After the Bonanza: Day 5
I shaved today for the first time since slaying the beard Saturday night. I had intended to do so earlier, but the beard-slaying shave was incredibly close. Now that my sideburns have been sculpted... daaaaaaaaaaaaammnn. Righty looks better than Lefty, but both look fantastic. If all of me looked as good as my sideburns, I'd be beating the honeys off with a stick. The beard might be a fine look for me in a decade or two, when I fear that my waredrobe will no longer be dominated by band T-shirts (today: Avoid One Thing, Joe "The Bass Fiddleman" Gittleman's side project) and blue jeans, but until then the sideburns and imperial rule. As a side note, I hope the imperial goes out of style soon, because I hate looking like just another tooly jerk. On a positive note, it feels good to be using the old Kiehl's Men's Alcohol-Free Herbal Toner again. Wooooo!

It's not the greatest time of year for sports. March Madness is almost over, Michigan failed to make the Frozen Four, football season is seemingly endless months away, and, worst of all, the blasted ten-month, sixty thousand game baseball season is beginning. Kill me now. But before that, there is still one ray of hope: the quest for Lord Stanley's Cup. For just about the first time all year, the Red Wings have most of their line-up on the ice instead of in the stands with injury; they have clinched the Western Conference and home ice through the the conference finals, and still have a chance to claim the President's Trophy for best regular-season record; and Manny Legace, with Cujo one of the last players still injured, whopped the Avalanche twice last week. Time to erase the memory of last year's debacle. Bring the Cup home to Hockeytown!

During a commerical break from Pardon The Interruption, I just saw an advertisement for Troy. Aws yeah, bring on the greatest story ever told.

Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day
Sure, we only celebrate Zooey Deschanel Appreciation Day one day a week, but isn't every day a good day to appreciate Zooey Deschanel?