Phish T-shirts. I'm so proud of the cruel tyrant he's become. Seriously.
Things I need to know more about (this is by no means a complete list)
a) Tamerlane
b) 19th century Mexican and Latin American politics
c) plotting a novel
d) how to live a health life and drop dead suddenly at age sixty
e) the Crusader States
f) Chinese history pre-1900
g) the USA PATRIOT Act (unbeknownst to most people, PATRIOT is, in fact, an acronym)
h) *shudder* Victorian literature
i) the Great War
j) the House of Hapsburg
k) the state of ska in 21st century America (there have to be good bands out there I haven't heard of, there just have to be)
l) how to trick a girl into liking me
m) the details of the Maastricht Treaty
That kid Raycroft you plays goalie for the Bruins? Man, he's killing me.
Tom Brady on the other hand, I love that guy. (On a related note, fuck Drew Henson.)
Vote For Kodos
We draw ever closer to the bizarre, Tammany Hall-esque exercise called the Iowa caucuses. What is it with those people? Why are they so terrified by the idea of *gasp* elections? Freaks.
Things I need to know more about (this is by no means a complete list)
a) Tamerlane
b) 19th century Mexican and Latin American politics
c) plotting a novel
d) how to live a health life and drop dead suddenly at age sixty
e) the Crusader States
f) Chinese history pre-1900
g) the USA PATRIOT Act (unbeknownst to most people, PATRIOT is, in fact, an acronym)
h) *shudder* Victorian literature
i) the Great War
j) the House of Hapsburg
k) the state of ska in 21st century America (there have to be good bands out there I haven't heard of, there just have to be)
l) how to trick a girl into liking me
m) the details of the Maastricht Treaty
That kid Raycroft you plays goalie for the Bruins? Man, he's killing me.
Tom Brady on the other hand, I love that guy. (On a related note, fuck Drew Henson.)
Vote For Kodos
We draw ever closer to the bizarre, Tammany Hall-esque exercise called the Iowa caucuses. What is it with those people? Why are they so terrified by the idea of *gasp* elections? Freaks.
Saturday, January 10, 2004
Yesterday, I looked over a writing sample for Skeeter. (I was checking it for spelling, duplicated sentences, just giving it a once over.) Oh dear Lord, it was one of the most mind-numbingly boring things I have ever read, which is saying a lot, since I have a poli sci degree. Legalese is the worst language on Earth, because it endlessly turns back on itself; no other language spends as much time to say the same thing in so many different ways. Gah, it's dreadful. Obviously, this reinforces my desire to not attend law school, but it also raises the question: if not law school, what am I going to do with my life? I am twenty-four years old. It is well-past time to become *sigh* an adult. That doesn't mean I have to suck, like most adults do, but it is time to be a man, to make my own way in the world. Now if only I knew how to go about doing that....
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 10
The crap on my face is almost beginning to look like hair.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 10
The crap on my face is almost beginning to look like hair.
Friday, January 9, 2004
Okay, what the fuck?! From school, I was able to read (and comment upon) Skeeter's blog. But, here at home, I cannot get the page to update; it is stuck on New Year's Eve and the page will not refresh. Why in the high holy hell not? I fucking hate computers. I cannot wait until we switch over to femputers.
Red Star Over China
Your homework for the day is to research and identify the 20th century Chinese leaders listed below. Once you know who they are, email me and, if you're correct, you'll get a gold star. Or perhaps a red star would be more apropos.
Comrade Liu Shaoqi
Comrade Peng Dehuai
Comrade Lin Biao
Comrade Zhou Enlai
Turning Japanese
In the Star Trek universe, almost all Asians appear to be Japanese. Among the five series, there are five prominent Asian characters*, both regulars and recurring characters. Four of those five would seem to be either Japanese or of Japanese descent:
Hikaru Sulu - Star Trek
Keiko O'Brien (maiden name: Keiko Ishikawa) - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Alyssa Ogawa - Star Trek: The Next Generation
Harry Kim - Star Trek: V'Ger... er, Voyager
Hoshi Sato - Star Trek: Enterprise
So, that's four Japanese and one Korean. There aren't Chinese in the future? Or Cambodians? Or Thais, Vietnamese, or Filipinos, et al.? Nothing offensive is meant by this, it's just an oddity I noticed the other day. Of course, I'm not helping the situation with my constant dmeands for more Daniel Dae Kim.
*I am not counting children, though they make the situation even more Nihon-o-centric: Demora Sulu - Star Trek Generations; Molly O'Brien - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine; Kirayoshi O'Brien - Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Apparently, it's a very Asian day. Fitting, as I'm reading Jung Chang's Wild Swans and last night I caught the last half of Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story on TV.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 9
I look horrible. As I feared, I simply do not have hair on my cheeks. I have nice sideburns which, were I so inclined, I could grow into gnarly muttonchops, but from my sideburns to my chin, the hair sticks to my jawline, not daring to venture further north. Blast! As far as the underside of the jaw, though, I'm all set. Neckbeard, here I come.
Red Star Over China
Your homework for the day is to research and identify the 20th century Chinese leaders listed below. Once you know who they are, email me and, if you're correct, you'll get a gold star. Or perhaps a red star would be more apropos.
Comrade Liu Shaoqi
Comrade Peng Dehuai
Comrade Lin Biao
Comrade Zhou Enlai
Turning Japanese
In the Star Trek universe, almost all Asians appear to be Japanese. Among the five series, there are five prominent Asian characters*, both regulars and recurring characters. Four of those five would seem to be either Japanese or of Japanese descent:
Hikaru Sulu - Star Trek
Keiko O'Brien (maiden name: Keiko Ishikawa) - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Alyssa Ogawa - Star Trek: The Next Generation
Harry Kim - Star Trek: V'Ger... er, Voyager
Hoshi Sato - Star Trek: Enterprise
So, that's four Japanese and one Korean. There aren't Chinese in the future? Or Cambodians? Or Thais, Vietnamese, or Filipinos, et al.? Nothing offensive is meant by this, it's just an oddity I noticed the other day. Of course, I'm not helping the situation with my constant dmeands for more Daniel Dae Kim.
*I am not counting children, though they make the situation even more Nihon-o-centric: Demora Sulu - Star Trek Generations; Molly O'Brien - Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine; Kirayoshi O'Brien - Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Apparently, it's a very Asian day. Fitting, as I'm reading Jung Chang's Wild Swans and last night I caught the last half of Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story on TV.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 9
I look horrible. As I feared, I simply do not have hair on my cheeks. I have nice sideburns which, were I so inclined, I could grow into gnarly muttonchops, but from my sideburns to my chin, the hair sticks to my jawline, not daring to venture further north. Blast! As far as the underside of the jaw, though, I'm all set. Neckbeard, here I come.
Thursday, January 8, 2004
There has been a great deal of discussion of late about Pete Rose, mostly initiated by interviews he has done to promote his new book. All I know about Pete Rose is that he brought shame and embarrassment to baseball, and for that alone he should be given a medal. Way to go, Pete, America needs more men like you! If we all work together, we can end baseball as a major sport in this country. Keep the dream alive.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 8
Today, my faith is waivering. I don't even want a beard. I mean, I'm curious to see what it would look like, but I have every intention to going back to my old look as soon as possible. Why the hell am I even doing this? I look like shit, I feel dirty, and about the only good thing I can say is that the itching is not as bad as I'd anticipated. This is bullshit.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 8
Today, my faith is waivering. I don't even want a beard. I mean, I'm curious to see what it would look like, but I have every intention to going back to my old look as soon as possible. Why the hell am I even doing this? I look like shit, I feel dirty, and about the only good thing I can say is that the itching is not as bad as I'd anticipated. This is bullshit.
Wednesday, January 7, 2004
Klaatu barada nikto. "We do not claim to have achieved perfection. But we have a system, and it works."
Before Everything & After by MxPx. Liz Phair by Liz Phair. American IV: The Man Comes Around by Johnny Cash, may he rest in peace. Everything to Everyone by Barenaked Ladies. Blink-182 by Blink-182. Well, I guess four out of five isn't too bad.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 7
This sucks. The itching has not yet begun in earnest, but I feel icky all the time. At least I cut my hair today, which always makes me feel better.
Before Everything & After by MxPx. Liz Phair by Liz Phair. American IV: The Man Comes Around by Johnny Cash, may he rest in peace. Everything to Everyone by Barenaked Ladies. Blink-182 by Blink-182. Well, I guess four out of five isn't too bad.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 7
This sucks. The itching has not yet begun in earnest, but I feel icky all the time. At least I cut my hair today, which always makes me feel better.
Tuesday, January 6, 2004
Yeah, so I'm taking out the trash (not the kitchen trash, all the trash; tomorrow's trash day! Hurrah!) and my dad comes downstairs. I left the TV on ABC because I was going to watch I'm With Her at 8:30 (this was about 8:15). Dad changes the channel and then marches upstairs. Upstairs, he was watching a different program. So, he comes downstairs and changes the channel of a television he isn't watching and then, in a different room, watches an entirely different channel. What on Heaven or Earth could possibly make that a rational plan? How does that make sense inside anyone's head? "What the fuck?!" does not even begin to approach the inexplicable nature of this act. I mean, I mean, COME ON!
There are days I wish I was Jewish. This situation definitely calls for an "oy," but I'm a ruddy-faced Limey-Scotch-Mick Catholic and, let's be frank, I cannot pull of "oy." I sound like the very model of a modern major toolbox.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 6
Yeah, not really much itching today; that's good news. On the other hand, I look like poo. Still, any mistake worth making is worth making huge.
There are days I wish I was Jewish. This situation definitely calls for an "oy," but I'm a ruddy-faced Limey-Scotch-Mick Catholic and, let's be frank, I cannot pull of "oy." I sound like the very model of a modern major toolbox.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 6
Yeah, not really much itching today; that's good news. On the other hand, I look like poo. Still, any mistake worth making is worth making huge.
Monday, January 5, 2004
Sunday, January 4, 2004
Mars Attacks!
Sweet, NASA has received a signal from the Spirit rover! Woo hoo! Unlike Britain's Beagle 2, our rover works. Make no mistake, I love the Brits, but the chode in charge of Beagle 2 is a) in league with the Europeans and b) was engaging in some pretty venomous trash talking before his baby turned out to be a dud. Piss off, you wanker! Or, if you rather, "U-S-A! U-S-A!" No, no, that's not right; in the immortal words of Richard Nixon, immortalized in the plaque left behind by the crew of Apollo 11, "We came in peace for all Mankind." There's little reason to believe we'll ever hear from little* Beagle 2, but I hope we do. Also, I wish a successful landing to Spirit's brother Opportunity in its January 24 landing.
*Beagle 2 is roughly analogous in size to the American Sojourner rover, the cute little guy who trucked around Mars in the Summer of 1997. Yeah, six years later, while the ESA was trash talking about finally catching up, we were building bigger, badder, and better rovers: Sojourner and Beagle 2 are each the size of a kitchen microwave, Spirit and Opportunity are the size of friggin' golf carts! Yeah, that deserves a chorus. "U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!"
Sweet, NASA has received a signal from the Spirit rover! Woo hoo! Unlike Britain's Beagle 2, our rover works. Make no mistake, I love the Brits, but the chode in charge of Beagle 2 is a) in league with the Europeans and b) was engaging in some pretty venomous trash talking before his baby turned out to be a dud. Piss off, you wanker! Or, if you rather, "U-S-A! U-S-A!" No, no, that's not right; in the immortal words of Richard Nixon, immortalized in the plaque left behind by the crew of Apollo 11, "We came in peace for all Mankind." There's little reason to believe we'll ever hear from little* Beagle 2, but I hope we do. Also, I wish a successful landing to Spirit's brother Opportunity in its January 24 landing.
*Beagle 2 is roughly analogous in size to the American Sojourner rover, the cute little guy who trucked around Mars in the Summer of 1997. Yeah, six years later, while the ESA was trash talking about finally catching up, we were building bigger, badder, and better rovers: Sojourner and Beagle 2 are each the size of a kitchen microwave, Spirit and Opportunity are the size of friggin' golf carts! Yeah, that deserves a chorus. "U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!"
Saturday, January 3, 2004
Earth (pre-Federation)
Phoenix
S.S. Valiant
"The Expanse"-class
NX-class
Vulcan (pre-Federation)
Star Trek: First Contact-class Scoutship
"Carbon Creek"-class Scoutship
"Breaking the Ice"-class Cruiser
"Shadows of P'Jem"-class Combat Cruiser
Andoria (pre-Federation)
"Cease Fire"-class
United Federation of Planets
Daedalus-class
Oberth-class
Constitution-class
Miranda-class
Soyuz-class
Excelsior-class
Constellation-class
Ambassador-class
Olympia-class
Nebula-class
Galaxy-class
Defiant-class
Intrepid-class
Nova-class
Sovereign-class
Klingon Empire
D-series/D5-class, D7-class Battlecruiser
"Sleeping Dogs"-class Raptor
"Judgment"-class Bird-of-Prey
K'tinga-class Battlecruiser
B'rel-class Bird-of-Prey
K'Vort-class Bird-of-Prey
Vor'cha-class Attack Cruiser
Negh'Var-class
Romulan Star Empire
"Minefield"-class Warbird
"Balance of Terror"-class Bird-of-Prey
D'deridex-class Warbird
Star Trek:Nemesis-class Warbird
Scimitar-class (Reman) Warbird
Dominion
"The Jem'Hadar"-class Attack Fighter
"Ties of Blood and Water"-class Battleship
"Valiant"-class Battleship a.k.a. Jem'Hadar Super-Star Destroyer
"The Changing Face of Evil"-class (Breen)
Cardassian Union
Galor-class
Hideki-class
Keldon-class
Borg Collective
Cube-type
Sphere-type
Ferengi Alliance
D'Kora-class Marauder
Tholian Assembly
"Future Tense"-class
"The Tholian Web"-class
Phoenix
S.S. Valiant
"The Expanse"-class
NX-class
Vulcan (pre-Federation)
Star Trek: First Contact-class Scoutship
"Carbon Creek"-class Scoutship
"Breaking the Ice"-class Cruiser
"Shadows of P'Jem"-class Combat Cruiser
Andoria (pre-Federation)
"Cease Fire"-class
United Federation of Planets
Daedalus-class
Oberth-class
Constitution-class
Miranda-class
Soyuz-class
Excelsior-class
Constellation-class
Ambassador-class
Olympia-class
Nebula-class
Galaxy-class
Defiant-class
Intrepid-class
Nova-class
Sovereign-class
Klingon Empire
D-series/D5-class, D7-class Battlecruiser
"Sleeping Dogs"-class Raptor
"Judgment"-class Bird-of-Prey
K'tinga-class Battlecruiser
B'rel-class Bird-of-Prey
K'Vort-class Bird-of-Prey
Vor'cha-class Attack Cruiser
Negh'Var-class
Romulan Star Empire
"Minefield"-class Warbird
"Balance of Terror"-class Bird-of-Prey
D'deridex-class Warbird
Star Trek:Nemesis-class Warbird
Scimitar-class (Reman) Warbird
Dominion
"The Jem'Hadar"-class Attack Fighter
"Ties of Blood and Water"-class Battleship
"Valiant"-class Battleship a.k.a. Jem'Hadar Super-Star Destroyer
"The Changing Face of Evil"-class (Breen)
Cardassian Union
Galor-class
Hideki-class
Keldon-class
Borg Collective
Cube-type
Sphere-type
Ferengi Alliance
D'Kora-class Marauder
Tholian Assembly
"Future Tense"-class
"The Tholian Web"-class
Christmas should be lasting all year long. Early January is normally a pretty sad time of year, but this is the worst. My sister's back in DC (though, good for her), my brother's in Troy tonight and soon will be back in A2 (good for him), and back at the ranch we're taking down the Christmas decorations, which always makes the house feel empty. We took down the tree today for the purpose of boxing it up and putting it out in the shed before the snow falls tonight; we'll take down the rest of the decorations tomorrow. The current heat wave makes this nearly infinitely worse. Listen, it's January; so, everything is dead. Given that, wouldn't a bed of pristine snow be prettier than the sickly green of dead grass? Yes, it would. Fifty degrees in January is bullshit.
Everybody is so happy it's warm. What the fuck is wrong with you people? Would you be happy if it was fifty in July? No, of course you wouldn't. And as much as I loathe the heat, I wouldn't either. I want it to be hot in July and cold in January. Everything in its season, damn it. Is it too much to ask?
I don't know why, it might be the weather, but it feels like a million years since we returned from Texas. Those seem like the good old days. Weird. (Not being in Texas, but the 30th and 31st. Apparently, I miss 2003.)
The Trekkie Project
I want to make Guy Zach Nie! into a Trekkie. Right now, he's a guy who worships at the alter of Deep Space Nine, but I don't think he's quite a Trekkie yet. To that end, though, I've loaned him the latest two Next Generation movies, Star Trek: Insurrection (IX) and Star Trek: Nemesis (X), and encouraged him to watch Star Trek: Enterprise as it is broadcast on TV.
He has expressed an interest in sequentially watching The Next Generation even though I've warned him about the awful awfulness of the first two seasons. Methinks this bodes well for the future of the project.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 3
I never really feel clean with stubble. (Of course, what I've got barely qualifies as stubble.) I wish I could shave right now. I can't believe I'm going to go to Mass looking like this. As C-3PO would say, "How horrid!"
Everybody is so happy it's warm. What the fuck is wrong with you people? Would you be happy if it was fifty in July? No, of course you wouldn't. And as much as I loathe the heat, I wouldn't either. I want it to be hot in July and cold in January. Everything in its season, damn it. Is it too much to ask?
I don't know why, it might be the weather, but it feels like a million years since we returned from Texas. Those seem like the good old days. Weird. (Not being in Texas, but the 30th and 31st. Apparently, I miss 2003.)
The Trekkie Project
I want to make Guy Zach Nie! into a Trekkie. Right now, he's a guy who worships at the alter of Deep Space Nine, but I don't think he's quite a Trekkie yet. To that end, though, I've loaned him the latest two Next Generation movies, Star Trek: Insurrection (IX) and Star Trek: Nemesis (X), and encouraged him to watch Star Trek: Enterprise as it is broadcast on TV.
He has expressed an interest in sequentially watching The Next Generation even though I've warned him about the awful awfulness of the first two seasons. Methinks this bodes well for the future of the project.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 3
I never really feel clean with stubble. (Of course, what I've got barely qualifies as stubble.) I wish I could shave right now. I can't believe I'm going to go to Mass looking like this. As C-3PO would say, "How horrid!"
Friday, January 2, 2004
Thursday, January 1, 2004
Lloyd Carr's Keys to (USC's) Victory
1. Braylon Edwards playing like Braylon Edwards. It would have been an easy seven points on the first drive of the game, but good old Stonehands displayed his usual dexterity. Ah well, at least he's consistent.
2. The O-line. I want to own my own NFL team and hire each of these jerks, just so I can have the pleasure of firing their bloated, worthless arses. Thanks for not blocking anything all day, fuckers.
3. John Navarre ended his career at Michigan the way he played his career at Michigan: mired hip-deep in frustration and futility.
My sincerest wish is that Braylon Edwards listens to his raging ego and enters the NFL draft. He won't accomplish anything as a pro, but at least he'll be out of my hair.
1. Braylon Edwards playing like Braylon Edwards. It would have been an easy seven points on the first drive of the game, but good old Stonehands displayed his usual dexterity. Ah well, at least he's consistent.
2. The O-line. I want to own my own NFL team and hire each of these jerks, just so I can have the pleasure of firing their bloated, worthless arses. Thanks for not blocking anything all day, fuckers.
3. John Navarre ended his career at Michigan the way he played his career at Michigan: mired hip-deep in frustration and futility.
My sincerest wish is that Braylon Edwards listens to his raging ego and enters the NFL draft. He won't accomplish anything as a pro, but at least he'll be out of my hair.
My brother feels that it is important a man feels welcome in his own home; you know, not put out in his own castle. He believes in this principle so strongly that on New Year's Day, the greatest college football day of the year, he's watching a DVD with the volume set so high that I've been forced upstairs in order to hear the Purdue-Georgia game. Way to be, David.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 1
I shaved today for the last time for a long time. "Lonestar, we meet at last, for the first time, for the last time." It's weird to shave without taking a shower either before or after. Well, we shall see how this debacle progresses.
Banzai Beard Bonanza: Day 1
I shaved today for the last time for a long time. "Lonestar, we meet at last, for the first time, for the last time." It's weird to shave without taking a shower either before or after. Well, we shall see how this debacle progresses.
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