What the hell is a civil union?
Explain this to me: why is it kosher for two people who just met twenty minutes ago to get married in Las Vegas, as long as they are of opposite genders, while two men who have been devoted to each other for forty years cannot enjoy anything approaching the same legal status? This makes no sense to me whatsoever. My mom tries to be nice to everyone. She thinks homosexuals should have all the same rights and privilidges of straight folk. This includes marriage, as long as you don't call it marriage. Byeh? Her only objection is the word. Two women should be able to enter a legal union, which would be the exact same as marriage, just not called marriage. What? I do not agree with people who oppose gay marriage, but at least I understand their position. I do not understand my mom's need to play games with semantics. I think the illogic of it goes something like this:

{1} A rose by any other name would smell as sweet. Maybe the words aren't important. Marriage, civil union, the name doesn't matter as long as homosexual couples enjoy the same legal standing as hetero couples. We have a long cultural heritage of the word marriage implying a bonding between husband and wife, usually resulting in children. As long as people have the rights, why can't we keep our word the same as it has always been?

{2} Separate but equal. Fan of the sound of my own voice that I am, I tend to think that words are important. If a civil union carries all the same rights as a marriage, why not call it a marriage? By giving it a different name, a name that does not have a long cultural heritage, we are saying that civil unions aren't marriage, which inevitably leads to civil unions being considered inferior to marriage. Which then implies homosexuals are inferior, which is both un-American and un-Christian.

I admire those who are campaigning for civil unions around this country. They are doing so against the strong oppostion of many people, yet by campaigning for civil unions instad of marriage, they are trying to show sensitivity to their opposition. In the same position, I would not feel as generous. Of course, I also respect those who have religious objections to homosexuality and thus gay marriage. Many of these people are good people, people of good conscience and strong conviction. I disagree with them, but I admire anyone who stands up for what they believe to be right.

But then there are the bigots. Take my father, for example. He opposes homosexuality and thus gay marriage because it does not result in procreation. He calls it a dead end for the species. If that is his objection to gay marriage, would he not also have to object to childless heterosexual marriage? For example, his friends Gary and Linda, who have no children. Or Coach Oldham and his wife, who never had children. When I posed this question to him, he did not answer me, but simply walked away. Fortunately, the Nazis who spew this sort of hate speech are generally not included in the mainstream debate.

But, let us not allow this debate to be sidetracked by my personal enmity for meine vater. As a culture, we have made amazing strides in the last fifty years. We still have racial problems, but we no longer accept race as a legitimate reason for discrimination. We still have gender issues, but gender is becoming less and less acceptable as a reason for discrimination. We are more tolerant of a greater diversity of religions than ever before. We are so very close to be the enlightened society we have always dreamed we could be. We cannot allow our fear to stop us now.

...and of course, while I'm trying to do this the fucking cat keeps whining for attention. Motherfucker, I cannot pet you if you don't come over here.